I have a hard time knowing what and how much to post about my husband on this blog since it's not his and he's a fairly private person. Charlotte doesn't care so I can post pretty much whatever I want, for now anyway, but I always have to sit and think long and hard before mentioning Daniel on this thing. But I decided that he wont care if I share parts of our conversation last night on here.
He came home from school yesterday all fired up about a lunch lecture he'd attended. It was about physicians' rights and responsibilities and how or when the government should be involved. He shared with me all the things that the lawyer presented and how doctors are, as a whole, not very politically involved which is probably not a great thing for them or their patients in the long run. He was also saying all his opinions about it and what some of the other students had been talking about and what he thinks needs to happen with regard to health care in the US.
He was more passionate and excited telling me about this one lecture than he has ever been telling me about any of the classes he's had so far in med school. That is not to say that he's not passionate about learning medicine. I think he doesn't share as much of his school stuff with me because he knows that after about 5 minutes of it my mind starts to wander. Not that I don't find it interesting, I just don't really need to know the depth with which he explains things most of the time.
Noticing his passion coming out (a rare thing indeed) I told him, "It sounds like this is something you're passionate about. If you wanted to pursue this I'd support you in it." He said, "Really? I've thought about it before, but I figured you'd think it was silly." To which I said that he'd really need to work on not calling people that disagreed with him idiots, but other than that he has some pretty great ideas.
The problem with him pursuing this passion probably explains why physicians in general aren't very politically active. You have to sacrifice so much of your time and yourself to become a doctor and you chose something that you really love to do. So then you'd have to sacrifice reaping some of the benefits of all your hard work to go and start something completely new. As Daniel put it, "Do I want to be an orthopedic surgeon or work to defend physicians' autonomy?" Plus, he has no desire to become an MD JD. (I think the initials for lawyer are JD anyway.) To which I replied, "Life is long. You don't have to do everything at once. I bet your dad never thought he'd be acting CEO of anything when he finished his residency, but here he is. Being both a urologist and a CEO."
I don't know if anything will ever come of this passion of his other than just yelling at the TV when the news comes on about health care in our country, but it was kind of fun to see him so excited.
Showing posts with label med school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label med school. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
The Marathon
Lately I've been thinking a lot about the reaction I get when I tell people that I'm having my second child this close to my first, and, oh yeah, my husband's in his second year of medical school. Unless it's one of the many great people I think of as my medical school community, the reaction spans the spectrum from the look of shock, to bewilderment as to how I could actually do this, to, in one really unfortunate interaction, disgust.
I feel like the choices Daniel and I are making are helping us. Yes, our choices make our lives more difficult. They stretch us farther. Daniel's schooling is harder than if he were a single man. It's harder to be a wife to someone that simply can't always be there. I do have to find ways to be self reliant, and self sufficient. Although these stresses are hard to handle, they are our choice. We didn't stumble upon our life path right now. We sat down and planned each step we've taken so far.
Plus, although I've never trained for a marathon (and don't plan to) I've seen people close to me do it. They put calculated stress on their bodies and with that stress their bodies get stronger, leaner, faster, and more able to handle the extreme stress that a marathon puts on them. I feel that the calculated stress that we are putting on ourselves right now is helping to get our family stronger individually, and as a group. Do I think my husband will be a better doctor for it? Certainly I do. Do I think I will be a stronger, more confident, and more capable person for it? Of course. Do I think my children will grow from this experience? Yes. And you know what? I also think that our family will emerge from medical school and residency the better for our experiences during this time.
I feel like the choices Daniel and I are making are helping us. Yes, our choices make our lives more difficult. They stretch us farther. Daniel's schooling is harder than if he were a single man. It's harder to be a wife to someone that simply can't always be there. I do have to find ways to be self reliant, and self sufficient. Although these stresses are hard to handle, they are our choice. We didn't stumble upon our life path right now. We sat down and planned each step we've taken so far.
Plus, although I've never trained for a marathon (and don't plan to) I've seen people close to me do it. They put calculated stress on their bodies and with that stress their bodies get stronger, leaner, faster, and more able to handle the extreme stress that a marathon puts on them. I feel that the calculated stress that we are putting on ourselves right now is helping to get our family stronger individually, and as a group. Do I think my husband will be a better doctor for it? Certainly I do. Do I think I will be a stronger, more confident, and more capable person for it? Of course. Do I think my children will grow from this experience? Yes. And you know what? I also think that our family will emerge from medical school and residency the better for our experiences during this time.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
The Countdown
6 days until we close on our house
9 days until Dan's done with his first year of med school
I'm not sure which he's more excited about. I'm certainly excited for both! Since Dan's doing summer research it's not like he'll really have a great summer break, which makes the being-done-with-the-first-year-of-med-school a little less exciting. Don't get me wrong though, we'll be 1/4 of the way through the first phase. Yippee! Also, I realized the other night that I'll be in the neighborhood of 32 by the time we're done with this whole thing so that put a damper on my enthusiasm.
As for the house Dan has planned out everything as far as he possibly can without acutally getting inside and doing some work. Last night he was ruminating over countertops and wall color for the kitchen. We can't chose those until we know if we're going to be able to salvage the hardwood floors in there or put in tiles. This didn't stop him from trying to chose anyway. Finally I had to look him in the eyes and tell him to stop. He realized that he's gone as far as he can go right now.
I'm not sure if he really can be excited about either prospect right now though because he has so much studying and learning left to do. He has 5 hours of lecture today. He's gonna come home exhausted.
9 days until Dan's done with his first year of med school
I'm not sure which he's more excited about. I'm certainly excited for both! Since Dan's doing summer research it's not like he'll really have a great summer break, which makes the being-done-with-the-first-year-of-med-school a little less exciting. Don't get me wrong though, we'll be 1/4 of the way through the first phase. Yippee! Also, I realized the other night that I'll be in the neighborhood of 32 by the time we're done with this whole thing so that put a damper on my enthusiasm.
As for the house Dan has planned out everything as far as he possibly can without acutally getting inside and doing some work. Last night he was ruminating over countertops and wall color for the kitchen. We can't chose those until we know if we're going to be able to salvage the hardwood floors in there or put in tiles. This didn't stop him from trying to chose anyway. Finally I had to look him in the eyes and tell him to stop. He realized that he's gone as far as he can go right now.
I'm not sure if he really can be excited about either prospect right now though because he has so much studying and learning left to do. He has 5 hours of lecture today. He's gonna come home exhausted.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
The Big and The Little
It has occurd to me that I haven't mentioned very much about the whole medical school experience in a while. This is mostly because medical school is just so big and I don't really know what to say. Most days I think that it's no big deal. Most days it seems like any other job any other husband would have. Leaves in the morning, gets back in the evening. Mostly all I know about the whole experience is that he's either at home or he's not. I know you're all really surprised that my husband isn't much of a talker about this!
Sometimes though it's hard, very hard. My experience with medical school has been a lot like my experience in marriage. (I've only had two and a half years under my belt on the marriage thing and 7 months of med school so I'm no expert on either. That doesn't stop me from having opinions though.) When I first got married and people told me that marriage was work and that you had to work at your marriage to make it successful I always said ok, but I don't think I really understood. Being married to my husband has been one of the most wonderful blessings of my life, but it hasn't been the easiest thing I've ever done. I didn't understand the ways in which marriage could be hard until I encountered them. I never knew the minutae of life with this wonderful man and then our beautiful daughter that could stretch me to what I thought was my capacity and sometimes beyond. I know now better than I did before the hard work that is quietly done by each member of the union that make for successful and happy marriages. And just like with anything else you haven't mastered it until it seems effortless. I also know that future stretching will take place and that it wont be easy. It will be worth it if we are a success at it though.
Medical school is the same. When I told people I was marrying a man that wanted to be a doctor I always heard the sentiment that it was hard for people that had done it before. I agreed, it would be hard. I didn't understand the challenges that would face us. Some of them are not unique to medical school. Some of them all couples face. And some of them are unique to medical school. They're never huge obstacles that I feel I need to hurdle. Mostly it is the minutae and logistics of our life now that stretch me a little bit more each time I encounter them.
What I also didn't understand about either experience going into it was the wonderful blessings that have come out of both. When I have been stretched beyond what I thought was my capacity I discovered new facets to my spirit I never knew existed. I also discovered new things about my partner in this journey. The trick is to make sure that we're going forward together. That is my ultimate goal.
Sometimes though it's hard, very hard. My experience with medical school has been a lot like my experience in marriage. (I've only had two and a half years under my belt on the marriage thing and 7 months of med school so I'm no expert on either. That doesn't stop me from having opinions though.) When I first got married and people told me that marriage was work and that you had to work at your marriage to make it successful I always said ok, but I don't think I really understood. Being married to my husband has been one of the most wonderful blessings of my life, but it hasn't been the easiest thing I've ever done. I didn't understand the ways in which marriage could be hard until I encountered them. I never knew the minutae of life with this wonderful man and then our beautiful daughter that could stretch me to what I thought was my capacity and sometimes beyond. I know now better than I did before the hard work that is quietly done by each member of the union that make for successful and happy marriages. And just like with anything else you haven't mastered it until it seems effortless. I also know that future stretching will take place and that it wont be easy. It will be worth it if we are a success at it though.
Medical school is the same. When I told people I was marrying a man that wanted to be a doctor I always heard the sentiment that it was hard for people that had done it before. I agreed, it would be hard. I didn't understand the challenges that would face us. Some of them are not unique to medical school. Some of them all couples face. And some of them are unique to medical school. They're never huge obstacles that I feel I need to hurdle. Mostly it is the minutae and logistics of our life now that stretch me a little bit more each time I encounter them.
What I also didn't understand about either experience going into it was the wonderful blessings that have come out of both. When I have been stretched beyond what I thought was my capacity I discovered new facets to my spirit I never knew existed. I also discovered new things about my partner in this journey. The trick is to make sure that we're going forward together. That is my ultimate goal.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Odds and Ends
Since I have so many Charlotte things on my mind the non-Charlotte tidbitts seem to be piling up so I thought I'd unload them now:
- You are so tricky Daddy! I didn't know you knew how to make a google account. Now you should start a blog so we know what you're up to and we can comment on yours.
- Isn't my husband the best?! He goes to work every morning before I wake up (well, it wouldn't be before I wake up if he didn't have to go in "early" every day. If you go in early every day can you still say you're going in early?) and comes home exhausted. On top of this he still has energy to cuddle, and play with our baby. Plus, he changes her diaper without being asked and he gets up to burp her in the night too! He really is an amazing daddy.
- Another "my husband's the greatest" fact is that he still makes it a point to tell me he loves me and do silly things to make me laugh. (Like putting on one of my maternity shirts to go play football in. He didn't really do it, but it was a funny sight nonetheless.)
- When my mother-in-law came for the baby she went shopping while we were in the hospital. It has been such a fun treasure hunt to see all the little things she got for us and the baby. I made a box of brownies yesterday and read Charlotte the three books she got us.
- The green chair that my dad got us has quickly become the favorite of all that are in our house. It is so comfortable and nice. Charlotte even likes to take naps on it.
- I'm so excited for my cousin's wedding/Charlotte's blessing weekend becuause everyone will see how awesome and beautiful our little one has become. (OK this one isn't non-Charlotte, but it crept into my list anyway.)
- My niece and nephews have added some new words to our vocabulary. The first one is a cubby. My sister-in-law calls wedgies snuggies instead. When her daughter heard this she mixed it up and thought she said cubby so now they're always called cubbies. My nephews are reading The Chronicles of Narnia series, but the younger one calls them The Cronciles of Narnia.
- When we go walking in the morning I notice all the gardens in town and you can really tell the gardners. One that I like particularly well runs right along the side of the creek that runs through town. The gardner has planted such an interesting flower along the stream and I'm so curious about the name of it. My mom has always said that I like Dr. Seuss plants and I'm sure she would put this one in that category too.
- I realized a few weeks ago that I really have become used to our little town. My husband and I were driving to my grandma's house in Salt Lake. I caught myself waving to the man mowing his lawn and the two little kids riding their bikes. The man waved back, but the kids looked confused. I realized then that we weren't in our little town anymore and had a good laugh at myself.
- Right now we're deciding between moving to Philidelphia and St. Louis. It'll probably be St. Louis. My husband has already started looking at places to rent in the area.
Well, this post probably wasn't very exciting, but I wanted to wrap up the odds and ends.
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Patience is a Virtue
Well, I forgot the CD I had with all the photos I took on it at home when I went into work today so you wont get to see the glorious bounty that baby Charlotte already has. You'll just have to be patient.
Speaking of photos I decided to use my $50 from grandma/pa to get a memory stick. We borrowed one from my mom last year during the school year and ever since we gave it back to her I've missed being able to carry around all that information in such a compact and convienent format. When I told my husband my plan he was very supportive of it. I think this is because he plans on using it for med school in the coming years. This is fine with me since I've never even been close to needing all the space on one of those things at once. I was actually thinking that maybe I should buy him one for his birthday. (January 24th for anyone that wants to give him something or call him or think good thoughts for him.) I decided against it though since the main reason I wanted to get it was to use it as an easy and convienent way to transport photos from home to work so I can email them to family and friends. It seemed a little selfish to get him a present because I wanted to use it too. I have decided to get him something else entirely that I'm sure he'll enjoy and I really have no use for. Anyway, can you guess the first thing that went on the little device after I got it? Well, it wasn't any photos. It was my Sweetie's letter of intent that he's working on. Plus, he took it with him to California so I can't use it at all while he's gone! Lest anyone think I'm complaining, I'm not. I just think the whole situation is so funny! I never thought he'd like it so much! I'm sure I'll get plenty of opportunity to use it for my own reasons. I just need to be patient.
For the astute readers out there, yes my husband is in California. He left yesterday and had his interview at Loma Linda today and will be back tonight. I had awful sleep last night. He wasn't there and I've gotten used to him propping up my leg while I sleep and having a pillow at my back so that my ribs stop hurting. He wasn't there last night and boy did I feel it! Also I have this anxiety about his interviews. I thought that would pass once he was accepted into one school, but it hasn't. I still feel very anxious each time I know he's in an interview. I think it's just that I want the people he's interviewing with to see how incredible he is. He still has two interviews left (Ohio State, and NYMC). I'm not sure of the dates for either one though. I hope it's before mid February because I really don't want him in another state that close to my due date. Applying to medical school is the longest process! (I'm sure applying to dental school and law school are too.) I just wish it were over. I still day dream about him getting into UW and how great it would be to be so close to family. Not that a five hour drive is all that close, but it's way closer than Phillidelphia. Patience. Patience. Patience.
This next part isn't about being patient, but it does tie in becuase it's about my Sweetie. You know it's time to get yourself bigger undershirts when your husband sees you wearing it and comments on how you look similar to Winnie the Pooh. (How Pooh's shirt is always short over his tummy.) I did ask him if he knew that Pooh is described as being "tubby" and "stuffed with fluff." He said that Winnie the Pooh is also described as being a bear and I'm not a bear (also that Pooh can eat a whole meal just out of honey and I can't do that either.) Mostly I just thought it was funny, but I did get new undershirts.
Another thing that I have to be patient about is Charlotte's weekly present from Aunt Katie. My sister is the best sister/aunt ever and my baby hasn't even arrived yet! I know I've mentioned how I get weekly gifts from her before, but I've never gone into the excitement and anticipation I have each week as I visit the post office. I will make special trips each day just to check the mailbox. The only other things I get in the mail are bills and bulk mailings. It's been so great to know that each week I get something in the mail just for me (well for Charlotte, but for me too!) This has been the happiest mailbox I've ever had, even though I have to go a block to get to it! I feel so blessed to have a sister that is so excited to be an aunt! She's the only one (except for Daniel of course) that has been excited to feel the baby move. Sadly that didn't happen as much when I wanted it to. I wait, with varrying ammounts of patience, each week for our little manilla envelope of joy!
The thing I really need to be patient for right now is the arrival of baby Charlotte. After that childbirth class all I can think about is her arrival. Will my mom be here at the time? Will Charlotte come so that my sister's spring break lines up with it? When will we bless her? What will she look like? Will she have red hair? Will she have hair at all? I talked to my mom about her labors (my sister and me) and both were pretty short, if that's any indication of what I have to look forward to. Another change since the class we went to is Dan's attentiveness. He is such a sweet and loving husband! He keeps saying how he thinks I'm so brave and strong to do this and he would help me if he could. I think it's sweet, especially since I don't really feel all that brave or strong while complaining all the time. It's not like I really have any choice about this baby coming out at this point anyway. The only part of the birth that I think he will get distracted by is that I'm pretty sure that if/when I get the epidural he'll want to see that process and how it all works. Not that he's totally unfamilliar with the process though. I'm just so excited that I can't wait! Let's just cross our fingers she doesn't decide to arrive March 19th!
Speaking of photos I decided to use my $50 from grandma/pa to get a memory stick. We borrowed one from my mom last year during the school year and ever since we gave it back to her I've missed being able to carry around all that information in such a compact and convienent format. When I told my husband my plan he was very supportive of it. I think this is because he plans on using it for med school in the coming years. This is fine with me since I've never even been close to needing all the space on one of those things at once. I was actually thinking that maybe I should buy him one for his birthday. (January 24th for anyone that wants to give him something or call him or think good thoughts for him.) I decided against it though since the main reason I wanted to get it was to use it as an easy and convienent way to transport photos from home to work so I can email them to family and friends. It seemed a little selfish to get him a present because I wanted to use it too. I have decided to get him something else entirely that I'm sure he'll enjoy and I really have no use for. Anyway, can you guess the first thing that went on the little device after I got it? Well, it wasn't any photos. It was my Sweetie's letter of intent that he's working on. Plus, he took it with him to California so I can't use it at all while he's gone! Lest anyone think I'm complaining, I'm not. I just think the whole situation is so funny! I never thought he'd like it so much! I'm sure I'll get plenty of opportunity to use it for my own reasons. I just need to be patient.
For the astute readers out there, yes my husband is in California. He left yesterday and had his interview at Loma Linda today and will be back tonight. I had awful sleep last night. He wasn't there and I've gotten used to him propping up my leg while I sleep and having a pillow at my back so that my ribs stop hurting. He wasn't there last night and boy did I feel it! Also I have this anxiety about his interviews. I thought that would pass once he was accepted into one school, but it hasn't. I still feel very anxious each time I know he's in an interview. I think it's just that I want the people he's interviewing with to see how incredible he is. He still has two interviews left (Ohio State, and NYMC). I'm not sure of the dates for either one though. I hope it's before mid February because I really don't want him in another state that close to my due date. Applying to medical school is the longest process! (I'm sure applying to dental school and law school are too.) I just wish it were over. I still day dream about him getting into UW and how great it would be to be so close to family. Not that a five hour drive is all that close, but it's way closer than Phillidelphia. Patience. Patience. Patience.
This next part isn't about being patient, but it does tie in becuase it's about my Sweetie. You know it's time to get yourself bigger undershirts when your husband sees you wearing it and comments on how you look similar to Winnie the Pooh. (How Pooh's shirt is always short over his tummy.) I did ask him if he knew that Pooh is described as being "tubby" and "stuffed with fluff." He said that Winnie the Pooh is also described as being a bear and I'm not a bear (also that Pooh can eat a whole meal just out of honey and I can't do that either.) Mostly I just thought it was funny, but I did get new undershirts.
Another thing that I have to be patient about is Charlotte's weekly present from Aunt Katie. My sister is the best sister/aunt ever and my baby hasn't even arrived yet! I know I've mentioned how I get weekly gifts from her before, but I've never gone into the excitement and anticipation I have each week as I visit the post office. I will make special trips each day just to check the mailbox. The only other things I get in the mail are bills and bulk mailings. It's been so great to know that each week I get something in the mail just for me (well for Charlotte, but for me too!) This has been the happiest mailbox I've ever had, even though I have to go a block to get to it! I feel so blessed to have a sister that is so excited to be an aunt! She's the only one (except for Daniel of course) that has been excited to feel the baby move. Sadly that didn't happen as much when I wanted it to. I wait, with varrying ammounts of patience, each week for our little manilla envelope of joy!
The thing I really need to be patient for right now is the arrival of baby Charlotte. After that childbirth class all I can think about is her arrival. Will my mom be here at the time? Will Charlotte come so that my sister's spring break lines up with it? When will we bless her? What will she look like? Will she have red hair? Will she have hair at all? I talked to my mom about her labors (my sister and me) and both were pretty short, if that's any indication of what I have to look forward to. Another change since the class we went to is Dan's attentiveness. He is such a sweet and loving husband! He keeps saying how he thinks I'm so brave and strong to do this and he would help me if he could. I think it's sweet, especially since I don't really feel all that brave or strong while complaining all the time. It's not like I really have any choice about this baby coming out at this point anyway. The only part of the birth that I think he will get distracted by is that I'm pretty sure that if/when I get the epidural he'll want to see that process and how it all works. Not that he's totally unfamilliar with the process though. I'm just so excited that I can't wait! Let's just cross our fingers she doesn't decide to arrive March 19th!
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