Note: All of the following is my own view and not necessarily my husband's. He may or may not agree with me on this topic, but I thought I'd write it down just to think it out. Also, for that reason it's probably not very well organized since this is the first time I'm attempting to get the circling ideas straightened out in my mind.
On a slight break from the all kids all the time mode, I thought I'd post about a husband related topic that I've been thinking about lately. I've heard from several sources recently about how some people feel that being a doctor is "a calling" that one must sacrifice for, be dedicated to and be "passionate" about. Obviously not all three of these things typically come out of the same source every time, but you get the idea.
I disagree.
I think being a doctor is a profession. It's a job that you chose for yourself because you are drawn to it. There is something in it for you, whether it be the thrill of solving problems, the satisfaction of helping people, or the myriad other reasons people chose to become doctors. Each person's reasons for becoming a doctor are as varied as the doctors themselves.
I will concede that becoming and being a doctor requires a lot of sacrifice in time, energy, and capacities of those individuals and families pursuing it. As I look into the face of having a newborn baby and a husband that is starting his third year in med school (typically the hardest year I hear) I'm trepidacious. I also think you have to be dedicated in order to complete such a lengthy, and challenging education process. Let's face it 4 years of undergrad, 4 years of med school, 4-5 years of residency and that's not including 1-2 years that could be thrown in extra if you want to go into some sub-specialties. I would not dream, however, to compare myself and my situation to those of military families, for example. In that family one or both spouses/parents are physically out of the picture. Not only that there's also the chance that they could never come back. Now that's sacrifice.
Even with all that, I still don't think being a doctor is a calling nor would I qualify it as my husband's passion. I would say that my husband's passion is, well, me and our family. Our well being. Also, he's passionate about our religion, our country, and our freedoms. I think he has that in common with most people around the world. In my mind those are the things that lie near and dear to most people's hearts. If medicine were his passion I don't think he would relate very well to any of his patients. That's not to say he doesn't love the practice of medicine. It's not to down play the eagerness with which he is pursuing his goal. He loves what he is doing. He will make a great doctor. I'm just saying that there are more important things in his life than his job.
Which is exactly what being a doctor is, a job. I would be equally proud of my husband and his support of our family if he were a mailman, a carpenter, a marine or a farmer. He works hard, for himself, and for us and I think that's something to be admired.
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3 comments:
Sometimes when the decision to become a doctor is made very early in life, it is hard to know if it is a calling or a choice. Dan's dad wanted to become a doctor since he was 4. He was given the gift of healing and discernment for healing in his patriarichal blessing. I think he sees it as a calling - even though he is currently an administrator. I know he misses the patient contact and the OR every day. Also, Dan grew up in a small town where his dad was never really "off call" since we would encounter patients everywhere and they felt comfortable asking questions of him at any time. The wrestling coaches called to have him check rashes before matches! To live that life, it has to be more than a job - it is a commitment to serve a higher good whenever your skills are needed. Some medical specialties and some training programs today seem geared more to medicine as a profession that you leave at the end of the day. I guess it is really how each doctor views his commitment to the work of healing that determines whether it is a profession or a calling in his life. Dan decided pretty early that he wanted to be a doctor and part of the decision was seeing the relationship his dad had with his patients in a variety of settings. It also might be how "calling" is defined since some callings change from time to time while others remain for life. Which ever it is, it takes determination, intelligence and commitment to get through the training to even begin the work.
I just want you to know how much I appreciate you in my life. I love my friends that do not agree on everything and stand up for what they believe in. That being said I thought I would share my take on the matter.
We would not be here if God did not want us here. God lined our path for the way in which we were brought here. “Our” decision for Eric to go to Medical School was not decided over night. It was something that I was completely unsecure about and my awesome, loving husband would have chosen another path if I would have asked him to because his passion lies at home with me. We wanted a very clear answer from the Lord so we kept it to ourselves and in prayer for months until we were given the answer of Gods direction in our life’s. If this was not of God… believe me, we would not be here and there would be NO reason for Eric to become a doctor. He could easily have switch schools, become a nurse, or chosen to go back to school for something that would have taken 2 years. This is of God and I hope he is using us in the ways that he laid out for our lives. God uses people all the time in ways that are clear and/or unclear at times. Something’s take years to really realize the significance or impact that you might have had on someone or something but what matters is the essence.
Mags-
I think that we'd agree that every major life choice should be made with input from God. It is from him that we recieve special talents and abilities that make it possible to suceed in different arenas, right?
So if someone's gift is being a healer then it makes logical sense that they should be in medicine.
If someone's gift is being able to figure things out and understand physics...maybe they should be an engineer.
If someone is great at interacting with people they should probably have a career that interacts with people, like sales.
If someone is freakishly good with money maybe they should be dominating the world and running huge accounting firms all over the world.
If someone's gift is being nurturing and loving. Being patient, kind and hardworking they should probably be a mother.
In my mind, anyone who is maximizing their God given gifts is living their personal calling.
Maybe it is in this context that the previous commenters consider their callings?
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