Saturday, July 07, 2007

Mom Friends

Everyone (and by everyone I mean all the mom/parenting type of magazines) says that it's really important for me to get "mom friends." The good news about this is that my sister-in-law lives three blocks away from me and had her baby 7 weeks ahead of me. We are a perfect match so that whole, this-is-how-I-met-my-first-mommy-friend thing was already made the moment we moved into town. The bad news: we're moving in three weeks. We're moving to a place that I have never seen before and never really paid attention to until I found out its a place I might live.

My husband is totally stoked to be going because, well, this is his life's dream. Goal number one since the third grade (when he figured out he would not be big enough to ever be a pro football player) was to become a doctor. I am so excited for him and for us that we're on our way to the future! I feel like his cheerleader sometimes. "Way to go honey! I always knew you could do it! You are the best!" These remarks are all deserved on his part. He's a great husband, and one of the brightest men I have ever met.

Here's the thing, St. Louis doesn't have my mommy friend! I am so comfortable with my sister-in-law that I know I can go over to her house in the middle of the day and she wont feel inconvienced. In fact she worries when I don't show up for a few days! Medical school is a full time sort of thing. I know my husband, as great as he is, is only human. His time will be taken up much by his schooling (as I think it should. I don't want my doctor to have slacked off learning his profession when I go to get help!). Plus, he's not a mom, he's never been through what I'm going through. It feels so therapeutic to be able to talk to someone who knows exactly what I'm going through because she's going through it too.

I feel exactly like I did when we moved the summer between fourth and fifth grade. To be precise I feel like I did on the second day of school. I had no idea what I was jumping into then. Now I know how hard it can be to make new friends. Here's hoping it's easier at 23 than it is at 10. Maybe it'll be like freshman year in college. Everyone was friendless and looking for new friends and so it was pretty easy to make them. Yeah, it'll be like that. Right?

6 comments:

Heather said...

I'm sure you will find friends fast because you are Maggie, and everyone likes you. Plus no one will ever forget your name because of your red hair right? Anyway, I bet it will be similar to freshman year. Just try to make friends with the new moms in your ward.

Anonymous said...

I know it's uncomfortable - but you'll make friends fast.

I'll suggest a variation of what I did as a single woman in new city... I first went to singles/ dating events - speeddating etc... horned my way into monthly wine parties... and introduced myself to women at the gym. Soon I had two healthy social circles as a hub.

seems it would be easier for you as a new mom. Go to the library... sign up for some classes.
Join a mommy and me group... take her to the play ground. I know she's small now.. but just taking her for a stroll in the park will expose you to other women in your situation. You'll be fine!

I like you and I don't even know you!

The Barkers said...

I'm sure it will be like that, and if it's not, this mommy-friend is only 6 hours away!

Anonymous said...

I feel your pain! Being a dr's wife has its own special package of perks and pitfalls (and the perks can take a while to come). When my hubby and I got married and moved following his medical school, I changed jobs, specialties, states, & left my huge family, stomping grounds, pets--everything, and I was a new wife, to boot. Yes,it can be hard. But it is a chance to rediscover so much. One great resource is to be found the other med school wives. You will all be in a similar boat, so tap into those girls! I don't know you personally, but from your blog you seem like you have moxie and are pretty independent. Be your fabulous self, reach out (because they're all scared and shy, too), and you will start a great new adventure!--Katharina in CO

Anonymous said...

There are lots of young couples with babies out in St. Louis going to medical school. The wards close to the medical schools are full of them. You'll find friends in no time. My brother is in medical school at Washington University in St. Louis and they just had their first baby. Their ward is great.

Jim Layton said...

St Louis has LOTS of LDS med students (and some law students) - many of them congregated into particular wards. You'll find them!

Oh - and though it will be really hot and humid when you arrive, fall will be wonderfully long!