Worth It

After graduation Dan's family is having a family reunion/Disneyworld vacation. Let's just take a moment to be super excited that my husband is going to actually be a doctor soon. One that people can call doctor. One that will actually make money. Yes! So the trip, at least for us, will probably just be celebrating that fact. That's the way to do a family reunion isn't it? His sister, very much like my mom and sister, has started planning. In fact it sounds like she's been thinking about planning for quite some time and now feels its close enough to the vacation date that she's willing to admit it. This feels very comfortable and familiar for me since I grew up with this type of planning happening around me. I prefer to happily agree to plans that are already made rather than make plans myself. Dan is the same way. That's probably why we spend about the first hour of every date driving around getting angry at each other. "I don't care where we go to eat! Just chose a place before I decide to eat YOU."

One thing that she has considerately helped us plan is a possible stroller rental. Dan told me so the other day and then said, "But I don't think we'll even need a stroller." HA! We will be walking all day everyday for a week and our son will only barely be two. We're going to need something. I'm sure he's thinking we're going to be taking our little umbrella stroller with us. And that would be the ah-hem, thrifty thing to do. He is always very responsible that way. But look at what you can get for only $15 for the first day and $8 each additional day:

So worth it.

This Weeks Goals

January has to be the worst month of the year for me. That being said, it is also Dan's birthday. Hooray! His birthday is today actually. So yesterday we celebrated it with a pancake cake and presents and then cake and ice cream in the evening. I'm not sure why his birthday helped me to decide this, but I've decided to make weekly goals. (We'll see how long that lasts.)

Here they are for this week:

• Enjoy my kids more
• Discipline with love instead of annoyance
• Start trying to teach personal prayer to my kids
• Formalize and write out a routine for our days and our weeks

If you can't tell by these goals, we have been having a less than peaceful atmosphere in our home. There have been many tears and frustration. I'm trying to lessen that. If it's just a week then I think we can do it.

Things That Make Me Happy

It is amazing to me that just about the time that I decided to change my attitude my situation changed and made it much easier for me to be happy. Yesterday it was like the fog lifted and everyone in the house was happier. Here are some things that contributed to my happiness:

Fresh vegetables that aren't exactly in season. They are so beautiful and yummy. Usually I don't buy them out of season because they are hugely expensive, but last night it was totally worth it.
The kids actually had enough energy to play by themselves yesterday. That meant a little more work for me trying to referee the two of them, still a little grumpy, and picking up a little more. Even with that though it was pretty awesome because who wouldn't want to come up on a kazoo loving tucked into bed for naptime?Last week with everything happening I decided one day that it was the day to start fixing another bedroom. I took the doors off the hinges and the hinges off the walls and the chair rail down and the molding along the floor up. I started to scrape the walls, but that was tiring so I stopped. Monday Dan must have decided it was time to start too because he picked up the work where I left off and scraped the rest of the walls and then painted the wood trim. I don't know why, but this project seems to be making me super excited. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!
And this last photo Greg is wearing a new shirt that Aunt Katie sent us in a care package. Her husband's family always does a "sick run" when someone in the family is sick. They pick up medications and treats and other things that will help the invalid. Even though she couldn't do a technical sick run she thought we might need it. Turns out we did. Dan took this photo of Greg after he ate his jellied toast for lunch today. Who couldn't be happy when they see that?

A Change of Attitude

Well, nothing changes one's attitude like serving someone else, which I got the opportunity to do last night. I had a friend's son sleep at our house while she went to the hospital to have her baby. With both kids still sick I was worried that none of us would get any sleep.

Truly the Lord blesses you when you serve others. This blessing was immediate in that our sleep over guest slept through the night entirely and my kids only woke up a handful of times and were easy to calm and put back to sleep. We all woke up this morning well rested and the news from my friend is all positive.

Poking my Head in the Sand

Daddy was welcomed home like a rock star. The kids were super excited. Greg learned over his week long absence that he is not actually Mama, but is Dada. He decided to show Dan that by saying it over and over all the way home from the airport. I think the excitement gave them more energy than they would have had because we played outside in the snow and went sledding down our little hill. Charlotte was super excited to tell Daddy about our "Ice cuticles."

Then that afternoon Charlotte's fever came back. Then the next day Greg started his fever. Then last night nobody slept for more than an hour at a time.

Dan has to leave today for another interview tomorrow. I'm sure it'll go great. At least it's a low pressure interview.

With A Cherry On Top

In case this week weren't long enough, we woke up today with Charlotte having a full blown cold. She's puked twice this morning before 9 AM. And I'm almost out of Motrin and Benadryl.

AND, it's snowing. So I had to shovel the walks before the little entrepreneurs came around looking cute and then taking me for all I've got.

Less than 24 hours left.

Making It With Style

I don't do well on my own. Some wives seem to do much better than I. For me at around day 4 or 5 I start feeling like it would be a good idea to start shooting people. Or at least saying really mean things. Because who doesn't like to be around a really grumpy person? Then I call my husband and find out that in fact his trip is going to be a day longer than I originally thought. In my attempt to make him want to never return home again I start to get angry and tell him I have to hang up the phone now. The next morning, after getting some sleep I have to call him and tell him that I'm sorry and I really just want him home.

I'm married to a very understanding husband.

Post Edit:

Also, I would like to direct everyone's attention to one of my friends and the person that has managed to pull me through this week. She posted on her blog about an amazing accomplishment of my little girl. (And with only one complete egg landing directly on the counter this time!) Hope you all enjoy.

Lewis and Clark

Sometimes when we go to the Magic House it really is magical. We went yesterday sometime after naptime. The kids had been up since 5:30 and Greg's nap was unusually short. In short, we were all cranky.

When I turned into the parking lot I hoped it would be a good day. The lot was maybe a quarter full. We would have the place pretty free. Then we started with the Lewis and Clark exhibit on the first floor. When I shot this video I knew we were going to have a good afternoon.

I've never seen Sacagawea and Lewis portrayed so well.

Resolutions

I don't think these are new year's resolutions. It's just that I've been thinking for a while now about things I would like to change and do better at. Then Christmas came and I had a lot of free time suddenly. So I decided there was no reason to put off starting (or re-starting) my goals. So, boring as it may be, here they are:

Make honest to goodness meals at lunch. You know, ones that involve more than one slice of the food pyramid. I think healthy, fulfilling lunches have been my lynch pin in our family's eating habits that I have neglected and has lead to much unhealthy snacking.

Also, I would like to be better about writing down our budget and making sure we stick to it. Fourth year in medical school pretty much trashed all our dilligence in that respect. We need to be keeping better track again.

Actually read the Sunday school and Relief Society lessons before going to my classes on Sunday. That's a pretty low bar to set on my scripture study, I know, but it's totally do-able and you have to start somewhere. Plus, I've really had the feeling lately that I need to "prepare myself." For what, I don't know, for when I don't know, but I'm pretty sure that this is part of it. I've learned to not ignore those feelings, even when I'm not sure how to proceed.

And finally get my body moving...again. I'm nervous about sharing this goal because I know it's so ambiguous. Here's the story, Dan and I are going to have another kid sometime. I want another one, he wants another one. Right now isn't the right time, but that time is coming. When that time comes I want to start out the pregnancy in the best shape of my life. That's not really that big a goal to set because I've never really done any organized sport or been the type to workout. The drawback to this situation is that I don't know what sort of physical activity I like to do. And also I've got two kids, and a husband that's either out of town or in a sub-internship. So what do I do that could actually work long term that I enjoy? What time commitment am I going to have to sacrifice to get this goal going? I'm not sure, but I do want to do something.

So there they are. My Resolutions.

PS. Also, Dan left this morning for another round of interviews including Utah, Seattle, and Fresno. Everyone think positive thought tomorrow for him.

Change Of Plans

I had great plans for productivity today. I was going to get out and go grocery shopping first thing in the morning and clean and organize all day long. I have so many projects on the precipice of being done that I think if I work hard today I will be able to check of so many boxes on the list that I never wrote down in the first place.

I woke up this morning excited and got to snuggle with the kids. Then we went downstairs to breakfast while Dan got to sleep in a little. After I was done eating breakfast I thought I would unload the dishwasher while the kids finished eating. I was all proud of my productive self.

That is until I found the mouse poop! YUCK. So I spent the "first thing" hour and a half seeking out and cleaning any area that had mouse poop. Luckily the mice did not get to the pantry. Now I'm going to be lucky if I can get everything together and in the right direction to get to the grocery store before the time that Greg would fall asleep in the car before a nap.

It seems like my plans never quite work out how I thought.

I Guess It's Time We Moved

Did anyone catch the weird weather in the Midwest on New Year's Eve? I had called my mom that morning and was sort of bragging about how even though it's December our weather was a balmy 62 degrees. As it turns out I think I would take snow, lots of snow, over 62 degrees in the end of December. Do you know what happens when that warm air mixes with the cold moist air?

Tornadoes. Lots of them.

I was at the Schnuck's parking lot when the tornado siren went off. It shares the lot with the fire station, which is where the siren is located. It was so loud I couldn't even understand what it said. And this part is where I know I've lived in St. Louis for too long. After hearing it go off a couple of times I thought, "ehh, I'll probably have enough time to finish my grocery shopping."

I finished the shopping and then came home and brought the groceries in just as the wind was really picking up and drops started to come down. If this had been three years ago I would have already been in the basement for half an hour. But since living here three years I've noticed that they have that siren even if the tornadoes aren't even close.

Even with the callous that had been worn into me I decided to turn on the TV and take a peak at the projected path of the storm. I wasn't really going to head to the basement. With that curiosity in me I saw the meteorologist say that a few tornadoes had touched down just south and west of the city. The vector path was heading directly for our neighborhood!

I realized I wasn't that seasoned I guess because we gathered ourselves together and brought Suzie to the basement while the rain came down and the tornado path moved through. We weren't in the basement for that long though because Charlotte was bumed we didn't break out the granola bars or the weather radio.

No tornado hit us or our neighbors, but you know it's a big one when it has it's own wikipedia page.

Happy New Year!

Our House Exploded

Other than having a huge storm system hit Utah at just about the same time we were supposed to take off to head home yesterday the trip home was nothing to comment on. We were de-iced twice and sat on the ground for around 2 hours. We did managed to still make our connection in Denver, which was also delayed, but only because we carried both children and went our fastest. They were boarding when we were landing. We finally made it to St. Louis at around 1:30AM.

Then we got home and collapsed.

This morning our kids did let us sleep in. Our cat did not.

We did manage to unpack all our 5 pieces of luggage, but we did not manage to find places for all of it. The kids are in toy and book heaven. We are just managing to get around the piles of things until we can get a few orginizational items later this evening.

Hope the winter travel isn't too bad for everyone else.

I'm leaving it up

If you didn't know that last post was my sister's, meant for her blog. I think it's funny so I'm keeping it up there. Hahahaha.

Tomorrow we go home so today I'm sorting through all our stuff trying to fit it all in the bags. I think it will all fit and that my friends, it what you call a Christmas Miracle.

Christmas Recap

How was your holiday?

Mine has been awesome. This year the ear doctor and I loaded up the truck and headed over over the rivers and through the snow to my grandmother's house in Utah. I just love being at her house...it always feels like home the minute I step through the door.

This year there were I few things that happened that I was exceptionally proud of:

1) We frosted gingerbread boys with my two nieces and didn't get any red frosting on my grandma's light colored carpet
2) We went bowling at the BYU campus lanes and even though I saw all 4 of Nie Nie's adorable kids with their dad I didn't act like a total fool and run over to gush over the cuteness of that little red-headed Jane
3) I got the ear doctor the perfect presents for his workshop (little circular saw and leather covered pneumatic stool) and only managed to forget to buy 1 battery...
4) I totally let my little nieces have the first couple of turns playing my new Disney karaoke game on the Wii instead of taking the microphone and belting out songs all by myself
5) I've limited myself to only a single can of diet coke a day


All in all, a pretty successful Christmas!

"Where Did You Get Those?"

Even though Dan left all the presents he bought just before leaving it wasn't a real loss. Firstly, he has the receipts so he can easily return them once we get home. Secondly, our plan (read: Dan's plan) was to wait until we got to Utah to do most of the Christmas shopping. Pretty good plan once he finally convinced me to stop stressing about not having everything done already.

Yesterday, Dan told me that he would just do the shopping and let me be free to take the kids to Tangled and other Christmas activities. I wrote down a list of people that we needed to get presents for and a few suggestions and then let him do his magic. He's an amazing present shopper. He did one marathon shopping trip with the ear doctor, our brother-in-law and was done just before dinner. He took things downstairs to keep in our bedroom while I took one at a time to wrap them. Well, it was a pretty busy night so I didn't get them all wrapped and I forgot about them completely right before bed.

We took both the kids into our bedroom to get them dressed in their Christmas pajamas. Charlotte climbed on the bed and pointed to the few presents that Dan, I mean Santa, had purchased for both the kids pointed and said, "Hey! Where did you get those presents?" We told her we'd talk about it in the morning and rushed her off to bed.

That explains our 9 PM shopping trip to Borders and Walmart last night. We were out trying to restore a little Christmas magic for our kids. Luckily we had about $30 in Borders gift cards to spend so it looks like Santa will visit this little family after all.

And also she forgot to ask about the presents this morning. Few!

This Will Surprise Nobody

For as smart and put together as he is, Dan sometimes forgets pretty basic things. That is why his family will not be surprised at all to hear that he forgot to pack the bag he put his nice clothing in and all the Christmas presents he bought the Saturday before we left for Christmas. He also thought he forgot to pack any shirts whatsoever, but on closer inspection, by me, three shirts were found.

We all have our moments right?

The Excitement is Building

Today we leave for great grandma's house. I can tell that the excitement is building for Christmas. We are finally healthy (enough) and even though we have a long day of packing, cleaning, and traveling we are all very excited.

Everyone cross your fingers that we have a good flying experience.

It Will Never End

Every year when we go to my side of the family someone gets sick. I remember the year I was pregnant with Charlotte and everyone got sick and I thought I might just die from all the puking. This year it wont be us! I can tell you this with complete confidence because we've been sick for the past month. This sickness has climaxed this past week with vomiting and diarrhea. We are getting it out of our system now so that it wont be our turn over the Christmas break. Also I plan on bringing hanitizer (Charlotte's word, not mine) and Clorox wipes with us on the airplane. I may be crazy, but at least I wont be sick.

In spite of all this horribleness, I would like to leave you with something I realized while drifting off to sleep last night. My husband makes me laugh out loud every single day. I think it may be a goal of his. He is truly a very funny person.

The Stats

I know it's boring but Greg's well child check was this week. His stats are as follows:

Height: 33 1/2 inches (Somewhere between 50-75%)
Weight: 25 pounds (Just under 50%)

Did you notice that he actually lost a pound between the last check up and now? Well, he did and nobody's worried about that because he's finally starting to be proportionate.

The Trend Continues

We woke up to 3 inches of snow this morning.

Dan woke up to rain in North Carolina.

For our enitre marriage Dan, the one that loves the snow, has missed most of it.

An Update From Last Night

The Benadryl didn't work. Turns out that it doesn't really help when your daughter has a fever. Then she'll wake up 5 times in a night and ask and ask for more medicine. And its very hard to tell her that you've already given her all the Tylenol and Motrin that she can have. At least she made it through the night without puking, even if we did all start the day at 6 after being up 5 times the night before.

So we got up and put the kids in the tub. The one was perky and happy from a good night's sleep the other one was looking like oatmeal with purple circles around her eyes. I took the little guy out and then went to work washing the hair of the sick one. I turned around when I heard, "uh oh." He had pooped on the step stool and then walked through it. Awesome. After breakfast I sat her down on the sofa and went up to take my shower.

My little buddy went up with me. Mid shower he slipped and I heard a pretty solid thunk on the side of the tub. I opened the curtain and both hands were covered in blood. So there I was naked and wet trying to figure out where the blood was coming from. Turns out he hit his chin.

I didn't want to take him to the ER along with another sick child if I didn't have to so I called up any friends I could think of whose husbands were still home at that time of the morning. Our friend Rich was home. I bundled the sick one and the bleeding one and brought them over to our friend's house and he said it wasn't deep enough to need stitches but that gluing it shut was a good idea. So I held Greg tight while Rich glued it shut.

We're home now and it's 10 AM and I hope we're done with drama for the day.

Introducing:

My Aunt.

She's super funny and just what I needed to read tonight.

Dan's gone again on another interview. This time on three actually. He's driving from St. Louis to Columbus, OH then to Wake Forrest, then up to Hershey Pennsylvania, then back home on Tuesday. I'm hoping that he doesn't hit any bad weather, but just in case I made him pack a loaf of home made bread (with a mixer that doesn't really like making home made bread) and a blanket. If he is stranded in a snow bank at least he can live off of that for, what, an hour?

He left me at home with two sick kids. Charlotte is right now barking out her cough from her bed. I just keep hoping that the Benadryl kicks in and she sleeps through the vomit inducing cough. If not, it'll be a long night for all of us.

But at least my aunt is funny and made me chuckle.

All Is Calm

Today I steam cleaned our cat pee rug and also the upstairs bedroom we are currently fixing. I also did laundry, cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed the upstairs landing, made snacks for the kids, cleaned the kitchen, did more laundry, cleaned the kitchen, read books, played scatterpillar scramble, made lunch, helped start creative recipe playtime, really cleaned the kitchen, more laundry, played three shell monty, lost playing candy land, made dinner, helped the little guy wake up happy by cuddling, finished dinner and cleaned the kitchen again.

Tonight I'm beat. Dan took the kids on his trip to the Home Depot to get more quarter round for the room we're fixing. Perhaps it was selfish of me, but it was super fun to sit here and listen to him try to get the two aimless wanderers out the door. He'd get one squared away and turn around to see shoes on the wrong feet on the other and by the time that was fixed the mittens on #1 were off. The other one may or may not have a complex about being left behind and thus spent most of the time hyperventilating about that possibility. It's funny to hear the same things come out of his mouth that come out of mine when trying to get them out the door.

See? It isn't just me.

Almost 4

Have I yet mentioned that having an almost 4 year old in the house is pretty much delightful? She is so smart and yet still mispronounces enough to make life really funny. My most recent favorite is that she can't remember what her humidifier is called so she decided that pacifier is close enough.

Also Dan's favorite is what she says when referring to mixing up frozen concentrate of orange juice. When she does that she has to "chunk the junk."

Tis The Season

Tonight Dan is on his way home from Nebraska. He interviewed there today. So I sit in this drafty old house, feeling the cold wind rush through the front door (something we'll get around to fixing one of these days) and think about interview season. That is what our lives revolve around right now. We are in interview season and everything else seems to have, well not taken a back seat really, but changed somehow, to accommodate. Christmas seems to be tucked in between Penn State and The University of Washington.

My husband is so smart and capable. I have no doubt in my mind about his ability to accomplish his goals. The Lord has truly blessed him with his skills and also an understanding of the lifestyle commitments that will come along with being a good doctor. It is something that takes a special type of service. I am only coming to realize how perfectly he will fit into his career as our lives unfold. What I am learning about him, he already knows.

That peace and confidence seems to pervade him through this whole process and I so admire it. He finds joy in the successes of his fellow classmates, even when he experiences set backs. That humility and faith, to me, has been the most precious lesson of this season in our lives.

Has this experience been quite so emotional and humbling for anyone else? I feel that questions enter my head that create conflicting desires on an almost daily basis. What if he gets an interview there? What if he doesn't? What if we end up living there? How can I help to support him and prepare our family for what is completely unknown to me? Part of me can't wait to unfurl the sails and speed into the next phase and the other wants to drop anchor and stay in this beautiful moment in our lives.

I have also learned of my own areas that require improvement. I keep desiring for the faith to let the Lord direct our lives. I suppose faith or no He's doing the directing anyway. My faith must then be that if we do our part He will bring to pass what will be for our good. On top of that I must have the humility to stop worrying about anyone else. There are so very many good things that can happen for us no matter where we end up.

What a very wonderful and rich season of our lives.

Something to Laugh About

Here's the best Halloween picture we could get of the two kids this year.

Dancer and Prancer

For your viewing pleasure. I thought you'd all like this.

Happy Tree Day!

My mom invented Tree Day. It's the day after Thanksgiving. You put up the tree and all Christmas decorations. In her version of tree day all those who help "celebrate" the day also receive periodic presents, or what I like to refer to as bribes. Charlotte and Greg were over the moon just to be able to help put the decorations up so there were no "presents" needed. In the above photo there was no possible way I was going to get Charlotte to actually look happy and serious so I just took the photo when Greg looked good.

The favorite decoration that was put up was either rosie the reindeer if you ask Charlotte or the snap-on van Christmas lights that were hung on their mirror. This year we found out that we really need a whole lot more trucks and cars associated with the holiday. He loves the Polar Express because there are lots of trains and a picture of a truck in it. Charlotte and Greg both love the scratch n sniff book as well.

Greg's Christmas sweater vest that my mom bought last year still fits him. When I had him try it on to see if it would still fit he wanted to immediately take it off until I pointed out to him that there was a truck and a Christmas tree on the front. Then he made us let him wear it for the rest of the day.

Charlotte has decided that her role in life is to be our Christmas dj. She set up all the cd's on the secretary and periodically changes them on an as needed basis. She also adds Christmas cheer by dancing to the songs she puts on. I can already tell this Christmas is going to be so much more fun than we've had yet.

More To Remember

Yesterday as I was getting out of the shower I overheard Daddy explain to Charlotte, "I don't think you're going to get to see a cadaver, even when you're old enough for kindergarten."

Also this week Greg has decided that he's too big for a high chair, but not at breakfast. He sits in it at breakfast, but then on two text books on a regular chair for all other meals.

Also, he says, "sa-la" for Charlotte. And "da-doh" for Daniel. And "done."

Little Known Fact

Daniel LOVES Christmas music.

So does Charlotte.

My favorite is riding in the car listening to my husband and then half a second later my daughter sing about the most wonderful time of the year.

They make it really easy to believe that song.

A Letter of Thanksgiving

Did I remember to tell you how much I love you? And not only that, how much I deeply appreciate all the love you have given me?

If I didn't, I do.

Did I remember to thank you for all your sleepless nights-listening to me cry, cough, or puke too many times to count?

If I didn't, thank you.

Did I remember to let you know how much it means to me that you were there to answer the funny, tough, and constant questions of my youth?

If I didn't, it counts.

Did I remember to tell you that I see your sacrifices for me? Even those that you make today?

If I didn't, I do.

Did I remember to tell you thank you for fighting the uphill fight in laundry, dishes, and cleaning that could have dragged us all down?

If I didn't, thank you.

Did I remember to show you how proud I am that you are my mom?

If I didn't, I am.


Mom, you are so precious to me. I love you as my mentor, my friend and my mom. I hope that I can be for my children what you already are for me. Thank you.

All my love,
Me

Cool Kid Stuff

My son is talking now. A sampling of his words:

• Ni-ni for night night
• lion
• Dan
• bow for bowl
• hel for help which happens about a billion times a day

It's pretty awesome. He also answers our questions appropriately. Are you hungry? Do you want food? Are you cold? The only one he doesn't answer reliably is are you poopy? Then he just runs away from you. Every time.

Charlotte is also doing some pretty awesome stuff. She "reads" books to her little brother. She also is figuring out the rules of life. The other day she saw someone run a red light and she says, "They can't do that! That's illegal!" To which I had to laugh because I had no idea that she knew the word illegal much less the meaning. Having an almost four year old is so much fun.

It's A Good Thing They've Got Two Of Us

Today was a pretty selfish day.

I was feeling pretty guilty while making dinner tonight because I was realizing how little time I actually spent connecting with my kids today. It wouldn't have been so bad if there were a good reason. Like if Charlotte had been at joy school and Greg and I had run tons of errands.

But no. Today was not that day.

It started out promising with a trip to the zoo, but then unravelled somewhere around lunchtime. Today was a no name do nothing day. Sometimes those are good days. But not today.

Charlotte was sassy at dinner. I think because she didn't get enough love and attention today.

After dinner I left Dan downstairs with Charlotte to do dishes while I took Greg to put clean sheets on the beds and put folded laundry away. I listened to Dan talking to Charlotte. She had found her reading lesson book that I had shelved and stopped doing a while back. She asked him to help her with it when he was done.

When Charlotte's bed was made I started in on ours and listened to him help her with the sounds of the letters that built words. The sounds she had learned before and then forgotten in my lack of follow through. Greg had drifted down to see what the action was and he was helping her and letting him climb on him.

Everyday its great they have a daddy, but especially today. Today he gave the kids exactly what they needed. Then I read them stories until it was time to read scriptures, put on jammies, brush teeth and tuck them into bed. This was the calmest bedtime we've had in this house for a long time. It was all because of Dad.

Default Mode

The weekend before last we had a family movie night. We moved the coffee table and blew up the air matress and rented Toy Story 3 from redbox. Charlotte was enraptured. This was really her first introduction to the land of Toy Story and she loved it. I'm thinking it was perhaps ill timed to show her a movie about the evils of throwing away old toys right before the anual get rid of excess toys before Christmas comes. Can't do anything about that now.

Remember the part where Buzz is re-programed to his factory default settings? My son has factory default settings. They are as follows: Wake up time should be sometime between 5:30 and 6:30 but absolutely no latter than that! Nap time should last no longer than an hour and a half. There will be mandatory cuddle time after naptime for at least an hour. If these are not met, there will be hell to pay.

We worked and we worked and we worked to get him to sleep in a little later in the mornings. I have no problem with waking up between 6:45 and 7. But when my alarm starts at 5:30 I'm not even happy until 7:30. Also, if he's waking up from his nap still tired he clearly needs to go back to sleep.

Last summer we finally had him sleeping until 7 and taking a good 2 hour nap. It was awesome. Then we went on a two month vacation. I decided to do anything and everything I could to survive and not wake all our guests up in whatever place we were in. Do you know what that did? That reprogrammed him to his factory settings. Now it doesn't matter what I do he sleeps when he will sleep and I can't possibly tell him any different.

We've been home for almost a month now and he's still on default mode.

When Gratitude Backfires

On Saturday afternoon I made cream of carrot soup with sandwiches for lunch. I love the soup, but it's not really one of Charlotte's favorites. We ended up getting her to eat it by putting many goldfish crackers in the soup. While eating the crackers she ate the soup.

At dinner we had Chili. It was Charlotte's turn to pray. Before she started we reminded her include the things she's thankful for. (To go along with our month long celebration.) This is how part of the prayer went:

"Dear Heavenly Father, thank you that there is no carrots in the soup for dinner."

Well, at least she's grateful for something right?

Not A Baby Anymore

I woke up about 10 minutes before the kids a few days ago. I lay there in bed and enjoyed the stillness. The soft yellow light of the rising sun was coming in filtered by the blind. I heard the garbage truck going down our alley, the two wonderful dogs that belong to our neighbors, and even a few birds ready for the day. Then through all that I heard the shuffle-shuffle of bare feet on the carpet in the kids' room. Soon there was a little body snuggled next to mine.

We got to cuddle.

I felt her warmth as she molded herself to fit as snugly as possible. The tickle of her curly hair that had escaped the braid as she slept was across my cheeks. The droopy eyelids of the still waking little girl were there too. We listened to the start of the day. Then we blinked and winked at each other. Our own little game to play while we were waiting for the boys to wake up. That moment was wonderful.

It lasted about five minutes.

Then I heard the "Mama!" coming from his crib. I got up and went to my baby. I brought him back to bed with us. All four of us squeezed into the queen sized bed. We snuggled and wiggled until Daddy woke up and Charlotte had to pee and Greg wanted to find a book to read. They all left me alone in the bed. Then my two kids came back into the room. They don't start the day without Mama if they can help it.

For a moment my two little babies stood in the doorway and it hit me. They're not babies anymore. There are no traces of baby even left in Charlotte. And only a few hints of them in Greg. I have no baby right now. I have a preschooler and a toddler.

I love them more today than I have ever before.

The Thankful Game

You guys this was probably the most successful game ever. I got the idea from the Disney Family Fun magazine and I thought it would never work, but it totally did. Here's how to play

1. Get a large-ish dish towel for everyone playing.
2. Chose a person to be "it"
3. All others must roam the house to find a pretend present for the "it" person
4. Pretend wrap the present with the dish towel
5. Give it to the "it" person
6. That person unwraps pretend present and must say: "Thank you." and also something that they love about that present.
7. Repeat with another "it" person.

This was successful because:

• Charlotte loves pretend
• Charlotte loves to get and give presents
• Mommy and Daddy have fun giving things that are totally wrong for each other just to see the "thankful" reaction.

Everyone should play this game. It was great.

Being Thankful

I didn't do anything for Thanksgiving last night. In fact I forgot even about the Thanksgiving bowl. Dan stayed late at school to attend a special meeting all about interviewing techniques for residency positions. So instead of the fish dinner I had planned for the evening we had Charlotte's choice. Waffles.

After the waffles I took the kids upstairs for a bath. I let them bathe for over half an hour before I got them out. After everyone was cleaned and teeth brushed and jammies on the three of us went into what used to be my bedroom, but is currently a completely empty room. We're fixing that room next so we had to clear it out.

What is so magical about an empty room? I'm not sure why it has such appeal, but my kids and I have loved it. They have run and run and run in that room and Dan and I have sat and watched and laughed and clapped. Last night I laid on the floor of the empty room and the kids laid on top of me and around me and next to me. We did nothing but cuddle, touch and tumble for a good 20 minutes.

That was perfection. I feel so much love for my kids. They are what I'm grateful for. I sat and listened to their thoughts and ideas and just loved them.

My dearest little Gregory. You are so sweet and smart. I love how even tempered you are. Even though you are certainly a rambuncous little boy you seldom get really truly angry. I love how you climb and tumble and crawl all over me. I also love the funny faces you make just to be funny. You are a joy to my life and I love sharing my time with you.

My darling Charlotte I love you. I love that you always want to cuddle me because you are so much fun to cuddle. I know someday you wont want to do that with me anymore, but I hope that day doesn't come for a long time. You are so grown up and it shows. Last night you made me laugh because you wanted to. It was the first time you have specifically done something to make me laugh that perfectly tickled my funny bone. Last night was fun.

Last night was what motherhood is all about.

In other news here are the photos of the Thanksgiving celebrations.

Voting:

And the video wrap up after voting:

And here are the turkey pictures we colored as a family. Would you call this a flock of turkeys?

Also Dan currently has 8 interview invitations now.

A Swing and A Miss

Yesterday's Thanksgiving activity was actually not all that Thanksgiving-y. I sat the kids down and talked about how thankful I am to be living on our country and about the opportunities we get to have because we live where we do. Then I talked about one way of showing our thanks is to vote for our leaders. And then we went down to vote.

Yep day two was voting.

I thought that they had gotten the idea pretty well so I ventured to take a video of Charlotte after the thing was over. Turns out that she's way more grateful for the evergreen tree that was behind her in the video than she is about our country and voting. Oh well. At least I voted, the kids got to receive stickers and look at the little birds that were the pets at our polling place (a nursing home). Perhaps today will be all about making Thanksgiving decorations? This is a bit trickier than I thought it would be.



In other news. In case you wanted to know Dan now has five interview invites, which is very promising.

BINGO

Things never go quite like what I plan as a mother. I had planned that we would all sit down and I tell my kids about gratitude and then they say, "Oh mother! Now we understand how truly blessed we are and we wont take anything we have or anything you do for us for granted."

HA!

But, all things considered our kick off night went fairly well. Dan said it was a good idea and supported the month long celebration whole heartedly, which is always a great help. I took no photos during the lesson and games, but here are a few snapshots of the bingo cards.

As you can tell, I draw stick figures.

Also here's a shot of our Thanksgiving bowl. The four or five little glass tokens in there will soon be joined by others throughout the month.

So happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Gratitude

Somewhere along the line my daughter has picked up a pretty bad case of wanting everything she sees. I'm thinking it is a combination of age, inability to see through advertising and spending two months with family where she gets to have more things than she normally does. Either way I was laying awake in bed last night mulling this problem over. I hear several times a day about how she wants this or that. Today we were at the grocery store and she was whining for candy. She was wanting candy the day after Halloween! and just two days after we went trunk or treating. She's up to her eyeballs in candy at home but she wants more at the store.

So here's my new plan: I've decided that we need to celebrate Thanksgiving the whole month. People do things to celebrate Christmas for the whole month so we're going to do that for Thanksgiving. The only problem now is finding activities that cultivate gratitude and are fun for everyone.

We're kicking things off tonight at family night with Thanksgiving bingo. Charlotte loves bingo so I'm going to find or make bingo cards with pictures of things our family is grateful for. Things like family, trucks (you know for Greg), the gospel, our kids stuffed dogs, being healthy and other things. I haven't thought of all of them yet as you can see.

Also, I've decided to try to bring thankfulness to dinner. Each night we are going to take turns to say things we are grateful for during that day. With each thing we are grateful for we are going to take a glass bead I bought at the dollar store and fill up a glass bowl that my friend Natalie gave me. I figure at this rate the bowl should be full by the time Thanksgiving comes. Hopefully it turns out. I'll let you know.

Now comes your turn. Are there any activities that your family does or ideas that you want your family to do to celebrate Thanksgiving and gratitude? All help and ideas are welcome. And for all the help you give me I want to thank you, in advance.

Real Estate

Before I talk about Dan's latest obsession I just wanted to tell you all a little story. The whole family briefly went to Target on Saturday while trying to kill some time. We naturally went to the toy aisle where I frequently let the kids wander and look. I tell them its like the library. We just enjoy the toys while they're there and then we leave them there for other kids to enjoy. Charlotte went through every single box of Disney toys and Barbies. Every box. Because maybe that box three back contains something different and she needs to make sure that she sees it all. The zhu zhu pets were on an end cap and I was pointing them out to Dan. Charlotte walks up and says, "What are these?" Not even a week after I finally admit that she loves them she's forgotten. Perhaps next time I want her to stop doing something I just need to blog about it.

Anyway, Dan's new focus is on wait for it, wait for it, you're going to be shocked.......residency locations. Specifically about real estate in each location. Every time a hint of a viable interview invite comes in I could bet money he'll be on the computer later checking about what kinds of houses are on the market in that city and how close or far we'd be from the hospital.

It is daunting and overwhelming. Some places we could get so much home for the money. And other places, well......maybe we should just get rid of half our stuff now. Did you want a kid anyone? Mine apparently take up too much space. We might only have room for one.

And why is it that this move seems to be so much a bigger deal than the last one? I knew nothing about St. Louis before we moved here and now I love it. I could like Siberia right? What about the Wasatch front? It's got perks right?

In the mean time we've got a house to finish working on.

New Obsessions

I got My Big Truck Book from a couple of friends at my baby shower with Greg. It's a big board book with photos of different trucks and each photo is labeled. I put it on the shelf and did nothing with it. That is until yesterday when Greg happened upon it. Since then I swear I have read it 42 times. Since yesterday. He carries that thing around with him in the hopes that someone will read it to him at any moment.

Also, when all the mail that we had a hold on was delivered yesterday the Hanna Anderson catalog also came. My mother in law always buys pajamas from them for Halloween and Christmas and we are always looking forward to those jammies. We also look forward to "window shopping" the catalog every time it comes. I swear there isn't a page in that thing that I don't like. Right now I'm loving the pilot cap and mittens and also pretty much every single sweater romper for little boys. If you don't get this catalog you are seriously missing out on looking at cute stuff.

And finally Charlotte is now thorougly obsessed with Dinsey. I would say Disney princess, but they also have Tinkerbell and though not really a princess she is a favorite at our house. All day long I hear about her being Snow White for Halloween and how next Halloween she wants to be any one of the other princesses or Tinkerbell. They're all on rotation.

Also, Charlotte saw a commercial for Zhu zhu pets sometime last summer and has not let up about wanting one for Christmas. When she first saw them I thought the desire would fade in a week. It has not. I can not for the life of me figure out why she would want a zhu zhu pet, but she does. She points them out at the stores, she brings them up in conversation. Is it something about being three that makes you a little more prone to obsessions? I'm just shocked is all.

Nothing But The Best

We've now been at my brother-in-law's house for about a week now and my children are in cousin heaven. I don't think I could over state this enough. My children think they are rock stars. Highlights of the week include:

• The teen-ager picking up Greg and tossing him on the sofa while Greg is hysterically laughing. Over and over and over.
• My kids waving to the elementary school kids as they wait for the bus and Greg yelling out Bubba! Bubba! Bubba! over and over hoping that would make him decide to stay home and play with him all day long
• Charlotte's never ending pretend games with her new best friend. They have played puppies, princesses, spider family, and a whole slew of other games.
• Greg's eyes lighting up every time he sees his uncle.

There have been so very many small miracles this past week, but they are too hard to write down. What wonderful memories.

Comparisons

This has been such a wonderful trip so far. Unfortunately I feel a little under the weather. I really don't want to make my grandparents solely watch their grandchildren, but they have seemed up to the task. Tonight I talked to Dan a little early because he got off work early and I just decided that I missed him too much and needed to see him. I packed the kids into the car at 6 and headed up to SLC. It took us an hour through pretty heavy traffic, but was totally worth it for the reaction the two of them had when I turned the last corner and they saw their father. He is so wonderful and we miss him so much.

We spent an hour with him. He took us up to the children's hospital where he's been working the past two weeks. He ate dinner and we decided to spill two cups of hot chocolate all over the table. This little adventure was sort of a wake up call for me because I realized that even with having to parent two children and living out of suit cases and this horrible cold that will not go away like I want it too, I've still got it better than he does. He, of course, would never complain, but I could tell how bone tired he was. And tonight he's sleeping in his car because his housing for this trip seems to be one disaster after another. Don't worry, he's got a place to stay post call on Saturday. He still has two weeks left to impress people there and I'm not sure how he's going to get the reserves to do it. He is an amazingly hard worker and I admire him so very much.

Every Time

What is it about Denver that gets my kids sick? Since we're on vacation I'm spending much more time with my face inches from theirs too so of course I'm also sick. It's only a small cold, but it is annoying.

Other than that Denver was awesome. On Saturday Garrett and I took the kids up the canyon to see Tiny Town. A very strange sort of attraction for people to go see, but my kids loved it. Charlotte loves doll houses so this was right up her alley.

On Monday Katie took my kids to the Children's Museum, even though she had a stomach ache. She's that kind of Aunt. Awesome. I stayed home drinking fluids to make me pee and then dreading the actual peeing. But by the end of Monday I was feeling much better.

On Tuesday Greg fell asleep on the sofa at 9 AM and I knew the day would be rocky. I ended up taking the kids on a death march to the park only to play for about 15 minutes so we would have enough time to walk back. What sort of mother consciously decides to NOT take a stroller on said walk? Me apparently. After that the day perked up somewhat because we went up to Uncle Garrett's work where he did brain wave testing on the kids. They did their small part to help children with difficult to help hearing loss. And also they got a slinky and a bouncy ball. What part of that could be bad?

Like I said before my days are sort of blurring together. Here it isn't even one week later and Wednesday-Friday are a bit of a jumble. During those days we went to the botanical gardens. They have a new kids garden on the roof of their parking garage that is awesome. Greg loved digging in the digging area and Charlotte loved wading in the stream. Then Katie and I got to push them around the rest of the gardens in the stroller. We also had a blast rolling down this big grassy hill area they built and wrestling on the grass. I got pretty burnt there. We also went to the zoo which was totally fun. Just before we left we each got a frozen treat. The kids got ice cream cones, Katie got a root beer float and I got a shaved ice. By the end of our frozen treat time both kids had their shirts off and all four of us were covered in frozen treat. I'm also forgetting something that we did during this time, but I'm blaming it on the sinus pressure building in my skull.

On Saturday we watched the morning session of conference and then ate lunch so that we could be ready for the circus. The circus was pretty much amazing. The only unfortunate part of the whole experience was that Charlotte was already sick at that point so she was a bit whiny. Then she decided to take about a 40 minute nap on my lap. Oh well, at least I wasn't holding the squirming one (sorry Garrett).

Now we are in Utah visiting the great grandparents. They seem pretty tickled with the kids. I can't get over how healthy my grandparents are. All I can remember of the one great grandparent that survived long enough for me to remember is that she sat in her chair and by the end of the day the shoes she had put on in the morning no longer fit her feet. These great grandparents roll around on the floor and pick them up and tickle and do ever so many things. My kids are so very blessed to have them around.

Lost Track of Time

Spending most of my days self planned and being flexible to my kids needs I tend to lose track of time. Not only that sometimes I lose track of what day of the week it is. I think that's fairly common. I battle this with structuring my days and weeks so that things come at predictable times. Again, fairly common.

These vacations however are gloriously unstructured. They are filled with things that we want to do and few things that we don't. The off shoot of that is that I have completely lost track of the time I'm spending here. Not only do I not know what time of day it is, I usually can't remember what day of the week. Then today I couldn't even remember what month we are in. Which makes it really hard to figure out how many months old my child is.

I just wish he were old enough for nursery.

Blazing Good Time

Nothing says super fun vacation like a bladder infection that wakes you up at 4 AM.

Katie: Can't you just drink some cranberry juice?

Me: No.

Vacation Again

So we are now in Denver. We're visiting my sister and then visiting family all around northern Utah for the next month while Dan does a rotation in Salt Lake. I hope it goes well. I hope it goes as well as our vacation seems to be going at Aunt Katie and Uncle Garrett's house. They are ever so gracious hosts.

The big news for me so far is that I drove from St. Louis to Denver. Half of Kansas was driving rain and we had to go 40 mph and it was scary. Also we were driving until 2:30 or 3:30 if you count from our original time zone. Considering everything we did really well.

Here's hoping that this month of living out of our bags goes as well as last month.

Must Love Books

What do you think it says about me that I can rattle off my library card number at the drop of a hat and yet, for the life of me, can not seem to manage to correctly remember my checking account number? I have to look it up every time I go to the bank.

I Fall To Pieces

We flew home. Was it just yesterday? Yes, I think it was. And you know the most wonderful thing happened on the flight....nothing. It wasn't amazingly good, but it sure wasn't amazingly bad. And also my son has a super-power. He makes old men happy. Ridiculously happy. Happy enough that they stopped us to tell us goodbye when we passed them on our way to get the our bags. Multiple men. It was funny.

So there are the three of us. I'm the Sherpa carrying bags and stuffed dogs and a buffalo that turns into a blanket and pushing the stroller. Charlotte spies the restaurants and says we should really stop for dinner because she's "so so so so so so hungry," and Greg is wanting to get out and run his little self around and my answer to everything is, "Just wait until we get to Daddy." I keep telling myself I just need to hold it together until then. My mental outlook was much like what I had on the way to the hospital giving birth to Charlotte. Just get to the end point and then you can relax, knowing things are taken care of. (Oh how naive I was then.)

We were wandering around baggage claim and I couldn't even find where our bags were supposed to be coming out at and I looked around for familiar faces and I couldn't see the people who were on our flight and I'm tired. And then, in an instant, things changed. Daddy was standing in front of us. And I had butterflies in my stomach because I'm reminded of the times I flew to see him while we were engaged. And I ran and hugged him. Then Charlotte tore out of the stroller and ran and hugged him. Greg was a bit concerned about being left alone buckled into the stroller until he saw Daddy. He started attempting to tear the straps and buckles apart to get to Daddy.

It was like when Dan took all the pieces of luggage I was trying to carry and hold together I also let go of all the little emotional pieces that were being held together by my last energies as a mother. He makes our family whole and we're blessed to have him with us.

Daniel spent the rest of the night carrying both children who would not let go of him. It just made my heart happy to see how much they love him and how they missed him. Greg just cuddled himself right onto Dan's shoulder and stayed there as long as he could. We are sure happy to have him home.

Hard Hitting News

I desperately wanted to post a photo or two but managed to forget my all the necessary tools needed to transfer photos from my camera to the computer. So you'll have to use your imagination.

Our vacation is going well. We've had a lot of time to relax. But one point that didn't go well was my very first trip to the ER with my child. Greg fell in Nordstrom and hit his head on the tile floor. It had an amazing amount of blood that came gushing from the wound and all I could think was we need to get him to the doctor. So I started saying (my mom says I was yelling) we need to leave now. That was the only thing I could think to say. My mom told me to take him to the bathroom. I managed to carry him across the floor to the bathroom and not get any blood on my white pants or new jacket. I had him pretty calmed down while my shaking hands were holding paper towels to his head. I was just thinking wait for help which I was sure my mother would bring. To my surprise Nordstrom has a medical response unit which arrived in less than a minute. The lady came in and started to get his head to stop bleeding.

At that point, knowing someone else was helping him, I sort of lost it and started to hyperventilate maybe because the lady told me I had to go sit on the sofa in the lounge. That helped me, but freaked Greggie out. He started to kick and scream as hard as possible. Knowing we'd have to take him somewhere to be fixed I called my father in law (a surgeon) and asked him what to do. He called ahead to the urgent care and told me to take him there.

We ended up taking him from urgent care to the pediatric ER in a nearby hospital. He was amazingly good and sat very still while everyone inspected his wound. Then they gave him a topical anesthetic and conscious sedation and then he got really loopy and everything he did was hilarious. He was fine until they had to drape the wound with a sterile cloth. That he hated and also the anesthetic they injected into the site. He started to get mad. The funny part was when the male medical assistant came in to give the doctor something, Greg calmed somewhat to his voice. They made the guy stay in the room and told him to talk. He didn't know what to say so they had him sing a song. The only song the guy knew was the theme song to the Love Boat. So there we are Greg getting his wound irrigated and they guy singing the Love Boat, until that failed to work anymore and they let the guy leave.

Four hours after the initial injury Greg emerged from the pediatric ER with one stitch below the skin and six stitches across the top.

You'd think that would slow him down and make him a little more cautious.

And you'd be wrong.

Best Self Photo Ever

Charlotte it turning into quite the photographer. Here's her self portrait. And here's the little beuaty she took of me the other day. Is this really what I look like to my children?
Oh well, I thought it was funny.

Stories to Tell Dan (When I see him again)

Two days ago Charlotte picked out a cute little shirt that her Aunt Rachael gave to her. It's a white button up shirt with thin purple stripes. She put it on all by herself and was very proud of the outfit she was wearing. She turned to me and said, "I look like Daddy!" And I suppose she did.

Yesterday as we were in the car Charlotte asked me, "Why does Daddy sleep at the hospital now?" I thought that was funny.

The Destroyer

My son makes messes faster than I can clean them up. Not little messes either. Messes like pooping on the floor and walking through it. Messes like emptying an entire sippy cup of juice on my comforter. And messes like destroying his crib.

I'm sure you're wondering what I'm talking about when I say he is destroying his crib. I mean he's eating it. You know how a lot of kids chew on the top bar of their crib when they're teething? My son started when he was getting his first teeth, and hasnt' stopped. He has literally chewed pieces off the top of his crib. It sort of blows my mind that he is eating his crib. Clearly we're going to have to sand the rail down and restain it for the next child, but what do I do in the meantime?

A Very Very Very Fine House

I was waiting to post photos of all our work until it was done and everything was clean. What a joke. I decided to stop waiting and just post them.

First the best before photo I could find:

As you can see the walls were peach with dark green above the chair rail. The wood was partially stripped. What you can't see is that the wall was in despirate need of resurfacing. I also didn't have a very good before photo of the bench, which was beautiful, but also partially stripped. Here's the new view as you come in the front door.


We repainted the wall a much better green. The first green we painted was beautiful, but matched nothing else in our house. This looks much better. We also stripped, stained, painted, and put down a carpet runner on the stairs.

We also installed this new hall light. Previously this hall had a gross pull string light. Now it has this little beauty that we got on clearance at Lowe's. I enjoy the area so very much now. All that is left are the details and decorating it. I hope you enjoyed the update. I sure did.

Feeling Bad For Him

Yesterday Dan woke up at 4 AM, ate breakfast by 4:30 and was out of the house by 4:45.

He was in the OR most of the day. He didn't make it home until 6:30 PM. At which point he ate dinner, his second meal for the day. He was so wiped out that he just laid on the floor at the top of the landing until it was time to put the kids to bed. I assumed he'd be going to bed at the same time.

He probably thought so too.

At 8 PM one of the women in our ward called us frantically searching for people to help her husband move them from their current apartment into their new place. They had to be out of the place that night and nobody had shown up to help.

Dan wasn't home until 10 PM.

He said he needed some water so he sat in the kitchen while I did dishes and talked his head right off. He is so patient and loving and hard working.

He's superman.

As a little pick-me-up I showed him the video of Greg dancing at the concert we went to a few weeks ago. I can't figure out how to flip the video so you'll have to tilt your head.

I think he's got some pretty awesome moves.

Patience

For the past two months or so James 1:2-4 has been circling my brain.

"My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing."

I guess it comes as no real surprise that I've been trying to work on having patience this time as well. I've been getting so upset at the crying, screaming, lonely days I've been living with the toddlers of the house and just wishing I had the self control to not be so frustrated. Because I do love what I'm doing. I love this wonderful life I have and my amazing kids. There isn't a day that passes where I'm not amazed at their lovely beings. Over and over to myself I've been thinking what is it that I'm missing? what am I not seeing here that is preventing me from being more patient with my kids, myself, my husband, and my situation? What part of my faith is being worked on?



On Sunday I was particularly focused (or shall I say nervous) about the upcoming three moths where Dan will, for all intents and purposes, be gone from our family. I was worried about trying to be on top of everything all on my own and how I don't really think I can do that. Then that scripture came again to my mind. Only this time I realized something. I don't know if it really connects to this verse, but it whispered peace to me.



I realized that patience is such a Godly trait. He has so much patience with me. These months he has not been trying to tell me to be patient with my progress, with what I'm doing, but to be patient with my children. Something, my very wonderful sister-in-law said to me while they were here on spring break in April came to me as well. She said, in essence, its hard for moms to not think of their first child as a little adult. How often I have thought of my children as little adults, getting frustrated with how much they blow things out of proportion. Of course the color of the Popsicle is important to you. Of course you care if you get to wear that shirt backwards. What the Lord wants for me is to see that. And to settle into it.



It came to me that in order for me to be where I want to be, to be patient and to have a loving home I needed to sacrifice something. I need to be able to stand back and sacrifice my control of the daily situations. In order for me to lead my family the way I want them to be led I need to focus more on serving my family and taking the time to listen to them. Because when I do I am blown away by the things that I learn from them. What a wonderful blessing it is to be a mom.

Mean Girls

My daughter has figured out the power of words. Specifically mean words. It's so disheartening to hear her say calculated things to get a reaction out of her friends. After one loooong week of trying "discipline" her about it I finally just sat down and talked with her about it on Saturday. At church on Sunday I asked the nursery leaders to keep their ears open and notify me if anything was said and then again at playgroup today and they said she was great. Hopefully that little streak was broken. It just makes me sad for the time, which I know will happen, when she's the recipient of that sort of behavior. Hopefully that isn't any time too soon.

Turning Around

Maybe I'm getting old (which compared to the 3 and 1 year olds I spend my day with isn't that far off). Maybe it's the passing of a good friend whom I really should have kept in touch with better. Confession: I thought seriously about calling her the week before she passed not even knowing her health was failing and then blew it off. Maybe it was hearing another good friend from high school is pursuing a career that I think is perfectly suited to her. I don't know what it is, but lately I've been feeling like I really want to gather all my old friends around me. Not just to check up on their facebook status or the random email here and there, but really truly talk to them face to face. And I'm not longing for a high school reunion because honestly besides a handful of very wonderful people I don't really care about much of what happened to the graduating class of 2002. But there are a whole lot of people from the town I grew up in that I'd love to see again. To meet their spouse and children if they have them and to see what they're up to. I want to see them all having success and being wildly happy. I have in my mind that they all are, but honestly who knows?

And it isn't just from my home town. I would love to see how some of the people I went to college with are doing. I would love to go to lunch with them and ask them about the things they are passionate about. The things that keep them going.

Probably I'm being overly romantic about things and logistically insane but wouldn't it be nice if you could gather those people up together and just get a chance to see what they're up to? To say the things you perhaps should have, and the things you hope they are doing, and wish them the success you hope they are having.

Anyway that's what I've been thinking about on this very rainy St. Louis day.

Warning

I just thought I'd tell everyone that just for today, I hate medical school. And also I hate the green color we painted the front room. It's putting me in a bad mood. So it would probably be best if you just stayed away.

Tomorrow things will be different. I promise.

I'm not Dead

It's just that our computer is. Our laptop screen got broken so we took it in to get it fixed. I took it in July 1st and we still don't have it back. They ordered a new screen and when it arrived it was cracked. So then they told me they were waiting for a new one. I called them yesterday and they said the company they ordered the first one from is being obstinate about sending them another one so it looks like they'll just have to eat the cost of that one. Translation to me: there isn't even another screen on the way right now. I'm just about ready to screem. On the plus side we do have our old laptop, but it is really unreliable so I'm not even sure this will post. In fact I've tried to post a small explination three times since July first and my laptop hates me. So hopefully you will all be able to read this.

On the other bright side Dan and I have nearly killed ourselves trying to resurface the walls of our entryway, hallway, stairwell, and upstairs landing all in one week. I can honestly say that I have put my blood sweat and tears into this project. Tonight we finally got to start painting. I'm getting pretty excited for the results. Photos to come. Well, maybe photos to come. We'll have to see.

Happy Father's Day

Did you celebrate Father's Day in your house? We did in ours and this is what we did:

• Ate a nice hot breakfast consisting of oatmeal, with goodies added for those who like that kind of thing, courtesy of Dan.
• Did the breakfast dishes while Dan sanded the stairs and other woodwork.
• Played with the kids while Dan did more sanding.
• Got ready for church while Dan sanded.
• Let Dan get Greg ready for church because who doesn't love trying to get a sleepy baby ready for church?
• Let Dan have Greg for the thrid hour of church because who doesn't love trying to entertain a sleepy hungry baby while in public?
• Made chicken salad for dinner and let Dan accompany that with grilled pineapple (yum!) and baked beans. Thanks Dan.

We just like to make sure he knows how important he is around here. Happy Father's Day!

My Boy

How you've grown! I know it's not a birthday or anything big like that, but I looked at you today and just burst out with love for you so I thought I'd let you know. Which I did in the moment with hugs, kisses, tickles and laughs. And which I will do now so you can read later.

Once you started walking you also decided it was high time you let us know what you were thinking as well. My favorite is whenever you see a ball you run to it pick it up and yell, "tatch!" then you throw it impossibly low so that nobody will be able to catch it. Sometimes there's nobody even around to catch the ball. You just love the ball.

I also love how you stick out your bottom lip. Mostly when you don't want to eat something (which is quite often right now). And that you raise your eyebrows and point your chin at whomever you wish to be talking to.

You are also learning the names for everything these days. You are always pointing and asking, "as dat" which means what's that. Though you can't yet form the words for everything, I'm sure you're learning them very quickly.

Also, you tell jokes. You sister used to do this too. You sit in your car seat and babble and then laugh and laugh like that was the funniest thing you've ever heard. You are such an amazingly great kid and I love you so much.

I feel so blessed to be your mother. There are so many things you want to be doing these days and so many things you are doing. You have taught me that I can love and love and love and there is no limit to it. You are my big boy now. Off to see the world and I'm lucky that I get to be along for the ride. Drive on little guy.

Love,
Momma

Please Support

Hey Everyone,
I know I don't have the largest following out there, but I wanted to direct everyone's attention to my friend Dana. She is an interior designer and has started a group around these parts where we get together once a month and re-design a room or part of a room in a member's house. It was my turn this last month and we decorated my living room. I thought there wasn't anything that could really be done, but boy was I wrong. I love the way it looks. I'm not posting photos quite yet because I decided to do a little more painting of my coffee table. Then I'll post photos.

Back to Dana, she's trying to get onto OWN and she needs votes. So please go over there and vote for her.

Thanks.

Falling To Pieces

Things that have broken in our house since Mother's Day:

• digital camera-with some help from a three year old.
• portable DVD player- good thing it was still under warranty.
• Vacuum cleaner- well really it just got clogged for the 4th time in 2 years and I was fed up with taking it in and spending $30-40 each time to get it fixed. We traded in for a very good used one. (And now it sounds like I went car shopping.)
• laptop screen- This feels like icing on the cake. Aren't things supposed to come in threes? This would be number four!

Dancing

Last weekend we started in on probably the most exciting project we have on our house. This project was the reason we bought the house. This was Dan's dream project. And we have taken a long time to get here. In case you were wondering we started to sand the woodwork on the stairs and built-in bench in our foyer. It is looking beautiful! Very yellow at the moment, but that will change soon. I'm so excited. And so is Dan.

The excitement level reached such heights on Saturday that we ended up having a dance party in our living room. Dan turned on Sierra Hull and we all danced around the room. We, of course, took videos of it, but there's no way Dan would be OK with me posting his dancing on here. All I want is for all of you to know that he does dance!

Wishes

This morning Charlotte woke up a little before 7 (which is just about as perfect a time as you can get in my opinion). She came into our bedroom and snuggled up to me.

We were both awake. Just laying there together. Nothing was being said. We were both enjoying the quiet of the morning.

Then I wondered if she's old enough to remember this. This perfect moment of snuggled in bliss.

She is three now.

Remember this. Please remember this wonderful feeling. You are my joy. You are sunbursts and rainbows and stars in the sky. You are why I start my day. I love you so very much.

One Last Hurrah-Sort Of

Last week we decided to celebrate the ending of our Magic House membership by going twice in one week. We stayed as long as we could before tears started and saw just about everything my children's ages would permit us. It was so much fun now that Greg could walk! I didn't have to take a stroller. Here are the photos of our last hurrah:
Charlotte climbed down the three story beanstalk-and didn't get stuck! That was a first.

Greg loved this ball toy. Put the balls in at the top and they ring some bells while falling to the bottom.

Charlotte loved to see these balls floating in the air from the jets below. Her hair is crazy in this photo because she had just been through the machine that makes your hair stand up with static electricity. (My science teachers are all cringing right now because I can't think of the name of that thing.)

Greg spent a lot of time at this wall of bubble mirrors. He thought it was very funny.

The sand table was really fun for both children. Bonus that Greg could reach it!

A great time was had by all and I was getting a little sad when we left the last time. Then yesterday I got a renewal email from the Magic House. What a wonderful gift! Thanks Grandma and Grandpa! We will love it all over again! When I told Charlotte about our membership she squealed and asked if we could go and I told her not until we get the new card.

We are very interested in the mail these days.

First of June

The first questions out of Charlotte's mouth today:

"It's June now?"

"Are Grandma and Grandpa here yet?"

She is clearly excited for any visits from familly.

Tidbits to Remember

I have a few stories I want to blog about, but after putting in a new garden today I just don't have the patience to upload the photos to the computer, then to blogger, then to write a story about them. It will come later.

What I want to do now is write down a few tidbits about how my children are now so I don't forget.

First Charlotte:

• We didn't (haven't) taken down the Happy Birthday banner from Greg's birthday. Last week she looked up at it from eating her breakfast and asked why we still have it up. I told her because I just haven't gotten to it yet. Then I asked her if she knew what it said wherein she told me, "Green H, White A, Red P, Blue P, Gold Y." I was very impressed.
• At her three year check-up she was 37 1/2" tall (25%) and weighed 33 1/2 lb (75%). What a cute little shortie.
• Charlotte makes up all sorts of pretend friends that hang around our house. This reminds me a lot of her cousin Travis and I love it.
• Charlotte is currently taking music classes at the Folk School of St. Louis for the summer. She loves them. She especially likes Sally the camel. And the egg shaker songs and games.
• Two weeks ago in the car she asks me, "Mom what does pitter patter mean?" This came out of nowhere so I gave it my best shot by saying, "It is the sound of little feet running along." Silence from the back seat, then, "Umm Mom? I think maybe it's the sound of rain maybe?" First reaction if you knew the answer then why did you ask the question? Then I realized one of the egg shaker games is the rain game where they match the volume and tempo of the teacher's guitar with their egg shakers while singing "pitter patter" until the teacher reaches the thunder and lightening.
• She loves the egg shaker games.

And now for Greg:

• At Greg's one year check-up he was 29 1/4" tall (25%) and weighed 22lb 3 oz (50%). Which means he gained about one pound from the time he was 4 months to the time he was a year. Sounds a lot like his daddy.
• When Greg walks he holds his hands above his head. Usually he is also opening and closing one of the hands.
• Greg plays with his hair. All the time. I used to think it was his ear, but now that his hair is a little thicker and longer he is always playing with it.
• One of the spindles from the banister broke a while back. It wasn't a big deal until Friday when Greg realized he could see Suzie below him through the hole and then I had to catch him by the leg before he fell. That opening is now tethered off until a more permanent solution can be found.
• Greg says, "Mama!" "DA!" "uh-oh" "Baa" (Ball) and his approximation of cracker, kitty cat, and dog.
• Tonight he also figured how to say "Mana" which is Mindy (aka his favorite person in the whole world right now).

7:25 AM

After a few weeks of having the ability to walk with zero motivation to try it Greg decided to join the world of bi-peds yesterday. It happened while I was doing my hair at 7:25 AM. He still falls down on his bum a lot, but walking is surely his favorite at the moment. You can see in his face that he's totally excited about the new trick he can do. Dan and I tried all day yesterday to get a video of it, but were totally unseccessful. Then this morning at the park...

We went to the park at 8:30 and by the time we left an hour later it was already 80 degrees!

The Pool That Daddy Bought

When it got hot here in March I wanted to buy a new pool for the kids. Dan wouldn't let me because the pools I was looking at were the small blow up kind. He said that Suzie, the cat, would pop them and we would just be wasting our money. He had a point. So I didn't buy one. We made do with storage bins with water in them as water tables. Then it got cold and it wasn't an issue.

We kept our eyes open and my friend told me they had the kind we were looking for at Walmart. We headed out and bought just exactly the pool Dan wanted. I was sure glad we had it on Saturday. Summer officially hit St. Louis with and 83 degree sunny and humid day. We spent the day out in our little pool.

Yes, the little pool has a slide! The water started out clean and clear, but there was so much re-applying of sunscreen it ended the day hazy. We emptied it.Greg kept trying to climb the slide and then slipping and face planting into the water. It didn't bother him enough to stop trying. I had to get into the pool to keep him from drowning.

Saturday was one of those magical times with my kids where life is good and you remember what it felt like to have summer last forever.