So the common idea about red heads is that they also have a red hot temper. Do I believe this? I don't know. Is it right about me? Again, the jury is still out. I'd like to think that it isn't the case. I'd like to think that I'm a fairly mellow person. Then something comes along to disturb my calm. It is then that I am confronted with what I will do.
I've learned that even though I may feel unable to control my anger, I can completely control my actions and words. Past experience has displayed in detail the shattering consequences my angry words can create. It is much harder to pick up the pieces of a negative situation gone much worse thanks to me, than it is to just let the dust settle and look at the picture as a whole.
My mom always told me to ask myself, "What do I want the result to be from this action or these words?" I know I'm angry when the answer to that is to just zing the other person. In the end that doesn't get me anywhere near where I'd like to be in any situation.
That's the little lecture I give to myself whenever I feel myself wanting to respond to anyone in anger. I may end up saying the exact same thing to them later I may decide to say something completely different or even nothing at all. But, when I do it with a level head I get much better results 100% of the time.
Which makes me curious, do most people consider themselves level headed? Do most people I know consider me level headed? (Please don't answer that one. It would be embarrassing either way you answered.) Does my pep talk make me have less of a temper or merely help me to control the temper that I do have? What are some other things people tell themselves to keep from saying things they'll regret?
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
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3 comments:
I definitely saw a difference in how quickly you showed your emotions between our Freshman year and later. I don't think I ever saw you do or say anything without it seeming totally justifiable though (like the idiot who said something about marines going to work to die or something like that). I really look up to you because I have a hard time expressing any emotions. I can totally get walked all over and have my feelings crushed and never mention anything about it to the person. I wish I was able to stand up for myself when the circumstances called for it.
I think you have found a good balance of knowing when to speak and when to hold your tongue. Good job, Margs. I think you're the best!
Thanks Heath. I've never really thought of it as a balance type of thing before. I've only ever really thought of it as when not to say something. You're totally right. Everyone needs to arrive at a balance.
Sounds like you have more control than I.
I am blunt. to a fault. Even when it's not something hurtful - just sharing ideas at work or such... I settle on a good idea so fast that I offend the person who offered the other thought. Doesn't even occur to me when it's happening... I just don't see the point mulling things over when the answer is obvious.
and I know this is really immature but my word verification is cmywee. hee hee.
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