Now that things are starting to settle into a livable level of organization in our home (will it ever be really organized-right now I don't think so) I'm realizing that I've got to get myself back into my happy routine. I vaguely remember a nice routine I had last year through the haze of construction dust. I just can't really seem to feel caught up. I feel like a contender on American Gladiators going through the eliminator. They make it so far and then they have to go up the, well, I can't remember the name of it right now, but it's the incline with the treadmill thingy on it. They've worked so hard to get there and they want to get going, but they just can't keep their feet under them. Yeah, that's kinda how it feels.
I really want to get Charlotte to walk to the library with me one day a week. It's only three blocks away. Then we'd get in some nice physical activity and we could check out some new books each week. I'd also like to start going to the botanical gardens again. I love being there and just letting Charlotte go wherever she wants to. It's great. I'd love to take her to Music Makers every Friday morning. She loves music and I think she can get a lot out of it. Also I want to keep her going to the Medical School Wives playgroup. I think it's good for her to interact with all the different aged kids there.
And then there are the things I want to do for me. I want to have my sewing space set up so that I could finally make the curtains I have fabric for. I also would love to start exercising again. I haven't been since we started this house deal and I realize now that I miss it. I tried to go running with Charlotte, but she's now too heavy to use a regular stroller. I've felt very good about using what I had, but I just can't do it anymore which basically means I'm not going to exercise again until I find a new solution to that problem. Also I would like to have time to either take a class (like my wood working one that was awesome) or read some more books. I also want to have time to go visit with my friends and just talk.
When you look at each of those things they aren't that much to do. It's when you add all of them into your schedule that things start bumping into one another. Especially when you realize that on top of all the things I want to do there are the things I have to do. I still have to unpack things and organize things and we still have to eat so I still have to go to the grocery store. The millions of little errands that will never end. Gah!
So how do I pick the best things? My tendency, and I know this about myself, would be just to cross off that whole paragraph about the things I want to do for me. That can't possibly be the right choice though. Each thing I cross off my list though brings a little bit of sadness, and if it's something I'd like to do for Charlotte a little bit of guilt. If I don't do it am I really being the best mother I can be? I don't mind making decisions between good and bad. I don't even mind really making decisions between good and better. It's hard when the choices are between good and good. Who's to say what the "right" choice is then?
Don't get me wrong, I know I am truly blessed to be able to have this dilemma. Many women, and I guess people in general, don't have all the many options I have. They don't get to choose their wants at all for various reasons. I am so grateful to have these decisions in front of me, but now which choice do I make?
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4 comments:
Hi, I think you are very busy but need to decide what you are going to do so that you don't feel so much pressure. I love you house hope to see it some day. You have done a great jog decorating.
Love,
Grandma Jane
It's called "THE TRAVELATOR"
Good luck on finding balance. Take a breath every now and then and celebrate the moments you have right now. You're a great mom and you're doing an awesome job with Char.
Have you checked Craigslist for a baby jogger? The great thing about being a mom is you learn how to multi-task at a whole different level. So when you find your baby jogger, you can get Charlotte in it, jog to the library, check out some books for Charlotte, and then instead of jogging right back home, extend the trip a little bit. Charlotte will have new books to look at as well as the passing scenery.
You and Dan have done a great job with the house. Hope some day we'll be able to make it to St. Loius to see it.
Heather- My secret desire is for the phil and teds sport stroller. I love it. It is awesome. With all that awesomeness comes a heafty price tag though. It's high enough I know I'm never going to have a phil and teds sport. I'm trying not to covet it, but it's just so amazing.
I've looked on craigslist too. I just haven't really gotten serious enough about giving up on the phil and teds yet I guess. Plus, if I'm going to spend my money on something, I really need to be sure it will be something I like and jogging strollers go FAST on craigslist.
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