What Life Feels Like Right Now

First we find out we might not be able to buy our new house. When that gets figured out we might not be selling this house. Finally that gets figured out and our new mortgage letter isn't filed and then its found. Then the St. Louis house has a really bad inspector.

I feel like I've been hiking the house selling/buying hike. I would be able to appreciate how beautiful my surroundings are if I weren't so exhausted.

Happy Graduation

We all knew this day was coming.

At first it seemed a long time off.

Then as we approached it excitement built.

So many plans have been made and scrapped and made again.

At first I dragged my feet, but seeing my family's happiness I couldn't hold back any longer.

We are so excited to present our new doctor.

And his dog.

He spent an hour and a half in the backyard with her today.

In the rain.

With Charlotte's pink princess umbrella.

Just trying to get house training to start right.

Nothing happened.

He came back inside.

Then she peed on the kitchen floor.

I laughed.

I've potty trained before and this seems to be exactly the same.

Happy Birthday-Let's Just Make it Another Year

After Greg fell down and had to get stitches while on vacation a friend of mine told me about her son. He's Charlotte's age and has had to get stitches once a year, every year of his life. We had a good commiseratory laugh over the crazy differences between boys and girls and I secretly prayed that I would escape that.

Well today is Greg's second birthday! Hooray! We got up and had our small family party complete with pancake cake, cantaloupe, and present opening. The presents were lovely and all adored.

After the present playtime was over I got Greg dressed in his new gorilla shirt from Grandma and Grandpa and we readied ourselves for a trip to the Botanical Gardens. While I was getting my clothing out for the day Greg climbed onto my bed and was digging through the bin I had taken off the top shelf of the closet and not replaced. You see the matches for the birthday candles were in it. Also in it was all of our families medications. I heard him shaking a bottle around and turned just in time to see him having opened one of our Rx bottles and trying to put a pill into his mouth. I practically screamed, "NO!" to him and tackled him off the bed. He was understandably upset and crying. I ascertained that he didn't eat any others. Then threw the whole bottle out. Then I asked Dan about the whole thing and he said the pills were so huge there was no way he would have been able to easily and quietly swallow any of them without me knowing. Although I was shaken I kept on getting ready for the day.

After we were all dressed I went to the basement to dig out our sunscreen from after the camping trip. Greg followed me. On the landing he tripped. Then he slid head first down the stairs. I lunged for him, but wasn't able to catch him before his head smacked every step and came to a stop on the concrete floor of the basement. That trip gave him a good bump and some scrapes on the noggin and one good puffy bump right where his stitches are. Dan heard the fall and came running and ascertained that there wasn't any serious damage.

While finishing our preparations to leave I tried to put the sunscreen on Greg. I put it on my fingers and rubbed it into both hands then went for his face. I hadn't even touched him yet when he moved to avoid me and ended up hitting his eye on my sunscreen hands. There was a lot of sunscreen that made it directly into his eye. So then we had to flush his eye. He was screaming and yelling as I held him down and Dan used the spray from the sink to get it out.

It was at this point that I started crying about how my son wasn't even going to make it through his second birthday. What a pretty picture the two of us must have made for Dan. Greg, banged up, wet, and screaming and me overreacting about the whole situation. Then our friends called to tell us that the gardens were packed.

We decided to stay home, invite friends over and play in our little pool out back. That made for a much more mellow and better birthday morning.

Happy Birthday Little Man!

A Star Is Born

This happened the other week and I wasn't going to post it. Then I read my sister's blog about how she's never been on TV. So click the link and you'll see my debut on the local St. Louis TV show Great Day St. Louis.

A BIG WEEK

There weren't any posts because we went camping. We had loads of fun and I took tons of photos (so you will be happy Katie). They will come later.

The really big news happened while camping was that we accepted an offer on our house! YEAH! I think it ended up really nicely and everyone in the situation seems to be satisfied. Now we just have to make it through the inspections and closing and then we're home free.

The closing date is June 3 which is the same as ours in Minnesota.

Easter 2011

Well, even with the frustrations Easter seemed to be a success. See for yourself.

They used the Easter baskets they made with Daddy at the Home Depot. I then decided that in order to not break every egg they should be lined.

We dyed Easter eggs on Friday. Greg thought they were balls so he threw them and stepped on them. He only got to do three. Then we put his three in the decorative shrink wrap in order to have them be usable.

We also went to the SLU alumni easter egg hunt on Saturday. Unfortunately it was indoors since we were having residual rain from the tornadoes that ripped through St. Louis Friday night. Being indoors made it really cramped and I didn't get any good photos. Charlotte got her first ever face painting that we had to wash off immediately after getting home because it was making her face itchy.

Here are the Sunday dress photos. I think they both look pretty good, even if they don't match.

I couldn't get Charlotte to just sit normally. This is the least weird of the poses she was insisting on.

Then Charlotte wanted to get behind the camera so Greg and I let her take some more photos. Should it disappoint me that she's just as good a photographer as I am? Not sure.

I Am Not A Runner

Not sure if anyone noticed, but my New Year's Resolution was to get myself in shape. Boy was that half hearted, huge flop for the beginning of the year. Then my friend, a runner, had her baby and was cleared for exercise at her six week check-up. Most of her running friends were still pregnant. I told her that I would join her since nobody else could and also she was six weeks postpartum. If someone who had a baby six weeks ago can do this then I can.

So we started. Then we were joined by her other running friends when they were cleared for exercise. Now we go so long as the weather co-operates, (nobody wants to run with a severe weather warning on our hands) our husbands are home to watch the kids, and we have enough new nursing mothers who aren't too tired to run. Sad to say, but even with all these other ladies just having had babies, I'm pretty sure I'm still the slowest. I'm super lucky to already be really close friends with them. I know that even if I slow them down, they're happy I'm there.

I'm still not a runner. I'm not very good and I wouldn't say I enjoy the feeling of breathlessness that running induces. My friend, the runner, says that nobody (not even runners) likes building up to being able to run 2 miles continuously so I'm trying and hoping she's right. After that I hope I enjoy the exercise more.

Even with all that I think this process has taught me a lot about myself.

• I may not like exercise, but I do like and even crave being with other women talking and not worrying about my kids.
• I need to have someone else counting on me to show up in order to exercise. If I don't then I wont go.
• Exercising makes me sleepy. REALLY sleepy. The past three days I've taken a nap in the afternoon and still gone to bed sometime in the 8 o'clock hour.
• I kind of like the idea of being a runner. I'm not there yet, and I'm not sure if I'll get there, but it would be cool to have something I "do" if that even makes sense.
• Though I got new running shoes at the beginning of this process, I'm becoming more aware of the running clothing that would be nice to have.
• I'm now worried/nervous about building up my abilities just to move and lose not only people to run with, but time in which I can run.

Banging Around

I love, love, love it that right now Dan has taken Charlotte down to his "shop" in the basement. They decided that Suzie really did need a cat house/climbing tree thing and since it's rainy today they have the perfect opportunity. From upstairs I'm hearing, "OK now hit the nail here.....Stand back while I make this piece shorter." And floating in and through Daddy's words and the sounds of wood moving around and pauses is the constant stream of words from his eager young helper.

Daughters need dads.

Family Photos

Yesterday we went to Purina Farms. I figured we needed to go see it at least once before we moved from St. Louis. Charlotte and Greg had great fun petting the farm animals and watching the dog show. Dan keeps using every interaction with dogs to remind the family that we're getting a dog soon. I'm fairly certain that he's way more excited than the kids about that one. After the show we wandered back to the car and on the way let the kids run in a field. We had a friend use my camera to take some family photos. Then we saw this tree and thought a photo would look pretty great in that tree.I think it looks pretty good, but in order to get into the tree here's what had to happen. Firs we start on the ground:Then he lifts me up and tickles me at the same time! It's amazing I didn't fall on his head.

Easter Frustrations

First off, I'm not crazy. I maintain that it is not crazy to want my children to coordinate in their Easter outfits and also for my son to have a shirt and tie. The holiday is on a Sunday. Every year. You'd think it wouldn't be so hard.

Second off, thanks to grandmas and aunts, I have very rarely had to purchase any clothing for either of my children. We are all so grateful for that. They have much better clothing than we could afford.

Third off, we had heard nothing about Easter outfits from anyone. I figured this year must be the first year I've got to figure this one out on my own. Not so hard I figured. Hahahaha! Not so hard! What a joke. Target had a slew of little girls Easter dresses on sale thanks to my procrastination. I found one that was appropriately cute and had other colors than just pink in it. There had to be some pink because Charlotte was with me and helping me pick one out, but I needed another color to coordinate with Greg's tie.

Then we had a week long torturous running around trying to find a white button up shirt and green tie. Also we needed new church shoes, mostly just for Greg, but I really wanted to find some cheap white ones for Charlotte. That way they would match her white Easter hat.

Why do boys get the short end of the stick with cute church clothing? Or really any Sunday appropriate clothing? Do manufacturers think boys can show up in wrinkly casual clothing to anything and be fine? Ridiculous! I found oodles of things that were adorable for Charlotte she even got new lace trimmed socks. Greg? I compromised by finding a white button up shirt without a tie and then getting a shirt and tie set at JCP. The set was a blue shirt with yellow tie. I figured I could use white shirt yellow tie. It wasn't my original idea, but it would work even though there's no yellow (or blue) in Charlotte's dress at all.

Then we went on to find shoes. We spent approximately 5 minutes in payless shoes before we found the white shoes of Charlotte's dreams. (Mom! they have jewels!) Remember she doesn't really NEED shoes, but they were on sale and cute so we got them. Greg, who has zero church shoes that fit found zero new church shoes that fit. They had exactly one option that he started screaming about as soon as it was on his foot and they weren't even that cute to begin with.

So for Easter, my daughter will have a brand spanking new out fit from head to toe that I absolutely love and my son, through no lack of searching, has whatever works and is shoeless.

Jobs I Hate

Other than the dishes which are my personal enemy there is one job that I hate more than any other.

INSURANCE

I hate figuring out what insurance we need. I hate price checking. I hate filling out forms and I hate hate HATE calling agents. Life would be so much easier if we lived in the same state as my parents and my dad could just do our insurance! It is my annual enemy.

Split In Two

Our yard is outdoing itself right now. We left last weekend for Minnesota with a yard on the verge of spring and came back last Sunday night and spring had come full force. Now this week our tulips are out in all their colors. All the annuals I planted and then were snowed on two days later still made it just fine! They are beautiful and colorful and remind me why I love annuals. And the bleeding heart and wisteria are both showing their colors. When I run in the morning there are some bushes in the park that smell exactly like fruit loops. Exactly. I love the fruit loop bushes. Also, I got to decorate the bedrooms upstairs. They are beautiful. I wasn't going to worry about them until we moved and then realized that I'd signed up to host my interior design group for the month. Turns out they are amazing. I love walking around my house right now. It's clean and put together and just makes me happy! Except for the part where I'm going to be leaving it in under two months. I just feel so torn. Or more to the point I feel like I should be feeling torn. The Minnesota trip was fun, the people were extremely friendly and I'm sure we'll enjoy it there. But right now I want to be here. I want to be in St. Louis with the people I love and my garden and the fruit loop bushes and our bedrooms that look amazing.

What We've Been Up To

Yesterday we went to the park. Charlotte rode on her new bike with training wheels and was a champ! It was pretty awesome to see. I finally told her we'd done enough riding, but the only thing that would get her off her bike was to pick flowers. Shh! Don't tell her grandma's because these are supposed to be their Christmas presents. She says they're for both grandmas because she loves them so much! Greg helped by picking flowers and then throwing them with a satisfying yell each time.
We went up to Minnesota and bought a house, or rather promised to buy a house. They accepted our offer and afterward we went to look where Dan will be employed (can you believe it?!) for the next five years. These two photos (above and below) were around the building. Up is a pretty classic photo of Charlotte.
And this is quite possibly my favorite photo of Greg of all time! It so captures him right now. Really happy when he's running!

So that's what we've been up to.

One To Remember

Today I fell totally, deeply in love. I'm head over heels and beside myself. I admit that it's sort of ridiculous how in love I fell today.

There have been quite a few moments in the past week that I'd really rather forget. Moments that mainly center around personal stupidity, selfishness, or all around crankiness are ones I think we'd all rather forget.

Today though, I want to remember forever. Today was a gift straight from heaven.

I had no plans when I woke up this morning, which is always a problem when you're trying to keep two kids entertained and your house spotless. Having gone to the Magic House yesterday I figured today was a good day for the zoo.

One problem. I didn't really want to go to the zoo. The kids were sheep that refused to be herded out the door this morning. It was almost 11 by the time we got to the zoo. With beautiful weather the free on street parking was practically all gone. I was grumpy and said, "I give up! We're going home." When Charlotte said, "Don't give up now mommy! We're almost there."

So I didn't give up. And it's a good thing I didn't. My two kids and I did the zoo in our own style. We skipped animals we didn't care about, we lingered longer at the ones we did and even spent quite some time just watching the waterfalls. I had so much fun with my kids at the zoo today.

Then after nap-time we went back out of the house to the park.

On the way home is when I fell for my kids again. There was a song on the radio that Charlotte loves. Greg's window was down and he was doing his short legged, car-seated best to hang his feet out the window. We were stopped at a red light, our windows were rolled down and I moved the rear view mirror to see my daughter's face. Her little newly sun-kissed face and bright brown eyes sang right to me, "You and me baby are stuck like glue," while her eyebrows wiggled up and down.

Right then I knew I was ridiculously in love with my kids. I will love them forever and ever and will always think they are absolutely the best children in the whole world. Stuck like glue? We sure are.

The List Just Keeps Getting Longer

Charlotte got sick in the middle of the night last night. Consequently she was stuck on the couch all day today.

All day until we got a phone call saying someone wanted to come see our house in 10 to 15 minutes. We ran around getting everything put away. We woke Greg up from his nap and buckled both kids into the car. With nothing to do we decided to head to Big Lots.

And that's where Charlotte decided to puke again.

This Is Actually Happening

Today the real estate agent came and took photos of our house. Sunday we are having our first open house. Next weekend we are going up to Minnesota to look for our new house. Our impending move from St. Louis to Minnesota and from student's family to resident's family and from well known friends to making new friends is all of a sudden so very, very real to me.

Giveaway

I don't usually do giveaways because I don't usually have anything that I think someone else might possibly want. Today though I think I might have some.

I made fabric party hats for Charlotte's birthday as party favors. I think they were a success and the kids seemed to enjoy them. There were 11 hats leftover after the party. I don't want to move 11 party hats no matter how cute they are. Six of them are "girl" hats with pink ribbons and 5 are "boy" hats with gears on them and blue ribbons. If you want them leave a comment and I'll mail them to you.

If nobody wants them they're going to be given to the goodwill. If more than one person wants them I'll chose at random. I will select the person Friday morning since I have to have the house ready for photos to be put on the market Friday afternoon!

hoodwinked

Today I was ready to buy my son new shoes. For the past couple of days he's been sort of complaining about wearing his sneakers. Then this morning as soon as I put them on his feet he started yelling, "OW! OW!OW!OW!" until he sat down and ripped his shoes and then even the offending socks off his feet. He calmed down immediately, but wanted the shoes back on. I put them on and the same thing happened. I finally convinced him to wear his boots just so we could make it out of the house. Before buying new sneakers I decided to have his feet measured so we went to the stride rite store after dinner and guess what. Both kids have exactly the same size feet they had last fall. Greg is in a 6.5 wide and Charlotte is in a 10. It's a good thing I got it checked because otherwise I'd have been tricked by my kids again.

Sorry for the long absence. We were celebrating. First match day, with its mix of emotions. Then my birthday, with its mix of emotions. Then, we talked to some realtors about selling our house, with its mix of emotions. Then finally, Charlotte's two solid days of birthday bliss, with its mix of emotions.

To celebrate my birthday we had the birthday breakfast and then got to work on the house. We took a short break from work though to take a family trip to the botanical gardens. Charlotte had decided to wear her party clothing to celebrate the day. It was so much fun to walk behind her and watch everyone's face as they passed her. AMAZING. Also, I got the best homemade cards from Charlotte that day, including a portrait of me consisting of a head with arms and legs.

Charlotte was so stoked about her birthday I knew that even with all the stress I couldn't really skip a party for her. We had her birthday breakfast and our family went all out showing their love for her from across the country. She skyped with grandmas and aunts and uncles. She recieved wonderful gifts and cards and she felt so special.

Then came time to prepare for her birthday party on Saturday. She had been talking about nothing else since a week before my birthday. So I decided that I would rather cook a lot of food and have a big family style party than a smaller, kids only party. That way I would get to see my friends close to my birthday too. It started out small in my mind, but ended up HUGE. This was pretty much the last time we were going to be able to invite everyone over to our place. Plus, I figured we could have it outside.

Well, on the day of the party it snowed.

Even though it snowed our friends showed up in droves. We squeezed into the house and I prayed that nothing serious would happen to the place as parents and children moved around en masse. I am so grateful to our friends for making this happiness happen for Charlotte:

What a great week.

Happy Birthday to MEEEEE

It is a little ridiculous how excited I get for my birthday. Every year I keep waiting for me to not get so excited, and every year I still am.

There are two presents and two cards sitting on the top of our secretary for me to open tomorrow. I've been eyeing them for days. What could they possibly be?! And Daniel's present to me isn't even there yet.

I'm also super excited for my daughter's birthday next Friday. We're having a huge informal bbq for her on Saturday and I've been starting to think about how much fun I can make the day for her.

I CAN'T EVEN WAIT.

But I guess I'll have to since I'm married to the King of Waiting.

Boo-yah

Dan's hands were shaking when he opened the letter. I was about to throw up.

Then relief.

Minnesota!

After the ceremony we went home and I practically passed out asleep. I guess the release from the stress was a whole lot.

Add it To the List

Charlotte is a puker. I think she follows in her Aunt Katie's footsteps really well. She once puked totally unexpectedly while sitting on my lap waiting to get the oil changed in the car. It was amazing how quickly those men got me out of there.

Today we went in for her well child check. She has a cold, but I didn't figure it was a big deal. I even told them to give her one shot today so that when we come back after she's well she wont have to get five all together. (FIVE!) There were a lot of coughs and gags during the visit, but nothing big. Then in the lobby on the way out she emptied her stomach on the floor.

And then in the car on the way home.

I want Your Opinion

We found this in our alley. It is sturdy. The wood on the legs is still in tact and isn't scratched up. It's just super ugly and the fabric and padding is totally ripped up. I had Dan bring it home. I know it would take an investment to recover, but I think I could do it. As you can see though it hasn't made it inside the house though. I'm not sure if it would be worth the effort. So here's the question:

Do you think I should keep this to take on as a project?

The Marathon

I once saw this video of a woman running through the finish line of a marathon to win the big race. Only she wasn't running really. More like she was wobbling her way to the finish line. She kept willing her body to move forward even though it was clearly through with the whole thing. She would wobble and almost fall and then get back up. I think one time she did actually fall, but then picked herself up again. She ended up getting second (if memory serves) to another who came from pretty far behind. Even with having zero experience running the image has been burned onto my memory for years. She was just.so.close.

Today Dan got the email that said he matched. We find out on Thursday where. And also we have the last of the doors for the house drying in the basement waiting to be hung. And we're almost ready to paint the final bedroom upstairs. I feel like we are just.so.close.

And yet, my energy is flagging. Tensions are running a little higher between Dan and I than usual. I keep losing my cool with my kids. They are driving me crazy with fighting and with playing and all the talking (and screaming). When Dan isn't home it's like there's a 10 ft invisible rope attached to me and they can't possibly be any farther away. Sweet yes, but I'd really like to take a shower without having to negotiate a peace pact over the bathroom door. They are also being so cute with each other. I wish I could just stay positive more with them. I just want our positive momentum to bring us on home through this finish line. We really have some good momentum going on, but I feel like all of us in this house are hitting the end of our abilities to cope with this situation.

We may not be getting through graduation with flying colors and flags waving, but I'm sure I've watched races with that sort of ending and I can't remember a single one right now. Perhaps this ending (or beginning?) will be more memorable.

Diagnosis: Fatigue

For a while now I've been getting really tired during the afternoon. I figured everyone got tired during the afternoon and tried not to let it bother me. Then Dan started to have more time to spend at home during the afternoons. He would be working around the house and I would crash on the sofa almost everyday. Even if I pushed through the initial drowsiness once Greg woke up from his nap he would want to cuddle. Sitting on the sofa cuddling with a warm body is not the way to avoid napping. It was really hard to not start feeling bad about it. Dan was working so hard and I was spending at least an hour sleeping in the middle of the day. I still tried to wave away the feeling that something was off. Then Dan told me that I really should go see a doctor. That was a shocker. When the doctor, who doesn't really believe in getting sick, tells you to go see a doctor it really means something.

So today I went to the doctor. I told them I felt healthy and normal, but that I was getting tired in the afternoons almost every afternoon. I have to go in to get some blood work done to make sure I'm not anemic or have thyroid problems, but they're pretty sure I don't since I don't have any of the other symptoms associated with that. The whole thing just seemed like a big mystery and the thought bubble over the doctor's head was reading, "everyone gets tired."

Then the doctor asked me if I'd been sick lately. I told him about the massive cold I had a while back that pretty much wiped me out and the puzzle on his face visibly lifted. Apparently what with that bad cold, and selling the house, being the mom of two kids, and not knowing where we're moving my immune system decided to just stop working so well. Sometimes a virus can just suck the energy out of a person for months even a year after the initial cold is over with. He said to go easy on myself, drink water, and don't really expect to feel 100% until after we move. Great timing huh?

The funny part came when I was reading my discharge papers.
Reason for visit: complaint of fatigue

Diagnosis: fatigue

Really?

A Break

Today I decided to take a break. I didn't go for my morning walk with my friend at 6. I slept in and my sweet husband let me sleep in past the kids waking up. And he got breakfast ready for me when I came downstairs.

My next decision was to take a break from working on our house. I know it's madness this close to selling, but so was my state of mind. Also my house is so messy I can't find anything and so dirty that it sort of grosses me out to walk around in it. My plan was to clean and straighten.

Then Charlotte asked me to make a hand print butterfly out of construction paper with her. So I decided to take a break from everything else to trace her hands four times on each color of paper so we could cut them out and glue them together into the most beautiful rainbow butterfly.

Then Charlotte's dog was bored. So he decided to help me pick up their bedroom/toy room. That is one helpful puppy. Greg also helped too.

I decided that I wanted to get dressed so in order to do that I needed to pick up my room and fold a few items of laundry. Charlotte had other plans. I took a break from that to have show and tell time downstairs. My show and tell item was a red hot pad, Greg's was a toy drill, and Charlotte's was a family photo with Santa from last Christmas.

I went upstairs to finish folding laundry. Charlotte decided to be a tickle ghost/zombie by piling 4 or 5 blankets on her and growling at me. I decided to take a break. I played along with her and I grabbed her and tickled her. She squealed, grabbed her blankets and ran across the landing to her room for refuge. Then she came back for more. Unfortunately when you can't see where you're going you tend to walk where you shouldn't. She fell down the stairs. Fortunately she had 4 or 5 blankets on her so she didn't get hurt at all.

While I was showering she put the blankets away (!) and got out towels because we were going to the beach. Greg was acting really sad and screaming. I realized this was probably because it was lunchtime. Time to get back to work. I told her I couldn't got to the beach because I needed to get lunch ready. She was sad. So I decided to take a break and we had a picnic lunch at the beach today. We packed our turkey sandwiches in her picnic basket and climbed the stairs to the beach. She told me the rules at the beach are that there is no "glittering" (littering) and no sharing food. We followed the rules strictly.

The day's only half way over and not much has actually been accomplished. It still has been more fun than anything we've done in a long time.

Please Excuse Me

Dear Friends and Family,

It is a week and a half before we know what our next five years holds. (Match Day: March 17)

I'm hosting preschool this week.

I'm cooking for the missionaries this week.

I'm doing my visiting teaching.

I have to go to the doctor's this week.

I'm trying to get our house ready to sell in about two weeks.

So,

If I end up sounding a little extra crazy I do apologize in advance. Give it a couple of weeks and then I should be back to my normal level of crazy.

Thanks,
Maggie

Shocking

One of the biggest shocks I've had in my life lately came from a casual comment one of my very good friends said to me. We had been talking about how many unexpected struggles we have encountered in motherhood. I can't remember exactly what she said, but it was something to the effect of, when she sees me and how good I am with my kids she sometimes gets discouraged.

This was shocking for a few reasons. First is that I think that she is an amazing mom. One "secret" about motherhood is that although we may love our kids, we don't get to choose their personality. Often times, for me anyway, it is working through the clashes in personality and will within our home that are some of the biggest things my family works on. I think she does this quite well so it was shocking to hear that she may not think so.

The second reason that this shocked me is that we are close enough friends that I feel she's seen me truly lose it with my kids. I mean lose it where I end up having to go back and apologize to my kids. I don't know if other mothers have to do this, but I've lost it before and then felt even more guilt for yelling at my kids. Then I have to go back and apologize and explain to them about my behavior being naughty and doing what I can to fix it. I don't know if everyone agrees with this parenting philosophy, but that's what seems fair to me. I know that she's seen this happen, so it shocks me to think that she has this idea that I'm such a "good mom" it would actually be difficult to be her true self around me.

After thinking about this for a while I think I've learned a few things. First is that, at least for my friend and I, we are harsher on ourselves than we are on others. Why is that I wonder? I'm sure Heavenly Father loves so much despite our imperfections. Why can't we do the same? Second, no matter how close you are to a friend, you never can see behind a closed door or into another's heart. I think I need to ask more questions and wait to listen to the entire answer. Third, being a true friend is to have patience with your imperfections and those of the people around you and being honest and happy about it. I see so much beauty in my friends here in St. Louis that it is heart wrenching to leave them.

Gramps

I was reading this post about grandpas and it made me think of my dad. He has always been such a great example of what a dad should be-someone who takes his responsibility seriously, but also knows that its OK to be the comic relief. I thought about one of the photos that I have on my computer of my dad holding my kid. I loved that photo, but I couldn't remember which kid so I searched around a bit and figured out why.

I guess now I'll need to take one like this for every kid.

Pre-School

We have a carpool for pre-school. I drive Charlotte and her little friend to school and the other mom picks them up. It's pretty awesome.

Also, sometimes we host pre-school at our house and sometimes I'm the helper at someone else's house.

All told Greg has had a pretty good look at what pre-school is for Charlotte and he loves it. Last week I was the helper and Greg came along with me. He sat for storytime, he listened for listening time, he did the exercises during exercise time and the crafts at craft time. I was pretty impressed and I think it was the influence of 6 other 3 and 4 year olds that kept him going in the right direction.

Today I dropped the girls off at pre-school. After they got out of the car and he realized that he wasn't getting out of the car his little heart was broken. He melted into a sad pool of snot and tears in his car seat. I ran in, dropped them off, and then ran back to the car. I asked him, "Did you want to go to pre-school?" To which is sad little response was, "uh-huh." Sorry kid, maybe when you're older.

Because I like It

Charlotte looking down at me from the top of the climbing wall at the playground. She was very proud to have done it all by herself. Also the afternoon of this day it was 70 degrees. It will be spring soon!

The Doctors of Tomorrow

Last week the impending sale of our house suddenly hit me. Well, it wasn't selling the house that hit me, but rather all the work we have left to do before we list the house. That's a lot of work. After my panicking for about a day Dan gave in and let me ask our friends for help. Last Saturday this is what our backyard looked like:I am blown away by the willingness of our friends to set aside all their plans to help us. This was a totally free weekend for all the medical students (a rarity) and I knew that and still I asked them for help. I was sure it would be too much to ask and yet they just kept coming in. And they brought their wives and kids too.
Another friend of mine offered to supply a dinner for everyone so that I wouldn't have to spend my time doing that. She showed up with the delicious brisket with plenty of time to also pick up a paint brush and touch up our spindles. We are so blessed to be living in a community of future doctors that are willing to go out of their way to help us and also offer their kids to help watch ours. It is amazing. Things we got done:

• Paint touch up
• Half dead tree in backyard removed
• Gardens edged
• Mostly dead plants removed
• All doors (but the bathroom) in the house taken down and sanded so that we can paint them
• Window sills scraped and cleaned
• Valence in kitchen re-hung

Are we totally ready? No. It will still be a lot of work the next month or so, but at least it feels do-able now. So a big, super huge thank you to everyone.

Top 5

My husband is usually a very decisive person. He makes a decision and then confidently sticks with it. That is why making our rank list has been maddening. We're both stressed and coming at it from different angles and other little things have been becoming big. That is why last night, when he turned to me and told me we needed to talk about it again, I told him it was the last time we were re-hashing it. After constant flip-flopping our top five locations are as follows:

1. Salt Lake City, Utah
2. Rochester, Minnesota
3. Fresno, California
4. Hershey, Pennsylvania
5. Seattle, Washington

So there they are. It would be nice to get into one of those top five, but he did submit a rank list of 13 places. Now it's just a 25 day waiting game.

Golden Quotes

Charlotte talks so much! She talks so much she forgets to do whatever it is she started doing. Breakfast takes 40 minutes for her to eat a bowl of cereal because she has just kept talking. Getting dressed is oppressively slow as is getting pajamas on. Mostly I just feel like I'm floating through a flood of words and I probably catch only 3/4 of them. I just don't have the energy to listen to all of them. The plus side to all this talking is that she's four so sometimes they are laugh out loud funny. I'll share two of my favorites.

I taught Charlotte Hark the Herald Angels Sing for Christmas. Big mistake because she's just now getting enough of the words to sing by herself. I'm starting to feel really bad about how much my sister and I watched White Christmas the year we recieved that movie. Here is how the song goes when she sings it:
"Hark the Herald Angels Sing,
Glory to the new born King.
Peace on Earth and mercy mild,
God and Satan reconciled.
hmm, hmm, hmm nations rise
hmm, hmmm, hmmm,
With the Jellied Toast proclaim
Christ is Born in Bethlehem
Hark the Herald Angels sing
Glory to the new born King."

Also? She has yet to figure out pitch. So her little serious self is pretty much just yelling this at all times.

The second quote I'd like to share happened yesterday at lunch. I often prepare condensed tomato soup with noodles for my kids. It was a family thing for Dan's family and it turns out is also very kid friendly and cheap. I can count it a 100% success rate for my kids eating it. Anyway, I was rushing yesterday and so the soup was super hot when it came to the table. I told the kids to eat their carrot sticks and fruit smoothie while they waited for it to cool. Charlotte did so and then wanted to check on the soup. After checking she said, "The noodles? Too Hot. The Bra? Perfect." I couldn't hold in my laughter.

As an aside, I feel like we're finally getting the last of the house stuff pulled together. We still have so much to finish, but at least there will be time to get it done now. Also? Dan and I flip flop daily on where we think The Match will send us. Yesterday I was convinced it was Minnesota and Dan thought Pennsylvania.

Inner Gauge

Do you ever sometimes have a very strong reaction to something, but have to stop yourself because you're not sure if you're over-reacting or if your reaction is totally justified? Something totally upsets you, but maybe its just in the moment and a while later you will look back and tell yourself that it wasn't that big a deal. That happens to me a lot. In fact, I count it one of the many marks of growing up that I wait a few beats to react to things. I'm pretty sure that Daniel taught me that. He is amazing at waiting for perspective. Not just a few beats of perspective either. He can wait days or weeks even. Then, if something is still bothering him, he will bring it up. We have avoided countless hurt feelings and angry words by just taking time before talking about things.

I realize that is only one way to responsibly communicate and deal with situations. My sister has said that she is somewhat the opposite. She has learned that if something bothers her she needs to let others know instead of just letting it go. Because just letting it go doesn't really always happen, more often than not it bottles up inside of her. I guess she has the tendency to never tell people, which would then, over time build pressure and explode.

Today something happened with a friend of mine which I'm not going into. I was very angry at the time, but tried my best to just let things cool off. I'm not angry anymore, it really wasn't a big deal, but I'm still bothered by it. Part of me says I should say something. Part of me says that being a good friend is overlooking little situations like these. Part of me says that in a few months we wont even be living in the same state so I should just let it go. How do I know which would be the most responsible behavior?

Picking Cities

Let's play pretend. You get to chose where you will be moving your family in a few months for a semi-permanent amount of time. (That's not our situation really, but do you remember the pretend part?) Here are your choices:

• Fresno, California
• Salt Lake City, Utah
• Seattle, Washington
• Rochester, Minnesota
• Hershey, Pennsylvania

In this pretend scenario your husband will have the same job opportunities, whatever they may be. So that part is not taken into account. What would your choices be and if you feel like sharing why would you chose them?

The problem is that I know very little about all but two of those cities. And of those two I only know them from the viewpoint of a child, not as an adult and mother. The lack of knowledge seems to make the picking much, much harder.

But this is a pretend game so you can chose the cities for whatever reasons you like. So let's hear it.

The Aftermath of Snow Days

I'm not sure if you're aware of this but half the country is pretty much covered with ice right now. We happen to have missed the worst of it by about 30 miles. Does it ever make you wonder about St. Louis always missing the worst of it? Anyway, being on the fringe was bad enough for St. Louis and shut the city down for about two days.

Today though, Charlotte was going to pre-school. It was my turn to drop her and her friend off so I went out a half hour early and started the car. I knew I was in trouble when it took a couple of tries.

After warming for about 15 minutes it took another 15 to scrape the half inch of ice off. I thought to myself, "Good thing I started a half hour ago. We aren't even late!" Then I went to open the back fence. FROZEN shut. The lock was frozen which I chipped free. The latch into the ground was frozen which I kicked free. After that I thought I was home free, but no. The gate runs on two wheels. Two wheels that were two inches deep in layers of ice and snow like the best concrete lasagna you could dream of.

I had been working for about thirty minutes total now and my snot was starting to freeze in my nose when I thought, perhaps if I just kick the fence it will dislodge the wheels. So I turned around and shoved with my foot backwards and something gave way! Too bad it wasn't the wheels.

The slat in the fence is broken. Sorry Sweetie!

PS. Greg loves Ice Age The Meltdown. More specifically he loves the saber toothed squirrel. It cracks him up. Charlotte, however, likes to narrate the jokes. After watching it she says, "He never gets the acorn, but he does get to see the acorn goodness of squirrel heaven."

Product Placement

After all that heavy stuff I thought I'd share some fluff with everyone. So here are some of the things that our household has fallen in love with lately.

Note: These are just things we like. I'm not being paid for any of it. Even though I totally should be.

The first item isn't actually an item. It's The Home Depot which we seem to be frequenting a lot more lately since we started working on our house again. I can not tell you the excitement I'm feeling about being able to move my bedroom furniture out of what is, for now, the playroom. Turns out it isn't the best scenario to have the master bedroom double as the playroom.


Greg has graduated from My Big Truck Book to The Little Engine That Could. He loves it and we read it, a lot. I have pretty much the whole thing memorized, but at least there's actually a storyline.

This is what finally got the purple off the sofa. The only problem now is that the sofa needs to be aired out and we're having freezing rain. Can't really air it out now.

Thanks to Angelina my daughter is constantly practicing arabesques. She learned that word, if not the real meaning, from one of the eight books of Angelina Ballerina that we have been checking out from the library. She loves them.

Well, this one is only recommended by me. Dan thinks it's a waste of money. He's probably right. But after having sickness after sickness rip through our house I'm pretty much willing to believe anything. If someone told me to sacrifice a chicken in the front yard to avoid the next nasty thing headed our way I would have some serious consideration to do. I got a cold a few weeks ago and took them and the cold was so mild I couldn't even really say I was sick. And that, my friends, is what we like to call indisputable medical evidence of efficacy.

So there you have it. What are some of your family's favorite things right now?

Reassuring Inspirations

I went to bed grumpy last night. The house was dirty, the kids were naughty, I was tired and Dan wouldn't be going with us to church in the morning. He had to work.

I left the dinner dishes on the table.

This morning I woke up with a grumpy hangover. At least that's what I'm calling it. Having never had a real hangover, I'm not sure if its a fair comparison.

We got ready for church. Despite the million times I had to tell Charlotte to "come on already" and the blackberry jelly Greg wiped on his freshly ironed shirt we managed to get to church on-time-ish.

I sat there during the opening hymn and thought about how all my good intentions to be a great mom and wonderful wife seem to last about two days before they start to crumble around me.

For example.

I instituted quiet play time for Charlotte in the afternoons. This is a period of time for her to play quietly by herself. She can play with whatever quiet thing she wants, but she has to stay on the sofa. Worked great until the purple crayon incident.

I thought it would be good to start up her reading lessons again. In fact, she asked me to. After scouring the house four separate times I had to throw in the towel and admit defeat. It is gone. With the latest shuffle of items from room to room upstairs it vanished.

TV tickets. She gets two tickets a day. Each is good for a half hour or she can give me both if she wants a movie. She gets to chose when she uses them so long as it's not quiet play time. Works great until 1) TV time is over and she's suddenly so bored 2) she wants to use a ticket 10 minutes before we have to leave. Then we start to fight.

Greg seems to only ever want to be about 12 inches from my body. Really he'd prefer to always be touching me. I should be patient with this, knowing this phase wont last, but I'm not. I'm anxious for him to get out there and explore his world. Go with the other kids and have fun.

And above all is the constant nagging I hear in the back of my head. What do we do when (this activity) is over? That's when the sibling fighting, the mess-making, and the day starts to unravel.

Depressing thoughts for church huh?

So I'm sitting there thinking and feeling, well not depressed, just deflated when a comfort comes and seems to inflate me just a bit. Here were the thoughts I had.

"We get strong by working against resistance."--My mother-in-law

"My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into diverse temptations; knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing." --James 1:2-4

I think that must be my favorite scripture right now. Or perhaps just the one tat the Lord wants me to learn right now. Patience. I suppose that this lack of obvious success must be my resistance right now.

So.

On I go into the week with faith, and (hopefully) patience. Let me learn from last week and then let it go. Knowing that what I'm doing as a wife and a mother is important and is making a difference in my family and then (hopefully) into the community. With this in my mind, my goals for the coming week are:

1. To keep a clean kitchen. I don't know if its the same for you, but the state of my kitchen usually mimics the emotional state I seem to be in. This is completely unintentional. Is that normal? I don't know.
2. Stick to last weeks institutions of TV tickets and quiet time. One week is simply too short a time for a fair trial of the plan.
3. Figure out some activities that my kids and I can do together that I like. If I have to play Candyland one more time I think my mind might implode. Plus, then Greg can't play with us.

I wish you all the very best in the week to come with full confidence that ours will be as well. I hope.

Would Killing Her Be OK?

I knew Dan would be gone all day today so my game plan was to also be gone today. I got the kids up and then headed out to Whittle Shortline Railroad so they could play with the Brio type trains until lunch. I had lunch at a friends.

Naptime did have to be at home. So Greg went down for a nap and Charlotte had quiet play time on the sofa.

Directly after nap we headed out to a different friend's house. Straight from there we went to a third friend's house for dinner.

We came home 30 seconds before Daddy.

That's how he was the one to discover the purple crayon all over the sofa. At first Charlotte didn't want to admit it was her. Then when she did she said, "My mind just couldn't think of anything else to do."

I'm sure using that same reasoning wouldn't be adequate reason to beat her.

It's Over

Today Dan is doing his very last interview. Interview number 11. Let's hope that's enough. It feels good to be done with that segment.

Worth It

After graduation Dan's family is having a family reunion/Disneyworld vacation. Let's just take a moment to be super excited that my husband is going to actually be a doctor soon. One that people can call doctor. One that will actually make money. Yes! So the trip, at least for us, will probably just be celebrating that fact. That's the way to do a family reunion isn't it? His sister, very much like my mom and sister, has started planning. In fact it sounds like she's been thinking about planning for quite some time and now feels its close enough to the vacation date that she's willing to admit it. This feels very comfortable and familiar for me since I grew up with this type of planning happening around me. I prefer to happily agree to plans that are already made rather than make plans myself. Dan is the same way. That's probably why we spend about the first hour of every date driving around getting angry at each other. "I don't care where we go to eat! Just chose a place before I decide to eat YOU."

One thing that she has considerately helped us plan is a possible stroller rental. Dan told me so the other day and then said, "But I don't think we'll even need a stroller." HA! We will be walking all day everyday for a week and our son will only barely be two. We're going to need something. I'm sure he's thinking we're going to be taking our little umbrella stroller with us. And that would be the ah-hem, thrifty thing to do. He is always very responsible that way. But look at what you can get for only $15 for the first day and $8 each additional day:

So worth it.

This Weeks Goals

January has to be the worst month of the year for me. That being said, it is also Dan's birthday. Hooray! His birthday is today actually. So yesterday we celebrated it with a pancake cake and presents and then cake and ice cream in the evening. I'm not sure why his birthday helped me to decide this, but I've decided to make weekly goals. (We'll see how long that lasts.)

Here they are for this week:

• Enjoy my kids more
• Discipline with love instead of annoyance
• Start trying to teach personal prayer to my kids
• Formalize and write out a routine for our days and our weeks

If you can't tell by these goals, we have been having a less than peaceful atmosphere in our home. There have been many tears and frustration. I'm trying to lessen that. If it's just a week then I think we can do it.

Things That Make Me Happy

It is amazing to me that just about the time that I decided to change my attitude my situation changed and made it much easier for me to be happy. Yesterday it was like the fog lifted and everyone in the house was happier. Here are some things that contributed to my happiness:

Fresh vegetables that aren't exactly in season. They are so beautiful and yummy. Usually I don't buy them out of season because they are hugely expensive, but last night it was totally worth it.
The kids actually had enough energy to play by themselves yesterday. That meant a little more work for me trying to referee the two of them, still a little grumpy, and picking up a little more. Even with that though it was pretty awesome because who wouldn't want to come up on a kazoo loving tucked into bed for naptime?Last week with everything happening I decided one day that it was the day to start fixing another bedroom. I took the doors off the hinges and the hinges off the walls and the chair rail down and the molding along the floor up. I started to scrape the walls, but that was tiring so I stopped. Monday Dan must have decided it was time to start too because he picked up the work where I left off and scraped the rest of the walls and then painted the wood trim. I don't know why, but this project seems to be making me super excited. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!
And this last photo Greg is wearing a new shirt that Aunt Katie sent us in a care package. Her husband's family always does a "sick run" when someone in the family is sick. They pick up medications and treats and other things that will help the invalid. Even though she couldn't do a technical sick run she thought we might need it. Turns out we did. Dan took this photo of Greg after he ate his jellied toast for lunch today. Who couldn't be happy when they see that?

A Change of Attitude

Well, nothing changes one's attitude like serving someone else, which I got the opportunity to do last night. I had a friend's son sleep at our house while she went to the hospital to have her baby. With both kids still sick I was worried that none of us would get any sleep.

Truly the Lord blesses you when you serve others. This blessing was immediate in that our sleep over guest slept through the night entirely and my kids only woke up a handful of times and were easy to calm and put back to sleep. We all woke up this morning well rested and the news from my friend is all positive.

Poking my Head in the Sand

Daddy was welcomed home like a rock star. The kids were super excited. Greg learned over his week long absence that he is not actually Mama, but is Dada. He decided to show Dan that by saying it over and over all the way home from the airport. I think the excitement gave them more energy than they would have had because we played outside in the snow and went sledding down our little hill. Charlotte was super excited to tell Daddy about our "Ice cuticles."

Then that afternoon Charlotte's fever came back. Then the next day Greg started his fever. Then last night nobody slept for more than an hour at a time.

Dan has to leave today for another interview tomorrow. I'm sure it'll go great. At least it's a low pressure interview.

With A Cherry On Top

In case this week weren't long enough, we woke up today with Charlotte having a full blown cold. She's puked twice this morning before 9 AM. And I'm almost out of Motrin and Benadryl.

AND, it's snowing. So I had to shovel the walks before the little entrepreneurs came around looking cute and then taking me for all I've got.

Less than 24 hours left.

Making It With Style

I don't do well on my own. Some wives seem to do much better than I. For me at around day 4 or 5 I start feeling like it would be a good idea to start shooting people. Or at least saying really mean things. Because who doesn't like to be around a really grumpy person? Then I call my husband and find out that in fact his trip is going to be a day longer than I originally thought. In my attempt to make him want to never return home again I start to get angry and tell him I have to hang up the phone now. The next morning, after getting some sleep I have to call him and tell him that I'm sorry and I really just want him home.

I'm married to a very understanding husband.

Post Edit:

Also, I would like to direct everyone's attention to one of my friends and the person that has managed to pull me through this week. She posted on her blog about an amazing accomplishment of my little girl. (And with only one complete egg landing directly on the counter this time!) Hope you all enjoy.

Lewis and Clark

Sometimes when we go to the Magic House it really is magical. We went yesterday sometime after naptime. The kids had been up since 5:30 and Greg's nap was unusually short. In short, we were all cranky.

When I turned into the parking lot I hoped it would be a good day. The lot was maybe a quarter full. We would have the place pretty free. Then we started with the Lewis and Clark exhibit on the first floor. When I shot this video I knew we were going to have a good afternoon.

I've never seen Sacagawea and Lewis portrayed so well.

Resolutions

I don't think these are new year's resolutions. It's just that I've been thinking for a while now about things I would like to change and do better at. Then Christmas came and I had a lot of free time suddenly. So I decided there was no reason to put off starting (or re-starting) my goals. So, boring as it may be, here they are:

Make honest to goodness meals at lunch. You know, ones that involve more than one slice of the food pyramid. I think healthy, fulfilling lunches have been my lynch pin in our family's eating habits that I have neglected and has lead to much unhealthy snacking.

Also, I would like to be better about writing down our budget and making sure we stick to it. Fourth year in medical school pretty much trashed all our dilligence in that respect. We need to be keeping better track again.

Actually read the Sunday school and Relief Society lessons before going to my classes on Sunday. That's a pretty low bar to set on my scripture study, I know, but it's totally do-able and you have to start somewhere. Plus, I've really had the feeling lately that I need to "prepare myself." For what, I don't know, for when I don't know, but I'm pretty sure that this is part of it. I've learned to not ignore those feelings, even when I'm not sure how to proceed.

And finally get my body moving...again. I'm nervous about sharing this goal because I know it's so ambiguous. Here's the story, Dan and I are going to have another kid sometime. I want another one, he wants another one. Right now isn't the right time, but that time is coming. When that time comes I want to start out the pregnancy in the best shape of my life. That's not really that big a goal to set because I've never really done any organized sport or been the type to workout. The drawback to this situation is that I don't know what sort of physical activity I like to do. And also I've got two kids, and a husband that's either out of town or in a sub-internship. So what do I do that could actually work long term that I enjoy? What time commitment am I going to have to sacrifice to get this goal going? I'm not sure, but I do want to do something.

So there they are. My Resolutions.

PS. Also, Dan left this morning for another round of interviews including Utah, Seattle, and Fresno. Everyone think positive thought tomorrow for him.

Change Of Plans

I had great plans for productivity today. I was going to get out and go grocery shopping first thing in the morning and clean and organize all day long. I have so many projects on the precipice of being done that I think if I work hard today I will be able to check of so many boxes on the list that I never wrote down in the first place.

I woke up this morning excited and got to snuggle with the kids. Then we went downstairs to breakfast while Dan got to sleep in a little. After I was done eating breakfast I thought I would unload the dishwasher while the kids finished eating. I was all proud of my productive self.

That is until I found the mouse poop! YUCK. So I spent the "first thing" hour and a half seeking out and cleaning any area that had mouse poop. Luckily the mice did not get to the pantry. Now I'm going to be lucky if I can get everything together and in the right direction to get to the grocery store before the time that Greg would fall asleep in the car before a nap.

It seems like my plans never quite work out how I thought.

I Guess It's Time We Moved

Did anyone catch the weird weather in the Midwest on New Year's Eve? I had called my mom that morning and was sort of bragging about how even though it's December our weather was a balmy 62 degrees. As it turns out I think I would take snow, lots of snow, over 62 degrees in the end of December. Do you know what happens when that warm air mixes with the cold moist air?

Tornadoes. Lots of them.

I was at the Schnuck's parking lot when the tornado siren went off. It shares the lot with the fire station, which is where the siren is located. It was so loud I couldn't even understand what it said. And this part is where I know I've lived in St. Louis for too long. After hearing it go off a couple of times I thought, "ehh, I'll probably have enough time to finish my grocery shopping."

I finished the shopping and then came home and brought the groceries in just as the wind was really picking up and drops started to come down. If this had been three years ago I would have already been in the basement for half an hour. But since living here three years I've noticed that they have that siren even if the tornadoes aren't even close.

Even with the callous that had been worn into me I decided to turn on the TV and take a peak at the projected path of the storm. I wasn't really going to head to the basement. With that curiosity in me I saw the meteorologist say that a few tornadoes had touched down just south and west of the city. The vector path was heading directly for our neighborhood!

I realized I wasn't that seasoned I guess because we gathered ourselves together and brought Suzie to the basement while the rain came down and the tornado path moved through. We weren't in the basement for that long though because Charlotte was bumed we didn't break out the granola bars or the weather radio.

No tornado hit us or our neighbors, but you know it's a big one when it has it's own wikipedia page.

Happy New Year!

Our House Exploded

Other than having a huge storm system hit Utah at just about the same time we were supposed to take off to head home yesterday the trip home was nothing to comment on. We were de-iced twice and sat on the ground for around 2 hours. We did managed to still make our connection in Denver, which was also delayed, but only because we carried both children and went our fastest. They were boarding when we were landing. We finally made it to St. Louis at around 1:30AM.

Then we got home and collapsed.

This morning our kids did let us sleep in. Our cat did not.

We did manage to unpack all our 5 pieces of luggage, but we did not manage to find places for all of it. The kids are in toy and book heaven. We are just managing to get around the piles of things until we can get a few orginizational items later this evening.

Hope the winter travel isn't too bad for everyone else.

I'm leaving it up

If you didn't know that last post was my sister's, meant for her blog. I think it's funny so I'm keeping it up there. Hahahaha.

Tomorrow we go home so today I'm sorting through all our stuff trying to fit it all in the bags. I think it will all fit and that my friends, it what you call a Christmas Miracle.

Christmas Recap

How was your holiday?

Mine has been awesome. This year the ear doctor and I loaded up the truck and headed over over the rivers and through the snow to my grandmother's house in Utah. I just love being at her house...it always feels like home the minute I step through the door.

This year there were I few things that happened that I was exceptionally proud of:

1) We frosted gingerbread boys with my two nieces and didn't get any red frosting on my grandma's light colored carpet
2) We went bowling at the BYU campus lanes and even though I saw all 4 of Nie Nie's adorable kids with their dad I didn't act like a total fool and run over to gush over the cuteness of that little red-headed Jane
3) I got the ear doctor the perfect presents for his workshop (little circular saw and leather covered pneumatic stool) and only managed to forget to buy 1 battery...
4) I totally let my little nieces have the first couple of turns playing my new Disney karaoke game on the Wii instead of taking the microphone and belting out songs all by myself
5) I've limited myself to only a single can of diet coke a day


All in all, a pretty successful Christmas!

"Where Did You Get Those?"

Even though Dan left all the presents he bought just before leaving it wasn't a real loss. Firstly, he has the receipts so he can easily return them once we get home. Secondly, our plan (read: Dan's plan) was to wait until we got to Utah to do most of the Christmas shopping. Pretty good plan once he finally convinced me to stop stressing about not having everything done already.

Yesterday, Dan told me that he would just do the shopping and let me be free to take the kids to Tangled and other Christmas activities. I wrote down a list of people that we needed to get presents for and a few suggestions and then let him do his magic. He's an amazing present shopper. He did one marathon shopping trip with the ear doctor, our brother-in-law and was done just before dinner. He took things downstairs to keep in our bedroom while I took one at a time to wrap them. Well, it was a pretty busy night so I didn't get them all wrapped and I forgot about them completely right before bed.

We took both the kids into our bedroom to get them dressed in their Christmas pajamas. Charlotte climbed on the bed and pointed to the few presents that Dan, I mean Santa, had purchased for both the kids pointed and said, "Hey! Where did you get those presents?" We told her we'd talk about it in the morning and rushed her off to bed.

That explains our 9 PM shopping trip to Borders and Walmart last night. We were out trying to restore a little Christmas magic for our kids. Luckily we had about $30 in Borders gift cards to spend so it looks like Santa will visit this little family after all.

And also she forgot to ask about the presents this morning. Few!

This Will Surprise Nobody

For as smart and put together as he is, Dan sometimes forgets pretty basic things. That is why his family will not be surprised at all to hear that he forgot to pack the bag he put his nice clothing in and all the Christmas presents he bought the Saturday before we left for Christmas. He also thought he forgot to pack any shirts whatsoever, but on closer inspection, by me, three shirts were found.

We all have our moments right?

The Excitement is Building

Today we leave for great grandma's house. I can tell that the excitement is building for Christmas. We are finally healthy (enough) and even though we have a long day of packing, cleaning, and traveling we are all very excited.

Everyone cross your fingers that we have a good flying experience.

It Will Never End

Every year when we go to my side of the family someone gets sick. I remember the year I was pregnant with Charlotte and everyone got sick and I thought I might just die from all the puking. This year it wont be us! I can tell you this with complete confidence because we've been sick for the past month. This sickness has climaxed this past week with vomiting and diarrhea. We are getting it out of our system now so that it wont be our turn over the Christmas break. Also I plan on bringing hanitizer (Charlotte's word, not mine) and Clorox wipes with us on the airplane. I may be crazy, but at least I wont be sick.

In spite of all this horribleness, I would like to leave you with something I realized while drifting off to sleep last night. My husband makes me laugh out loud every single day. I think it may be a goal of his. He is truly a very funny person.

The Stats

I know it's boring but Greg's well child check was this week. His stats are as follows:

Height: 33 1/2 inches (Somewhere between 50-75%)
Weight: 25 pounds (Just under 50%)

Did you notice that he actually lost a pound between the last check up and now? Well, he did and nobody's worried about that because he's finally starting to be proportionate.

The Trend Continues

We woke up to 3 inches of snow this morning.

Dan woke up to rain in North Carolina.

For our enitre marriage Dan, the one that loves the snow, has missed most of it.

An Update From Last Night

The Benadryl didn't work. Turns out that it doesn't really help when your daughter has a fever. Then she'll wake up 5 times in a night and ask and ask for more medicine. And its very hard to tell her that you've already given her all the Tylenol and Motrin that she can have. At least she made it through the night without puking, even if we did all start the day at 6 after being up 5 times the night before.

So we got up and put the kids in the tub. The one was perky and happy from a good night's sleep the other one was looking like oatmeal with purple circles around her eyes. I took the little guy out and then went to work washing the hair of the sick one. I turned around when I heard, "uh oh." He had pooped on the step stool and then walked through it. Awesome. After breakfast I sat her down on the sofa and went up to take my shower.

My little buddy went up with me. Mid shower he slipped and I heard a pretty solid thunk on the side of the tub. I opened the curtain and both hands were covered in blood. So there I was naked and wet trying to figure out where the blood was coming from. Turns out he hit his chin.

I didn't want to take him to the ER along with another sick child if I didn't have to so I called up any friends I could think of whose husbands were still home at that time of the morning. Our friend Rich was home. I bundled the sick one and the bleeding one and brought them over to our friend's house and he said it wasn't deep enough to need stitches but that gluing it shut was a good idea. So I held Greg tight while Rich glued it shut.

We're home now and it's 10 AM and I hope we're done with drama for the day.

Introducing:

My Aunt.

She's super funny and just what I needed to read tonight.

Dan's gone again on another interview. This time on three actually. He's driving from St. Louis to Columbus, OH then to Wake Forrest, then up to Hershey Pennsylvania, then back home on Tuesday. I'm hoping that he doesn't hit any bad weather, but just in case I made him pack a loaf of home made bread (with a mixer that doesn't really like making home made bread) and a blanket. If he is stranded in a snow bank at least he can live off of that for, what, an hour?

He left me at home with two sick kids. Charlotte is right now barking out her cough from her bed. I just keep hoping that the Benadryl kicks in and she sleeps through the vomit inducing cough. If not, it'll be a long night for all of us.

But at least my aunt is funny and made me chuckle.

All Is Calm

Today I steam cleaned our cat pee rug and also the upstairs bedroom we are currently fixing. I also did laundry, cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed the upstairs landing, made snacks for the kids, cleaned the kitchen, did more laundry, cleaned the kitchen, read books, played scatterpillar scramble, made lunch, helped start creative recipe playtime, really cleaned the kitchen, more laundry, played three shell monty, lost playing candy land, made dinner, helped the little guy wake up happy by cuddling, finished dinner and cleaned the kitchen again.

Tonight I'm beat. Dan took the kids on his trip to the Home Depot to get more quarter round for the room we're fixing. Perhaps it was selfish of me, but it was super fun to sit here and listen to him try to get the two aimless wanderers out the door. He'd get one squared away and turn around to see shoes on the wrong feet on the other and by the time that was fixed the mittens on #1 were off. The other one may or may not have a complex about being left behind and thus spent most of the time hyperventilating about that possibility. It's funny to hear the same things come out of his mouth that come out of mine when trying to get them out the door.

See? It isn't just me.

Almost 4

Have I yet mentioned that having an almost 4 year old in the house is pretty much delightful? She is so smart and yet still mispronounces enough to make life really funny. My most recent favorite is that she can't remember what her humidifier is called so she decided that pacifier is close enough.

Also Dan's favorite is what she says when referring to mixing up frozen concentrate of orange juice. When she does that she has to "chunk the junk."

Tis The Season

Tonight Dan is on his way home from Nebraska. He interviewed there today. So I sit in this drafty old house, feeling the cold wind rush through the front door (something we'll get around to fixing one of these days) and think about interview season. That is what our lives revolve around right now. We are in interview season and everything else seems to have, well not taken a back seat really, but changed somehow, to accommodate. Christmas seems to be tucked in between Penn State and The University of Washington.

My husband is so smart and capable. I have no doubt in my mind about his ability to accomplish his goals. The Lord has truly blessed him with his skills and also an understanding of the lifestyle commitments that will come along with being a good doctor. It is something that takes a special type of service. I am only coming to realize how perfectly he will fit into his career as our lives unfold. What I am learning about him, he already knows.

That peace and confidence seems to pervade him through this whole process and I so admire it. He finds joy in the successes of his fellow classmates, even when he experiences set backs. That humility and faith, to me, has been the most precious lesson of this season in our lives.

Has this experience been quite so emotional and humbling for anyone else? I feel that questions enter my head that create conflicting desires on an almost daily basis. What if he gets an interview there? What if he doesn't? What if we end up living there? How can I help to support him and prepare our family for what is completely unknown to me? Part of me can't wait to unfurl the sails and speed into the next phase and the other wants to drop anchor and stay in this beautiful moment in our lives.

I have also learned of my own areas that require improvement. I keep desiring for the faith to let the Lord direct our lives. I suppose faith or no He's doing the directing anyway. My faith must then be that if we do our part He will bring to pass what will be for our good. On top of that I must have the humility to stop worrying about anyone else. There are so very many good things that can happen for us no matter where we end up.

What a very wonderful and rich season of our lives.

Something to Laugh About

Here's the best Halloween picture we could get of the two kids this year.

Dancer and Prancer

For your viewing pleasure. I thought you'd all like this.