Here's the question that I had that I never got the guts up to ask. I always assumed that the actual baby coming out of you was the most painful part of labor/delivery, but I think that might be wrong now. They talked about the final phase of stage one labor (transition) being the most difficult over and over in the class. Does most difficult mean most physically painful or does it mean mental or emotional difficulty?
Things which I am unsure about:
- pain medication-I'm a wuss and I never considered not getting an epidural. On the other hand I'm a wuss and I saw what they have to do to give you one and I don't know if I want that either. Let's face it, I have a hard time getting blood drawn. Plus, I also like the idea of being free to move around more if I wanted to.
- leaving with enough time to get to the hospital-they talked about not having to go right away since you're typically in early labor for a long time. We do have a 30 minute drive to get to the hospital though and that's with normal weather conditions. I'd like to get to the hospital with enough time that I'm not nervous about time. There's enough else that I will have to concentrate on besides making it to the hospital. At least we aren't the couple in our class that lives north of Preston, ID. They need to schedule for a 50 minute drive.
Things which I am totally sure about:
- Number of people in the birthing room with me-The hospital allows up to four people (besides my coach) in the labor/delivery room with me. That's five extra people! I don't really think I need an audience. The people I would like/feel comfortable in the room with me are 1) Dan, 2) my mom, 3) my mother-in-law. Those are the ones that if it's possible for them to make it I want them there. People that I would be OK with also being in there are my sister (although I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to see the actual thing happening, but if she does and she's there I'd be ok with that).
- I don't want the mirror-watching the head pop out of me isn't necessary.
- Feel the head coming out-in some of the videos the doctor told the mom she could reach down and feel the head coming out and the mom did. I so don't need that. Let's just focus on getting the baby out.
- My husband's interest in all things medical-although he did lean in and tell me during one video that OBGYN is totally out of the question for his specialty.
Mostly I'm more nervous about breast feeding than I am about labor/delivery. That may sound silly, but the fact of the matter is that in labor/delivery I will be surrounded by medical professionals that know what they're doing. They've done it many, many times before and although I am aware that every birth is unique and different, I'm in the hands of specialists. Breast feeding is all on me and I don't know what I'm doing. I don't want cracked, chapped nipples or mastitis.
7 comments:
Here's my 2cents: ask your mom about her labor & delivery history-that will give you some idea of what you might expect about time & pain levels. Only you can decide about pain-meds & most can wait well into labor to be given, so you could decide to wait & see how you are tolerating labor. I agree with you that a "cast of thousands" isn't a good idea in the labor room - I never felt like "entertaining" while in labor - barely civil is about what I could muster. I seem to remember that the hospital there recommends a lactation specialist to new moms; she seemed to know alot of helpful things but you have a great resource in Jenny, too. Nature takes over at somepoint in the birth process & your body will do what it is programmed to do, so I'm sure things will go fine. Dan seems to be shaping up to be a more attentive coach than someone else who shall remeain nameless was - just don't let the medical folks get him too distracted with the medical side of it knowing he is headed to med school (hpappy dance- happy dance!!)
I am expecting my fifth around the same time you are due, so I enjoy your thoughts on your first labor and delivery. You sound much more prepared than I was with my first. Here's a few tips. 1.Don't worry about getting the epidural. You will truly feel much better after you do. 2.The third stage of labor is the hardest because of the pain and the strength you need to get the baby out. But, it should go fairly quickly. 3.When you start breastfeeding, use lanolin right away to save your skin from getting cracked. Also, your hospital should have a lactation specialist available to help you. Make sure you have her come in as soon as possible to show you how to latch the baby on correctly. A properly latched on baby and lots of lanolin will make breastfeeding a lot easier. (At least that is what I am praying for this fifth time.)
Thank you so much for the invitation to be in the room with you. That meant a whole lot to me, but you're right about me. I'd rather just be waiting outside in eager anticipation!
For breastfeeding, I recommend Dr & Mrs Sears' book. It is fantastic & helped me so much. I read most of it when I was about 37 weeks pregnant, so when I had the baby the info was relatively fresh in my mind. Then I just reviewed key parts after delivery as necessary. Getting the baby correctly latched on the first few times is key. I think if you do that, the baby learns quickly & things go well. I never had cracked or bleeding nipples or anything. They were just sore. I second Anon - use lanolin from the very beginning. Also rub a little breast milk on your nipples after a nurse - it's antiseptic!
You will do a great job! Trust your body. You will know during labor if you want drugs. Some women don't feel much pain, some feel lots. I delayed going to the hospital as long as possible, since it's boring there. I waited until the pains were pretty near unbearable (I was 7-8 cm dilated by the time I reached the hospital.) But I only live 10 mins from the hospital. With a half-hour drive, I would say leave a bit earlier than "unbearable pain" stage. "Quasi-unbearable"? Ha ha
Here's a link to the bfing book:
http://www.amazon.com/Breastfeeding-Book-Everything-Nursing-Through/dp/0316779245/sr=8-1/qid=1168369651/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-5116968-7581428?ie=UTF8&s=books
Thanks for all the helpful advice! It's always good to hear what others have to say!
I hope you don't mind a comment from a stranger. I just wrote a post about epidurals, though, that you might want to read.
My first four births, I didn't want to see the baby coming out, didn't want to feel the head, etc... The last three, I really did want to experience that.
Transition is usually the hardest (as far as pain goes) part of labor and delivery. If you aren't anesthetized, pushing (for most women) actually feels kind of good, comparatively speaking. Labor is about relaxing while your uterus does its thing. Pushing is about getting to do what your body wants to do anyway. No more fighting it, if you know what I mean. A lot of times women scream or yell or growl during pushing. It sounds scarier than it is. The noises aren't usually made because of pain, but out of working hard. Like the grunting noises you might make while you push a couch. Not because it hurts, but just because it's heavy and you're working hard.
I recommend to all first time moms to attend a La Leche League meeting, if you can, BEFORE your baby is born. That way, if you do run into any problems, you have highly trained people who WANT you to call them at all hours of the night so they can help you. Breastfeeding *can* be tough because teh baby's new at it, and so are you. PLUS you have hormonal fluctuations like crazy, you're sleep deprived and you're recovering from childbirth. It's a handful. Having a GREAT support system is essential.
Good luck!
Thanks so much! I too, also thought that the most painful part of labor was the time where the baby pop's his/her little head and body out. Maybe because that's the only part you can actually SEE visually when watching a live birth. And thank you too for the comment about how it's not a bunch of screams/grunts for sharp pain during the last stage of labor. The analogy to a really hard workout is absolutely perfect. I'm so terrified of labor pain because I've never experienced it before. It's nice to have some good descriptions of what to expect (I know it will certainly calm me down when the time comes for my first delivery!)
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