Mom Guilt

This Saturday I'm going to fly to Denver to visit with my sister and her new little boy for a week.  I'm only taking Lee.

I can not tell you how excited I am for this trip.  It'll be an actual vacation, sort of.  Since Dan is currently on the Trauma Service we asked his mom to come and watch the kids.  She graciously and generously agreed to come and help keep the older two kid's schedules on track.  Everything is set and I'm getting excited.

I figured out one thing that certainly wasn't set over the weekend.  I had neglected to inform my older children about this trip.  When I mentioned it to them Greg was unconcerned.  Charlotte also seemed unconcerned.

Until bedtime last night.

Walking by her room I heard little sniffles so I invited her to come and cuddle me on my bed.  She told me she was crying because she was worried about me leaving her!  And cue the crushing guilt.  I realized this is the first time I will be away from her for any extended period in her whole 5 years of life and this worried her.  And here I was excited about that prospect.  I hadn't even tried to prepare her for this because I had failed to see how this would be a big deal for her.  I told her that we could skype everyday and that Grandma was coming and she was really excited to get to spend extra special grandma time with her and Greg.  I'm not sure what extra special grandma time exactly means, but as it turns out, that was the thing that finally calmed her down.

I love her so much and I know this experience will be good for her, but I also hope it will be fun for her too.  (And also for Grandma too.)