Spree

Remember when I told you all about the buying spree we went on when we moved here. Well, apparently it wasn't over. Since then we have purchased one Honda Odyssey which is the same color as our Matrix, which we will be selling just as soon as possible.

Then yesterday we bought a sofa and love seat set. They are beautiful and we managed to get an incredible deal because they are a discontinued style and were a floor model.

Also we went to Cabela's and found a new coat for Charlotte (It's a purple Columbia coat, not camo or real tree) and new mittens for both kids for this winter.

Also we went to Target and got Thomas and Mater undies for Greg along with all the other potty training supplies we'll be needing. Maybe next week. I want the anticipation to grow for him just a little bit. But he is super excited about his new undies.

All of that spending in one day was way too much for Dan. He couldn't manage to buy any other groceries while we were at Super Target because we'd already bought a sofa. Never mind that we actually needed some of the groceries.

I didn't care though because we got to spend the day with Daddy yesterday and it was awesome. He is super funny and we all had a great time together.

Quick story: We were driving down the road the hour to get to Cabela's and out of nowhere Dan looks down at his pants and says, "Hmm, these should have gone into the laundry." I laughed so hard. "Isn't that something you should screen before you put the pants on?" I asked. Then Charlotte pipes up from the backseat, "I scream for mice."

New Challenges

Two is such an interesting and intense age. Every feeling that my little guy has is felt entirely through his body, even if it only flashes for two seconds those are an intense two seconds. It is also such an age of contradictions. Although he clearly adores his sister, his favorite thing to do all morning this morning was run up to her and take something of hers away or push her or knock over what she's working on and then run away laughing as she screams in frustration. Clearly he wants to play with her, but his efforts were not meeting with success.

Also, my emotions in dealing with my two year old are very intense and swing wildly. One minute I will quietly watch him working with his cars and his newly rediscovered favorite dump truck and be totally amazed by him. I love him so much. He has become such a talker and I am amazed by what he tells me (mostly).

What I simply do not love is his insistence on destroying things. He is currently grounded from markers and also any book of any kind. When markers come into that child's hands they go anywhere. Today I found huge splotches on my sofa cushions that had been turned over. Part of me knew that his sister was trying to cover for him and I thought that was nice of her. Part of me wanted to scream because this is not even close to the first time he has colored on that sofa. As I was taking of the fabric that could be removed to be washed I turned around to a tearing sound. Greg had taken a really nice hard back library book and was slowly running his little finger up one page so as to tear it out. This is also not the first book he has done this to. What I wanted to do was grab the book and smack him with it. What I did do was send him to time out. He has no idea what a bullet he dodged today.

Note to self: When he turns 15 you should try letting him have markers and books again.

Suburbs

Did you know what the best thing about living in a neighborhood like this is?

Right now my daughter is happily playing downstairs with the little girl across the street. This little girl is very polite and amazing and their playing together without so much as a word from me is perhaps the best miracle ever.

I love four!

Now let's just hope I can get Greg to that phase. Boy is that kid 2!

Just What Grandma Wants to See

Thanks Aunt Katie for teaching Charlotte to pose like a model for photos. Here are the best shots I could get of Charlotte's first day of school.

Greg had to wear his Sheriff's hat because he desperately wanted to go to preschool and you have to wear special clothing to preschool. He was terribly broken hearted when he found out that he was not going to preschool. All the way home he kept saying, "My turn preschool!"

We of course need the crazy sibling photo from the front porch.

Charlotte was dressed and ready a half hour before we had to leave. Then she informed me that her tummy hurt. That's what happens when you're that excited.

Her teachers told me that she was excellent in class and really smart. So that was gratifying to hear. Charlotte told me that she played with Paige and sat with the girls at the girl table. So I take it from these pieces of news that the day was a success.

OK Never Mind

When they said side effects could include dizziness what they really meant was that you will need to lay down to keep from feeling like the house is falling.

Also? Constipation worse than I have ever had....ever.

Plus, I've still thrown up the last two days.

Medical Miracle

Guess what is a medical miracle.

Zofran.

I was able to wake up this morning actually feeling rested.

It is amazing.

Greg's Talking

I don't think I've mentioned lately how much I love just listening to my son talk. He's at that amazing phase where he can say pretty much anything he wants to, but sometimes it comes out wrong. He thinks about it and then corrects himself. Also his syntax is so funny. Their funny mistakes when learning to talk makes up for just about everything else that comes with a two year old.

A few nights ago Greg wanted some of whatever sauce Dad put on his rice. Dad tried to tell him he wouldn't want it to which he said, "But yeah Dad!"

This morning after eating his off brand otter pop I told him to throw the wrapper away. I didn't understand when he said, "sych-a-bin?" until he walked over to the sink and opened the door to the recycling bin. My two year old knows about recycling! I had no idea.

True Love

My husband is amazing. He overwhelms me with his sure knowledge of what it means to be an honorable man, husband and father. He seems to have an unending amount of energy, love and stamina and I feel wrapped in his love everyday.

Not only does he have a very stressful and demanding job, but he manages to get home and pick up the slack that I seem to be leaving around all over the place. Last week he worked the 6am to 8pm shift. That meant he wouldn't be able to see the kids awake at all for the whole week. You know what he did? He got up extra early and went in before his shift started, worked as hard and as fast as he could, even right through his dinner just so that he could be home to help put the kids to bed. I can tell you it made all the difference in our week.

This week he's working 7pm until 9am. When he got home this morning I was really hoping to just have things together so he could go right to bed. What happened was he walked in the door and was met by his son screaming at the kitchen table, his daughter angrily shutting herself in the bedroom and his wife crying on the chair in his son's room. Within 5 minutes he had everyone soothed, pulled together and ready to face the day.

We may not have the time or money to really get to "romantic" activities and things in our life right now. I keep learning that it doesn't matter what is defined as romantic, what really matters is that I love him. He loves me. And we know it. Every day.

Soccer Camp

If I were prepared I would have brought a camera like the other moms. As it is I was proud of getting there on time. Charlotte's in a little, very informal, (someone else's) mommy run soccer camp at the moment. It's fun to see her get tired, but still want to not let the other team make a goal. She's working at it and that's fun to watch. Greg, being 2, is too young to technically participate in the camp, but still manages to make his way into the training exercises his sister is doing. I did manage to make him stay off the field the last little bit of the day when they had a game.

Charlotte's team name for today:

The Sparkle Go Girls!

What Do You See

We told the kids about baby #3. It felt too soon, but Charlotte was getting worried about how sick I am. Now whenever I tell her that I feel sick she says, "No Mommy, you're just pregnant." Very cute.

This time around things feel so different from the others. The sickness seems to be more acute, but what has bowled me over is the emotional toll of the pregnancy. Let me attempt to explain. Maybe it's because I'm hormonal and thus can't really control my emotions. Maybe not.

Not only am I sick, I'm exhausted. And I can't seem to plan anything. All this means is that I feel like I'm missing all my definitions of what it means to be a good mom. I know that my kids are resilient, and so I try not to worry too much, but I feel so guilty. Pretty much all the time. I see discipline problems, I see boredom, and I also see amazing creativity. All of which I want to be proactive about, but can't seem to rouse myself enough.

With all of these experiences though I seem to be learning a few simple and precious truths. The first of which is how much I love my kids. They are so amazing. I love my kids with a fierceness that motivates me to fight to get up in the morning and be with them. My love for them seems to be greater than I would have ever known if I hadn't had to work against this resistance.

Also I know that what I'm doing right now, bringing this baby into our family is exactly what Heavenly Father wants for our family. I know that Dan and I want a baby, but if it weren't for how hard this one has been I don't think I would have had to have such faith in this choice. I know with the very core of who I am that this baby will forever be a blessing to everyone in our family. I, obviously, don't know how things are going to turn out, but I do know that our choice has been a good one.

With this choice I know that I will get help from Heavenly Father. I know that as I strive to work toward this goal, whether I meet it or not, my efforts will be added on. I know that Dan will be blessed in his work and at home in his capacities as well.

We are doing what we need to do right now and that feels really good.

Even if everything else doesn't.

The Big News

So I'm pregnant.

Six weeks, which is probably too soon to tell people. I always do that too soon. And I also never tell in some sort of fun and special way. I love to hear how other people do this, but I guess I don't put a high enough priority on that.

Speaking of priorities this pregnancy has really focused my priorities because that's all I can do right now. Necessities.

I took the kids to a little beach, was it only last week?, and brought a picnic. Forgetting that my daughter takes one bite of food and then has to pee 100% of the time, I just started in on the food. Mostly because I was shaking and going to throw up. She took her first bite and then said, "I have to pee." I looked up the hill to the public restrooms, down at the blanket full of beach stuff and food, at my son eating his lunch, and then back at Charlotte. Then I told her to run to the water, find a place by herself, sit down in the water, and pee there. Because not peeing in the lake (where fish are peeing anyway) is not a necessity.

Also, my kids look absolutely ridiculous everywhere we go lately. Fighting over what to wear? Not necessity. Fighting over doing your hair? Not necessity. At least they're not naked.

So sorry to all if I let things slip. I'm focused on making it through the day, loving the two kids I have, and helping a third come into our family. Turns out that is taking everything I have.

Puppies and Babies

We're training Percie.

It takes a lot of work.

It feels like having a newborn all over again. Only this time my newborn isn't small and cuddly and really, really good smelling.

This time my newborn pounces, and nips, and smells really really bad.

So maybe it's like having an 18 month old boy who is naughty.

The difference is that with an 18 month old boy, I've already had the whole newborn, and baby phase to build up all my love.

But she is so very good and smart. Hopefully things will start to stick soon.

Goals for the week: Attention when called, standing on a loose leash, sitting, keep working on not jumping on the counters (we are going through way too many Clorox wipes)

PS. My cat is sick and keeps sneezing. I'm totally mean because this makes me laugh.

Four turning 94

My daughter has said a few funny things lately and I don't want to forget them.

At dinner two nights ago I was really tired and not really looking forward to bed time. I told Dan so. Then Charlotte's little voice perked up and said, "It's like I always say, Life is hard sometimes."

Today at the park Charlotte and Greg were playing really well together. In fact they were playing so well we stayed there for three hours. I was keeping an eye on them and watching Greg follow Charlotte around each of the areas. Then I noticed that Greg was not with Charlotte so I asked her if she knew where he was. She said, "Oh! I dropped him off at the little kid play area." Just like she's 16 or something.

A Great Saturday

We made new zoo friends with the otters.

We got a lifetime first riding in a model A at the Olmstead County History Center.

Anyone got $1000 just lying around?

A few nights ago Dan asked everyone at dinner if they could buy something right now what would it be. Charlotte, of course, said the cowgirl toy set. His answer? A new TV. That was it. Just one item. Immediately a list popped into my head and during the next few days that list got longer and more organized. Then I realized I needed to stop thinking about this. I've got lots of things already and my life is so very blessed.

Then today my sister wrote a post about being bummed about turning 30. Wouldn't it be nice if I could surprise her for her birthday? Yeah, $1000 just isn't in the budget for something like this.

I Like My Kids

My kids are a bit overwhelming right now. Greg says "No" automatically to everything. He is two after all. Charlotte seems to be experimenting with being mad at her parents. I keep thinking that we should be settled and established right now, but, of course, that's crazy. I don't feel like I'm settled. I'm sure my kids don't feel settled right now either. All this has made for a few days where my kids say, "I'm bored" and I say, "So am I!" Having all of us bored makes for more negative interactions all around. Then Dan comes home exhausted and we all turn to him wanting him to entertain us, which isn't fair.

With all of this going on I feel like I've had a lot of complaining about my kids in my heart, on my mind, and slipping out my mouth.

Tonight at dinner I asked everyone what their favorite part of the day was. Dan said coming home. I said painting with Charlotte and Charlotte said cuddling with me while we watched a movie.

Here's what I realized today. Not only do I love my kids, I like them. I think they're fun. I want them to know that I want to spend time with them. I never want them to think that I don't want them around. There will be a time when they no longer want to spend time with me, I don't want that to come sooner because they think I don't want to spend time with them.

I will try to remember that vocalizing things make them much more frustrating to me. And also that little ears hear more than I think and they understand sooner than I think.

Entrepreneurial Art

When Grandpa Greg was here Charlotte fell in love with a cowgirl hat, riding stick pony, and cowgirl toy set. She's been saving her money in her princess bank for a while now. She has also been doing all she can, when she thinks of it, to earn some money around the house. Daddy even helped her count her money once to see how much she has. She almost has enough for the cowgirl toy set, but earning money has been slow going since she's not been around Grandpas.

Last week I gave Charlotte some cardboard, paints and her paint brush. For days we heard about how she was having to work so hard to get her paintings ready for "the show." (How did she come up with this idea?) If we wanted to buy them ahead of time they cost "sixty seventy dollars" but if we waited to buy them at her show they would be $1. So we decided to wait for the deal. She amassed a hefty pile of cardboard masterpieces ("portraits and landscapes" are her specialty) and they were waiting patiently on the counter for the show.

Trying to come back to a normal wake-sleep schedule after working nights for a week was a bit rough for Dan. Saturday at dinner it hit hard and he just seemed so tired and past being able to deal with family life. I said, "Daddy looks sad. We should do something special to cheer him up." Charlotte's eyes lit up and sparkled as she came and whispered in my ear, "We should make him a card." Not wanting to actually help Charlotte with card making I said, "You should give Daddy one of your masterpieces." She got even more excited by that idea and ran to get one.

After sifting through them to find just the right one for him she walked over to him, tapped him on the shoulder to get him to lift his head off the table and said to him, "Here this is for you." We waited a moment to admire the painting and how selfless and cute this little four year old was. After Daddy said how much he liked it she said, "And if you want to keep it it only costs $1."

The good laugh that we got out of that surely was worth $1 and Daddy said he's going to hang it up in his locker at work. Who could argue with that sort of salesmanship!

I think she might just have enough now for the cowgirl toy set.

Serious Stuff To Laugh About

Oh boy, night shifts are hard on the family! Or maybe it has just been a hard week, I'm not sure. Here are some of the thoughts I have had this week that hopefully I can laugh about now.

First, and not surprisingly Charlotte got sick after the fourth of July (which was amazing and lovely). Tuesday night I got about four hours of totally interrupted sleep. I was actually pretty scared by the severity of the puking this time, but all is well now. At around 4 AM I was holding Charlotte in our green chair so she could sleep upright. I was thinking about how I could never be a breaking and entering type of burglar because you never know what's on the other side of the door. Like in our house that night, some unsuspecting thief could walk in and then have Charlotte puke all over him. No, I did not think about how those people would probably be worried more about guns or knives. It was the possibility of being puked on.

Secondly, there have also been a lot of runny noses in our house. I'm thinking allergies, but since I've never taken them to be tested for that type of thing I don't know. Yesterday I was busy washing anything that may have touched the sick one. I walked by the sofa, where the sick one was told to not move from, and saw that one of the sofa pillows looked funny. I picked it up and there was green boogers all over the thing. Not wanting to jump to conclusions I asked who had done this. Then the sweet little chocolate eyes looked up to me and said, "I did it mama. My nose needed to be wiped." As if that's a totally normal thing to do when you're nose is running. I thought perhaps when I ask that I need to have a more menacing tone. Perhaps that would strike fear into her.

Lastly, Greg broke my kitchenaid mixer this morning. Honest first reaction: let the beating commence. Unfortunately I don't actually believe in beating my kids, which I guess is a good thing since I would have missed out on dress up time today. He decided to wear a cape, mardi gras beads, a tie, a diaper, princess heels and carry a purse.

Jumping Into The Deep End

Today is Dan's first day of actually working. His first rotation is General Surgery for three months. This week he is working nights (6pm-6am) in trauma. His very first weekend as a resident and he's working trauma during the 4th of July!

I'm confident in his abilities as a doctor, but he doesn't really have any experience with the computer systems, this new hospital and all the staff in it. Yikes! I hope he does well.

Trying To Find Audio

I want to play this piece of sheet music I bought. It's Beautiful Savior/ Lead Kindly Light arranged by Kay H Ward. I got it because it looked like a challenge. It is. I think I need to hear it in order to make sense of it, but I can't seem to find a recording of it anywhere. Any advice?

The both Picked Their Own Outfit

Shortly after this photo was taken Greg tripped on his boots and skinned his knee. He then refused to wear the boots.

Charlotte wore this outfit to go running. I kept trying to convince her that a dress wasn't really running clothing, but she insisted that she was wearing the right shoes so she'd be fine. And she was.

On Having Second Thoughts

The wonderful honeymoon phase in Rochester is over. Dan has been home, but studying all week, which means he really hasn't been able to be around much. Then today he really was gone. And also it's been cold and rainy. It's the end of June and we're wearing long pants and jackets. Also it's been overcast and rainy for a while. Somehow the rainy weather has sort of rained on my emotional parade.

Today I took the kids to the indoor play area at the local mall and found half of Rochester there as well. As I was sitting there waiting for a friend to show up I started to think about our plans for the coming year.

Specifically about Charlotte and preschool. We decided that we can't afford preschool. On the one had this is probably going to be the tightest year financially we've had so far. She's also pretty smart and socially capable. On the other hand winter is long here. We don't have too many friends and not huge prospects at making too many more. (Or is that just the newness talking?) And also? Having nothing planned for the fall scares me since I've been doing the co-op preschool with Charlotte for two years.

I sat there watching my kids running around being free to be kids and do whatever they wanted there. They were so happy to be out and about. And it almost made me cry. What am I doing here without a Magic House or Science Center or Zoo? What did we get ourselves into? When I ask people what sort of things there are to do here I get this list of outdoor activities and then a list of three indoor activities. Maybe that's why it seems like all the kids Charlotte's age are in preschool. That's what there is for them to do here.

There are no guarantees in parenting and right now I wish there were. I wish I knew someone that seems to fit my style of parenting that chose to keep their kid home from preschool and was super happy about that decision. I wish I were certain that I could come up with the mental, emotional, and physical reserves needed to help my kids to be their best. I wish I knew what the next year holds for me, my sanity, my kids and their sanity.

Cutest 50 meter Race Ever

He was so serious about running until he realized that he was alone. The Rochester track club set up this event for kids. It was awesome.

I loved her hair bouncing behind her.

They both got participation ribbons.

Writing a Better List

This morning I decided to make a list so that the chores I had to do today would get done and I would feel a sense of accomplishment. It is now 2 pm and I've been working up a sweat most of the day and all I've got done from my list are changing linens, a few loads of laundry, breakfast, lunch, and some dishes. Gah! I should have added:

• getting kids dressed
• playing with kids
• reading scripture stories
• ready every book out of the storytime book bin from the library
• setting up all three play tents and tunnels in the basement
• making lunch a picnic on a blanket in the living room
• playing memory
• rescuing Greg from Percie
• helping paint rocks with Charlotte

When I add those to the list I realize why I feel like I've been working so hard.

Something new

If I could only find the cord to attach the camera to the computer I would show you some awesome photos. Also if I could find one of the three battery chargers we own I could take more photos of the kids. I'm sure you are all waiting for them. Be patient. The dust will settle. At least that's what I'm going to assume. Let's just hope that when it settles I will have found where I put the dust cloth. Also, did you know that I am currently in possession of three, count them three, vacuum cleaners, none of which have full function! I would love a new vacuum.

In the mean time we have managed to have a few new exciting buys for the new house. The first being a new lawn mower. Not really exciting, but Dan said that the Honda works great. I insisted on a self propelled mower since our yard isn't flat and once work starts it's any body's guess as to when he will have time to do it.

Also, we purchased a new kitchen table. Our original little guy was just perfect for our family, but with the years, and let's be honest the kids, all the finish was rubbing off the top. We were going to just refinish it. Then earlier this week we were window shopping a new furniture store in Rochester. They had a $700 table in the scratch and dent section for only $98. That is cheaper than just refinishing our old table. When we got home Dan looked online and found the exact same table on Amazon for $250 which made us feel pretty smug. He did end up purchasing four matching chairs online so they should come soon. This sort of behavior is so very out of character for Dan!

Once we got our new table Dan has been oddly protective of it. In order to not have his head explode every time Greg comes to the table we went to JoAnn's today and bought clear vinyl to put over the top. This way the top (which was in no way scratched or dented when we purchased the table) will remain nice.

Also we purchased some outdoor pots for plants. They were %70 off at JoAnn's and it was Dan's idea. I was again shocked that he bought them. They will make a nice arrangement on our front step and for herbs maybe on the back deck?

Ok, so maybe it feels like a spending spree, but once I wrote it down it doesn't seem like that much. Either way it's been a nice change of pace for the two of us.

Eating Right

After almost three solid weeks of eating out and eating treats and having pop around all.the.time we made our way to Rochester. We are coming down off the junk food high pretty well, but, well, let's just say that our digestive systems are still adjusting to the whole wheat, fruits and leafy green veggies.

I will forever chose sweet over salty. I mean salty is good sometimes, but for the most part I chose a sweet treat. I have found that once I've started into the pattern of having lots of sweets around I always want them around. That seems to be the only hiccup in the whole situation. I want sweets just about every night after the kids go to bed. Does that happen to anyone else? I hope so.

At any rate the sugar detox started last week and I have been surprised at how well it seems to be going. Of course the kids are asking for pop and sweets, but since we don't have it around the house it's easy to say no. And also we've kicked off the summer veggie eating.

Here are a few options that we've tried lately that have been surprisingly well received by my children:

-Muhamara dip with pita bread and carrot sticks for lunch. (Dan thought this didn't really constitute a lunch, but I noticed he didn't need any snacks between that meal and dinner.)

-BLT bread salad which is a baby spinach salad with crumbled bacon, tomatoes, feta, green onions and homemade croutons. It was simply delicious and the kids even ate the spinach!

-"Mock Gyros" which is really just pita sandwiches. Mindy gave me the recipe, or rather left it at my house so now it's mine!

-Indian-spiced salmon with basmati rice. I totally over-cooked the salmon, but everyone still ate at least some of it.

-An orecchiette salad with baby spinach tomatoes and roasted bell peppers. This one was not so enthusiastically received by the family, but I loved it. Dan gave his usual answer to vegetarian dishes, "This is good. You could add some salami to it."

-Cilantro lime black beans which is also a recipe that Mindy "gave" to me. These made excellent enchiladas.

With this success in getting my kids to eat things that look different than normal and have a higher percentage of veggies I've been very happy.

And Also?

Reflections from today:

When the dog is in the house the cat hides inside the sofa. As soon as the dog is out of the house the cat sits by the back sliding glass door to taunt her.

Hilarious.

Having a puppy and a two year old means I actually have two toddlers.

Frustrating.

Today we went to the nature center here, which is not surprisingly much smaller than the St Louis nature center, but with much better hiking available outside the actual center. It was our very First Rochester Family Activity. It is the middle of June and we were all wearing sweatshirts from the slight chill and the drizzle. Just like Pacific Northwest summers. We saw a wild blue jay up close and personal.

Thrilling.

Charlotte told me that the nature center wasn't our First Rochester Family Activity. Our First Rochester Family Activity was when the two of us spent 45 minutes coloring her Tinkerbell coloring book together after Greg was in bed last night. She told me that it was her special Disney world coloring book so she wasn't going to share it, but that I could have pages if I wanted to. She and I decided to have a repeat on that activity during nap time today.

Touching.

YouTube helped to teach my kids that sand dollars aren't just white decorations in the bathroom. The kids and I spent a half hour or more watching them move along the sand and other beach and tide pool creatures. It felt like a trip back home.

Fascinating.

All in all I think it's been a pretty good day today.

Lessons In Homeownership

Our new place has two bathrooms.

It seems so luxurious.

Today the kids were helping Dan with the dog in the bathroom upstairs.

I needed to use the bathroom.

No problem! I could go downstairs.

Not two seconds after I sat down all three of them were calling for me.

Then the two kids came and constantly knocked on the bathroom door.

I guess having two bathrooms doesn't necessarily mean privacy.

More Than Dishes

There is a job I have discovered I dislike more than doing the dishes. Packing. I hate it. I'm not very good at it and I feel like I need a break just about every hour. I keep thinking, wow, I'm getting a lot done. And wow, I've been working for so long. Then I look up at the room and I'm not even close and only been working for thirty minutes.

We got back from our awesome Disney vacation on Sunday. We have to be packing up the truck Wednesday afternoon and leaving Thursday. Now that is one hard transition.

What Life Feels Like Right Now

First we find out we might not be able to buy our new house. When that gets figured out we might not be selling this house. Finally that gets figured out and our new mortgage letter isn't filed and then its found. Then the St. Louis house has a really bad inspector.

I feel like I've been hiking the house selling/buying hike. I would be able to appreciate how beautiful my surroundings are if I weren't so exhausted.

Happy Graduation

We all knew this day was coming.

At first it seemed a long time off.

Then as we approached it excitement built.

So many plans have been made and scrapped and made again.

At first I dragged my feet, but seeing my family's happiness I couldn't hold back any longer.

We are so excited to present our new doctor.

And his dog.

He spent an hour and a half in the backyard with her today.

In the rain.

With Charlotte's pink princess umbrella.

Just trying to get house training to start right.

Nothing happened.

He came back inside.

Then she peed on the kitchen floor.

I laughed.

I've potty trained before and this seems to be exactly the same.

Happy Birthday-Let's Just Make it Another Year

After Greg fell down and had to get stitches while on vacation a friend of mine told me about her son. He's Charlotte's age and has had to get stitches once a year, every year of his life. We had a good commiseratory laugh over the crazy differences between boys and girls and I secretly prayed that I would escape that.

Well today is Greg's second birthday! Hooray! We got up and had our small family party complete with pancake cake, cantaloupe, and present opening. The presents were lovely and all adored.

After the present playtime was over I got Greg dressed in his new gorilla shirt from Grandma and Grandpa and we readied ourselves for a trip to the Botanical Gardens. While I was getting my clothing out for the day Greg climbed onto my bed and was digging through the bin I had taken off the top shelf of the closet and not replaced. You see the matches for the birthday candles were in it. Also in it was all of our families medications. I heard him shaking a bottle around and turned just in time to see him having opened one of our Rx bottles and trying to put a pill into his mouth. I practically screamed, "NO!" to him and tackled him off the bed. He was understandably upset and crying. I ascertained that he didn't eat any others. Then threw the whole bottle out. Then I asked Dan about the whole thing and he said the pills were so huge there was no way he would have been able to easily and quietly swallow any of them without me knowing. Although I was shaken I kept on getting ready for the day.

After we were all dressed I went to the basement to dig out our sunscreen from after the camping trip. Greg followed me. On the landing he tripped. Then he slid head first down the stairs. I lunged for him, but wasn't able to catch him before his head smacked every step and came to a stop on the concrete floor of the basement. That trip gave him a good bump and some scrapes on the noggin and one good puffy bump right where his stitches are. Dan heard the fall and came running and ascertained that there wasn't any serious damage.

While finishing our preparations to leave I tried to put the sunscreen on Greg. I put it on my fingers and rubbed it into both hands then went for his face. I hadn't even touched him yet when he moved to avoid me and ended up hitting his eye on my sunscreen hands. There was a lot of sunscreen that made it directly into his eye. So then we had to flush his eye. He was screaming and yelling as I held him down and Dan used the spray from the sink to get it out.

It was at this point that I started crying about how my son wasn't even going to make it through his second birthday. What a pretty picture the two of us must have made for Dan. Greg, banged up, wet, and screaming and me overreacting about the whole situation. Then our friends called to tell us that the gardens were packed.

We decided to stay home, invite friends over and play in our little pool out back. That made for a much more mellow and better birthday morning.

Happy Birthday Little Man!

A Star Is Born

This happened the other week and I wasn't going to post it. Then I read my sister's blog about how she's never been on TV. So click the link and you'll see my debut on the local St. Louis TV show Great Day St. Louis.

A BIG WEEK

There weren't any posts because we went camping. We had loads of fun and I took tons of photos (so you will be happy Katie). They will come later.

The really big news happened while camping was that we accepted an offer on our house! YEAH! I think it ended up really nicely and everyone in the situation seems to be satisfied. Now we just have to make it through the inspections and closing and then we're home free.

The closing date is June 3 which is the same as ours in Minnesota.

Easter 2011

Well, even with the frustrations Easter seemed to be a success. See for yourself.

They used the Easter baskets they made with Daddy at the Home Depot. I then decided that in order to not break every egg they should be lined.

We dyed Easter eggs on Friday. Greg thought they were balls so he threw them and stepped on them. He only got to do three. Then we put his three in the decorative shrink wrap in order to have them be usable.

We also went to the SLU alumni easter egg hunt on Saturday. Unfortunately it was indoors since we were having residual rain from the tornadoes that ripped through St. Louis Friday night. Being indoors made it really cramped and I didn't get any good photos. Charlotte got her first ever face painting that we had to wash off immediately after getting home because it was making her face itchy.

Here are the Sunday dress photos. I think they both look pretty good, even if they don't match.

I couldn't get Charlotte to just sit normally. This is the least weird of the poses she was insisting on.

Then Charlotte wanted to get behind the camera so Greg and I let her take some more photos. Should it disappoint me that she's just as good a photographer as I am? Not sure.

I Am Not A Runner

Not sure if anyone noticed, but my New Year's Resolution was to get myself in shape. Boy was that half hearted, huge flop for the beginning of the year. Then my friend, a runner, had her baby and was cleared for exercise at her six week check-up. Most of her running friends were still pregnant. I told her that I would join her since nobody else could and also she was six weeks postpartum. If someone who had a baby six weeks ago can do this then I can.

So we started. Then we were joined by her other running friends when they were cleared for exercise. Now we go so long as the weather co-operates, (nobody wants to run with a severe weather warning on our hands) our husbands are home to watch the kids, and we have enough new nursing mothers who aren't too tired to run. Sad to say, but even with all these other ladies just having had babies, I'm pretty sure I'm still the slowest. I'm super lucky to already be really close friends with them. I know that even if I slow them down, they're happy I'm there.

I'm still not a runner. I'm not very good and I wouldn't say I enjoy the feeling of breathlessness that running induces. My friend, the runner, says that nobody (not even runners) likes building up to being able to run 2 miles continuously so I'm trying and hoping she's right. After that I hope I enjoy the exercise more.

Even with all that I think this process has taught me a lot about myself.

• I may not like exercise, but I do like and even crave being with other women talking and not worrying about my kids.
• I need to have someone else counting on me to show up in order to exercise. If I don't then I wont go.
• Exercising makes me sleepy. REALLY sleepy. The past three days I've taken a nap in the afternoon and still gone to bed sometime in the 8 o'clock hour.
• I kind of like the idea of being a runner. I'm not there yet, and I'm not sure if I'll get there, but it would be cool to have something I "do" if that even makes sense.
• Though I got new running shoes at the beginning of this process, I'm becoming more aware of the running clothing that would be nice to have.
• I'm now worried/nervous about building up my abilities just to move and lose not only people to run with, but time in which I can run.

Banging Around

I love, love, love it that right now Dan has taken Charlotte down to his "shop" in the basement. They decided that Suzie really did need a cat house/climbing tree thing and since it's rainy today they have the perfect opportunity. From upstairs I'm hearing, "OK now hit the nail here.....Stand back while I make this piece shorter." And floating in and through Daddy's words and the sounds of wood moving around and pauses is the constant stream of words from his eager young helper.

Daughters need dads.

Family Photos

Yesterday we went to Purina Farms. I figured we needed to go see it at least once before we moved from St. Louis. Charlotte and Greg had great fun petting the farm animals and watching the dog show. Dan keeps using every interaction with dogs to remind the family that we're getting a dog soon. I'm fairly certain that he's way more excited than the kids about that one. After the show we wandered back to the car and on the way let the kids run in a field. We had a friend use my camera to take some family photos. Then we saw this tree and thought a photo would look pretty great in that tree.I think it looks pretty good, but in order to get into the tree here's what had to happen. Firs we start on the ground:Then he lifts me up and tickles me at the same time! It's amazing I didn't fall on his head.

Easter Frustrations

First off, I'm not crazy. I maintain that it is not crazy to want my children to coordinate in their Easter outfits and also for my son to have a shirt and tie. The holiday is on a Sunday. Every year. You'd think it wouldn't be so hard.

Second off, thanks to grandmas and aunts, I have very rarely had to purchase any clothing for either of my children. We are all so grateful for that. They have much better clothing than we could afford.

Third off, we had heard nothing about Easter outfits from anyone. I figured this year must be the first year I've got to figure this one out on my own. Not so hard I figured. Hahahaha! Not so hard! What a joke. Target had a slew of little girls Easter dresses on sale thanks to my procrastination. I found one that was appropriately cute and had other colors than just pink in it. There had to be some pink because Charlotte was with me and helping me pick one out, but I needed another color to coordinate with Greg's tie.

Then we had a week long torturous running around trying to find a white button up shirt and green tie. Also we needed new church shoes, mostly just for Greg, but I really wanted to find some cheap white ones for Charlotte. That way they would match her white Easter hat.

Why do boys get the short end of the stick with cute church clothing? Or really any Sunday appropriate clothing? Do manufacturers think boys can show up in wrinkly casual clothing to anything and be fine? Ridiculous! I found oodles of things that were adorable for Charlotte she even got new lace trimmed socks. Greg? I compromised by finding a white button up shirt without a tie and then getting a shirt and tie set at JCP. The set was a blue shirt with yellow tie. I figured I could use white shirt yellow tie. It wasn't my original idea, but it would work even though there's no yellow (or blue) in Charlotte's dress at all.

Then we went on to find shoes. We spent approximately 5 minutes in payless shoes before we found the white shoes of Charlotte's dreams. (Mom! they have jewels!) Remember she doesn't really NEED shoes, but they were on sale and cute so we got them. Greg, who has zero church shoes that fit found zero new church shoes that fit. They had exactly one option that he started screaming about as soon as it was on his foot and they weren't even that cute to begin with.

So for Easter, my daughter will have a brand spanking new out fit from head to toe that I absolutely love and my son, through no lack of searching, has whatever works and is shoeless.

Jobs I Hate

Other than the dishes which are my personal enemy there is one job that I hate more than any other.

INSURANCE

I hate figuring out what insurance we need. I hate price checking. I hate filling out forms and I hate hate HATE calling agents. Life would be so much easier if we lived in the same state as my parents and my dad could just do our insurance! It is my annual enemy.

Split In Two

Our yard is outdoing itself right now. We left last weekend for Minnesota with a yard on the verge of spring and came back last Sunday night and spring had come full force. Now this week our tulips are out in all their colors. All the annuals I planted and then were snowed on two days later still made it just fine! They are beautiful and colorful and remind me why I love annuals. And the bleeding heart and wisteria are both showing their colors. When I run in the morning there are some bushes in the park that smell exactly like fruit loops. Exactly. I love the fruit loop bushes. Also, I got to decorate the bedrooms upstairs. They are beautiful. I wasn't going to worry about them until we moved and then realized that I'd signed up to host my interior design group for the month. Turns out they are amazing. I love walking around my house right now. It's clean and put together and just makes me happy! Except for the part where I'm going to be leaving it in under two months. I just feel so torn. Or more to the point I feel like I should be feeling torn. The Minnesota trip was fun, the people were extremely friendly and I'm sure we'll enjoy it there. But right now I want to be here. I want to be in St. Louis with the people I love and my garden and the fruit loop bushes and our bedrooms that look amazing.

What We've Been Up To

Yesterday we went to the park. Charlotte rode on her new bike with training wheels and was a champ! It was pretty awesome to see. I finally told her we'd done enough riding, but the only thing that would get her off her bike was to pick flowers. Shh! Don't tell her grandma's because these are supposed to be their Christmas presents. She says they're for both grandmas because she loves them so much! Greg helped by picking flowers and then throwing them with a satisfying yell each time.
We went up to Minnesota and bought a house, or rather promised to buy a house. They accepted our offer and afterward we went to look where Dan will be employed (can you believe it?!) for the next five years. These two photos (above and below) were around the building. Up is a pretty classic photo of Charlotte.
And this is quite possibly my favorite photo of Greg of all time! It so captures him right now. Really happy when he's running!

So that's what we've been up to.

One To Remember

Today I fell totally, deeply in love. I'm head over heels and beside myself. I admit that it's sort of ridiculous how in love I fell today.

There have been quite a few moments in the past week that I'd really rather forget. Moments that mainly center around personal stupidity, selfishness, or all around crankiness are ones I think we'd all rather forget.

Today though, I want to remember forever. Today was a gift straight from heaven.

I had no plans when I woke up this morning, which is always a problem when you're trying to keep two kids entertained and your house spotless. Having gone to the Magic House yesterday I figured today was a good day for the zoo.

One problem. I didn't really want to go to the zoo. The kids were sheep that refused to be herded out the door this morning. It was almost 11 by the time we got to the zoo. With beautiful weather the free on street parking was practically all gone. I was grumpy and said, "I give up! We're going home." When Charlotte said, "Don't give up now mommy! We're almost there."

So I didn't give up. And it's a good thing I didn't. My two kids and I did the zoo in our own style. We skipped animals we didn't care about, we lingered longer at the ones we did and even spent quite some time just watching the waterfalls. I had so much fun with my kids at the zoo today.

Then after nap-time we went back out of the house to the park.

On the way home is when I fell for my kids again. There was a song on the radio that Charlotte loves. Greg's window was down and he was doing his short legged, car-seated best to hang his feet out the window. We were stopped at a red light, our windows were rolled down and I moved the rear view mirror to see my daughter's face. Her little newly sun-kissed face and bright brown eyes sang right to me, "You and me baby are stuck like glue," while her eyebrows wiggled up and down.

Right then I knew I was ridiculously in love with my kids. I will love them forever and ever and will always think they are absolutely the best children in the whole world. Stuck like glue? We sure are.

The List Just Keeps Getting Longer

Charlotte got sick in the middle of the night last night. Consequently she was stuck on the couch all day today.

All day until we got a phone call saying someone wanted to come see our house in 10 to 15 minutes. We ran around getting everything put away. We woke Greg up from his nap and buckled both kids into the car. With nothing to do we decided to head to Big Lots.

And that's where Charlotte decided to puke again.

This Is Actually Happening

Today the real estate agent came and took photos of our house. Sunday we are having our first open house. Next weekend we are going up to Minnesota to look for our new house. Our impending move from St. Louis to Minnesota and from student's family to resident's family and from well known friends to making new friends is all of a sudden so very, very real to me.

Giveaway

I don't usually do giveaways because I don't usually have anything that I think someone else might possibly want. Today though I think I might have some.

I made fabric party hats for Charlotte's birthday as party favors. I think they were a success and the kids seemed to enjoy them. There were 11 hats leftover after the party. I don't want to move 11 party hats no matter how cute they are. Six of them are "girl" hats with pink ribbons and 5 are "boy" hats with gears on them and blue ribbons. If you want them leave a comment and I'll mail them to you.

If nobody wants them they're going to be given to the goodwill. If more than one person wants them I'll chose at random. I will select the person Friday morning since I have to have the house ready for photos to be put on the market Friday afternoon!

hoodwinked

Today I was ready to buy my son new shoes. For the past couple of days he's been sort of complaining about wearing his sneakers. Then this morning as soon as I put them on his feet he started yelling, "OW! OW!OW!OW!" until he sat down and ripped his shoes and then even the offending socks off his feet. He calmed down immediately, but wanted the shoes back on. I put them on and the same thing happened. I finally convinced him to wear his boots just so we could make it out of the house. Before buying new sneakers I decided to have his feet measured so we went to the stride rite store after dinner and guess what. Both kids have exactly the same size feet they had last fall. Greg is in a 6.5 wide and Charlotte is in a 10. It's a good thing I got it checked because otherwise I'd have been tricked by my kids again.

Sorry for the long absence. We were celebrating. First match day, with its mix of emotions. Then my birthday, with its mix of emotions. Then, we talked to some realtors about selling our house, with its mix of emotions. Then finally, Charlotte's two solid days of birthday bliss, with its mix of emotions.

To celebrate my birthday we had the birthday breakfast and then got to work on the house. We took a short break from work though to take a family trip to the botanical gardens. Charlotte had decided to wear her party clothing to celebrate the day. It was so much fun to walk behind her and watch everyone's face as they passed her. AMAZING. Also, I got the best homemade cards from Charlotte that day, including a portrait of me consisting of a head with arms and legs.

Charlotte was so stoked about her birthday I knew that even with all the stress I couldn't really skip a party for her. We had her birthday breakfast and our family went all out showing their love for her from across the country. She skyped with grandmas and aunts and uncles. She recieved wonderful gifts and cards and she felt so special.

Then came time to prepare for her birthday party on Saturday. She had been talking about nothing else since a week before my birthday. So I decided that I would rather cook a lot of food and have a big family style party than a smaller, kids only party. That way I would get to see my friends close to my birthday too. It started out small in my mind, but ended up HUGE. This was pretty much the last time we were going to be able to invite everyone over to our place. Plus, I figured we could have it outside.

Well, on the day of the party it snowed.

Even though it snowed our friends showed up in droves. We squeezed into the house and I prayed that nothing serious would happen to the place as parents and children moved around en masse. I am so grateful to our friends for making this happiness happen for Charlotte:

What a great week.

Happy Birthday to MEEEEE

It is a little ridiculous how excited I get for my birthday. Every year I keep waiting for me to not get so excited, and every year I still am.

There are two presents and two cards sitting on the top of our secretary for me to open tomorrow. I've been eyeing them for days. What could they possibly be?! And Daniel's present to me isn't even there yet.

I'm also super excited for my daughter's birthday next Friday. We're having a huge informal bbq for her on Saturday and I've been starting to think about how much fun I can make the day for her.

I CAN'T EVEN WAIT.

But I guess I'll have to since I'm married to the King of Waiting.

Boo-yah

Dan's hands were shaking when he opened the letter. I was about to throw up.

Then relief.

Minnesota!

After the ceremony we went home and I practically passed out asleep. I guess the release from the stress was a whole lot.

Add it To the List

Charlotte is a puker. I think she follows in her Aunt Katie's footsteps really well. She once puked totally unexpectedly while sitting on my lap waiting to get the oil changed in the car. It was amazing how quickly those men got me out of there.

Today we went in for her well child check. She has a cold, but I didn't figure it was a big deal. I even told them to give her one shot today so that when we come back after she's well she wont have to get five all together. (FIVE!) There were a lot of coughs and gags during the visit, but nothing big. Then in the lobby on the way out she emptied her stomach on the floor.

And then in the car on the way home.

I want Your Opinion

We found this in our alley. It is sturdy. The wood on the legs is still in tact and isn't scratched up. It's just super ugly and the fabric and padding is totally ripped up. I had Dan bring it home. I know it would take an investment to recover, but I think I could do it. As you can see though it hasn't made it inside the house though. I'm not sure if it would be worth the effort. So here's the question:

Do you think I should keep this to take on as a project?

The Marathon

I once saw this video of a woman running through the finish line of a marathon to win the big race. Only she wasn't running really. More like she was wobbling her way to the finish line. She kept willing her body to move forward even though it was clearly through with the whole thing. She would wobble and almost fall and then get back up. I think one time she did actually fall, but then picked herself up again. She ended up getting second (if memory serves) to another who came from pretty far behind. Even with having zero experience running the image has been burned onto my memory for years. She was just.so.close.

Today Dan got the email that said he matched. We find out on Thursday where. And also we have the last of the doors for the house drying in the basement waiting to be hung. And we're almost ready to paint the final bedroom upstairs. I feel like we are just.so.close.

And yet, my energy is flagging. Tensions are running a little higher between Dan and I than usual. I keep losing my cool with my kids. They are driving me crazy with fighting and with playing and all the talking (and screaming). When Dan isn't home it's like there's a 10 ft invisible rope attached to me and they can't possibly be any farther away. Sweet yes, but I'd really like to take a shower without having to negotiate a peace pact over the bathroom door. They are also being so cute with each other. I wish I could just stay positive more with them. I just want our positive momentum to bring us on home through this finish line. We really have some good momentum going on, but I feel like all of us in this house are hitting the end of our abilities to cope with this situation.

We may not be getting through graduation with flying colors and flags waving, but I'm sure I've watched races with that sort of ending and I can't remember a single one right now. Perhaps this ending (or beginning?) will be more memorable.

Diagnosis: Fatigue

For a while now I've been getting really tired during the afternoon. I figured everyone got tired during the afternoon and tried not to let it bother me. Then Dan started to have more time to spend at home during the afternoons. He would be working around the house and I would crash on the sofa almost everyday. Even if I pushed through the initial drowsiness once Greg woke up from his nap he would want to cuddle. Sitting on the sofa cuddling with a warm body is not the way to avoid napping. It was really hard to not start feeling bad about it. Dan was working so hard and I was spending at least an hour sleeping in the middle of the day. I still tried to wave away the feeling that something was off. Then Dan told me that I really should go see a doctor. That was a shocker. When the doctor, who doesn't really believe in getting sick, tells you to go see a doctor it really means something.

So today I went to the doctor. I told them I felt healthy and normal, but that I was getting tired in the afternoons almost every afternoon. I have to go in to get some blood work done to make sure I'm not anemic or have thyroid problems, but they're pretty sure I don't since I don't have any of the other symptoms associated with that. The whole thing just seemed like a big mystery and the thought bubble over the doctor's head was reading, "everyone gets tired."

Then the doctor asked me if I'd been sick lately. I told him about the massive cold I had a while back that pretty much wiped me out and the puzzle on his face visibly lifted. Apparently what with that bad cold, and selling the house, being the mom of two kids, and not knowing where we're moving my immune system decided to just stop working so well. Sometimes a virus can just suck the energy out of a person for months even a year after the initial cold is over with. He said to go easy on myself, drink water, and don't really expect to feel 100% until after we move. Great timing huh?

The funny part came when I was reading my discharge papers.
Reason for visit: complaint of fatigue

Diagnosis: fatigue

Really?

A Break

Today I decided to take a break. I didn't go for my morning walk with my friend at 6. I slept in and my sweet husband let me sleep in past the kids waking up. And he got breakfast ready for me when I came downstairs.

My next decision was to take a break from working on our house. I know it's madness this close to selling, but so was my state of mind. Also my house is so messy I can't find anything and so dirty that it sort of grosses me out to walk around in it. My plan was to clean and straighten.

Then Charlotte asked me to make a hand print butterfly out of construction paper with her. So I decided to take a break from everything else to trace her hands four times on each color of paper so we could cut them out and glue them together into the most beautiful rainbow butterfly.

Then Charlotte's dog was bored. So he decided to help me pick up their bedroom/toy room. That is one helpful puppy. Greg also helped too.

I decided that I wanted to get dressed so in order to do that I needed to pick up my room and fold a few items of laundry. Charlotte had other plans. I took a break from that to have show and tell time downstairs. My show and tell item was a red hot pad, Greg's was a toy drill, and Charlotte's was a family photo with Santa from last Christmas.

I went upstairs to finish folding laundry. Charlotte decided to be a tickle ghost/zombie by piling 4 or 5 blankets on her and growling at me. I decided to take a break. I played along with her and I grabbed her and tickled her. She squealed, grabbed her blankets and ran across the landing to her room for refuge. Then she came back for more. Unfortunately when you can't see where you're going you tend to walk where you shouldn't. She fell down the stairs. Fortunately she had 4 or 5 blankets on her so she didn't get hurt at all.

While I was showering she put the blankets away (!) and got out towels because we were going to the beach. Greg was acting really sad and screaming. I realized this was probably because it was lunchtime. Time to get back to work. I told her I couldn't got to the beach because I needed to get lunch ready. She was sad. So I decided to take a break and we had a picnic lunch at the beach today. We packed our turkey sandwiches in her picnic basket and climbed the stairs to the beach. She told me the rules at the beach are that there is no "glittering" (littering) and no sharing food. We followed the rules strictly.

The day's only half way over and not much has actually been accomplished. It still has been more fun than anything we've done in a long time.

Please Excuse Me

Dear Friends and Family,

It is a week and a half before we know what our next five years holds. (Match Day: March 17)

I'm hosting preschool this week.

I'm cooking for the missionaries this week.

I'm doing my visiting teaching.

I have to go to the doctor's this week.

I'm trying to get our house ready to sell in about two weeks.

So,

If I end up sounding a little extra crazy I do apologize in advance. Give it a couple of weeks and then I should be back to my normal level of crazy.

Thanks,
Maggie

Shocking

One of the biggest shocks I've had in my life lately came from a casual comment one of my very good friends said to me. We had been talking about how many unexpected struggles we have encountered in motherhood. I can't remember exactly what she said, but it was something to the effect of, when she sees me and how good I am with my kids she sometimes gets discouraged.

This was shocking for a few reasons. First is that I think that she is an amazing mom. One "secret" about motherhood is that although we may love our kids, we don't get to choose their personality. Often times, for me anyway, it is working through the clashes in personality and will within our home that are some of the biggest things my family works on. I think she does this quite well so it was shocking to hear that she may not think so.

The second reason that this shocked me is that we are close enough friends that I feel she's seen me truly lose it with my kids. I mean lose it where I end up having to go back and apologize to my kids. I don't know if other mothers have to do this, but I've lost it before and then felt even more guilt for yelling at my kids. Then I have to go back and apologize and explain to them about my behavior being naughty and doing what I can to fix it. I don't know if everyone agrees with this parenting philosophy, but that's what seems fair to me. I know that she's seen this happen, so it shocks me to think that she has this idea that I'm such a "good mom" it would actually be difficult to be her true self around me.

After thinking about this for a while I think I've learned a few things. First is that, at least for my friend and I, we are harsher on ourselves than we are on others. Why is that I wonder? I'm sure Heavenly Father loves so much despite our imperfections. Why can't we do the same? Second, no matter how close you are to a friend, you never can see behind a closed door or into another's heart. I think I need to ask more questions and wait to listen to the entire answer. Third, being a true friend is to have patience with your imperfections and those of the people around you and being honest and happy about it. I see so much beauty in my friends here in St. Louis that it is heart wrenching to leave them.

Gramps

I was reading this post about grandpas and it made me think of my dad. He has always been such a great example of what a dad should be-someone who takes his responsibility seriously, but also knows that its OK to be the comic relief. I thought about one of the photos that I have on my computer of my dad holding my kid. I loved that photo, but I couldn't remember which kid so I searched around a bit and figured out why.

I guess now I'll need to take one like this for every kid.

Pre-School

We have a carpool for pre-school. I drive Charlotte and her little friend to school and the other mom picks them up. It's pretty awesome.

Also, sometimes we host pre-school at our house and sometimes I'm the helper at someone else's house.

All told Greg has had a pretty good look at what pre-school is for Charlotte and he loves it. Last week I was the helper and Greg came along with me. He sat for storytime, he listened for listening time, he did the exercises during exercise time and the crafts at craft time. I was pretty impressed and I think it was the influence of 6 other 3 and 4 year olds that kept him going in the right direction.

Today I dropped the girls off at pre-school. After they got out of the car and he realized that he wasn't getting out of the car his little heart was broken. He melted into a sad pool of snot and tears in his car seat. I ran in, dropped them off, and then ran back to the car. I asked him, "Did you want to go to pre-school?" To which is sad little response was, "uh-huh." Sorry kid, maybe when you're older.

Because I like It

Charlotte looking down at me from the top of the climbing wall at the playground. She was very proud to have done it all by herself. Also the afternoon of this day it was 70 degrees. It will be spring soon!

The Doctors of Tomorrow

Last week the impending sale of our house suddenly hit me. Well, it wasn't selling the house that hit me, but rather all the work we have left to do before we list the house. That's a lot of work. After my panicking for about a day Dan gave in and let me ask our friends for help. Last Saturday this is what our backyard looked like:I am blown away by the willingness of our friends to set aside all their plans to help us. This was a totally free weekend for all the medical students (a rarity) and I knew that and still I asked them for help. I was sure it would be too much to ask and yet they just kept coming in. And they brought their wives and kids too.
Another friend of mine offered to supply a dinner for everyone so that I wouldn't have to spend my time doing that. She showed up with the delicious brisket with plenty of time to also pick up a paint brush and touch up our spindles. We are so blessed to be living in a community of future doctors that are willing to go out of their way to help us and also offer their kids to help watch ours. It is amazing. Things we got done:

• Paint touch up
• Half dead tree in backyard removed
• Gardens edged
• Mostly dead plants removed
• All doors (but the bathroom) in the house taken down and sanded so that we can paint them
• Window sills scraped and cleaned
• Valence in kitchen re-hung

Are we totally ready? No. It will still be a lot of work the next month or so, but at least it feels do-able now. So a big, super huge thank you to everyone.

Top 5

My husband is usually a very decisive person. He makes a decision and then confidently sticks with it. That is why making our rank list has been maddening. We're both stressed and coming at it from different angles and other little things have been becoming big. That is why last night, when he turned to me and told me we needed to talk about it again, I told him it was the last time we were re-hashing it. After constant flip-flopping our top five locations are as follows:

1. Salt Lake City, Utah
2. Rochester, Minnesota
3. Fresno, California
4. Hershey, Pennsylvania
5. Seattle, Washington

So there they are. It would be nice to get into one of those top five, but he did submit a rank list of 13 places. Now it's just a 25 day waiting game.

Golden Quotes

Charlotte talks so much! She talks so much she forgets to do whatever it is she started doing. Breakfast takes 40 minutes for her to eat a bowl of cereal because she has just kept talking. Getting dressed is oppressively slow as is getting pajamas on. Mostly I just feel like I'm floating through a flood of words and I probably catch only 3/4 of them. I just don't have the energy to listen to all of them. The plus side to all this talking is that she's four so sometimes they are laugh out loud funny. I'll share two of my favorites.

I taught Charlotte Hark the Herald Angels Sing for Christmas. Big mistake because she's just now getting enough of the words to sing by herself. I'm starting to feel really bad about how much my sister and I watched White Christmas the year we recieved that movie. Here is how the song goes when she sings it:
"Hark the Herald Angels Sing,
Glory to the new born King.
Peace on Earth and mercy mild,
God and Satan reconciled.
hmm, hmm, hmm nations rise
hmm, hmmm, hmmm,
With the Jellied Toast proclaim
Christ is Born in Bethlehem
Hark the Herald Angels sing
Glory to the new born King."

Also? She has yet to figure out pitch. So her little serious self is pretty much just yelling this at all times.

The second quote I'd like to share happened yesterday at lunch. I often prepare condensed tomato soup with noodles for my kids. It was a family thing for Dan's family and it turns out is also very kid friendly and cheap. I can count it a 100% success rate for my kids eating it. Anyway, I was rushing yesterday and so the soup was super hot when it came to the table. I told the kids to eat their carrot sticks and fruit smoothie while they waited for it to cool. Charlotte did so and then wanted to check on the soup. After checking she said, "The noodles? Too Hot. The Bra? Perfect." I couldn't hold in my laughter.

As an aside, I feel like we're finally getting the last of the house stuff pulled together. We still have so much to finish, but at least there will be time to get it done now. Also? Dan and I flip flop daily on where we think The Match will send us. Yesterday I was convinced it was Minnesota and Dan thought Pennsylvania.

Inner Gauge

Do you ever sometimes have a very strong reaction to something, but have to stop yourself because you're not sure if you're over-reacting or if your reaction is totally justified? Something totally upsets you, but maybe its just in the moment and a while later you will look back and tell yourself that it wasn't that big a deal. That happens to me a lot. In fact, I count it one of the many marks of growing up that I wait a few beats to react to things. I'm pretty sure that Daniel taught me that. He is amazing at waiting for perspective. Not just a few beats of perspective either. He can wait days or weeks even. Then, if something is still bothering him, he will bring it up. We have avoided countless hurt feelings and angry words by just taking time before talking about things.

I realize that is only one way to responsibly communicate and deal with situations. My sister has said that she is somewhat the opposite. She has learned that if something bothers her she needs to let others know instead of just letting it go. Because just letting it go doesn't really always happen, more often than not it bottles up inside of her. I guess she has the tendency to never tell people, which would then, over time build pressure and explode.

Today something happened with a friend of mine which I'm not going into. I was very angry at the time, but tried my best to just let things cool off. I'm not angry anymore, it really wasn't a big deal, but I'm still bothered by it. Part of me says I should say something. Part of me says that being a good friend is overlooking little situations like these. Part of me says that in a few months we wont even be living in the same state so I should just let it go. How do I know which would be the most responsible behavior?

Picking Cities

Let's play pretend. You get to chose where you will be moving your family in a few months for a semi-permanent amount of time. (That's not our situation really, but do you remember the pretend part?) Here are your choices:

• Fresno, California
• Salt Lake City, Utah
• Seattle, Washington
• Rochester, Minnesota
• Hershey, Pennsylvania

In this pretend scenario your husband will have the same job opportunities, whatever they may be. So that part is not taken into account. What would your choices be and if you feel like sharing why would you chose them?

The problem is that I know very little about all but two of those cities. And of those two I only know them from the viewpoint of a child, not as an adult and mother. The lack of knowledge seems to make the picking much, much harder.

But this is a pretend game so you can chose the cities for whatever reasons you like. So let's hear it.

The Aftermath of Snow Days

I'm not sure if you're aware of this but half the country is pretty much covered with ice right now. We happen to have missed the worst of it by about 30 miles. Does it ever make you wonder about St. Louis always missing the worst of it? Anyway, being on the fringe was bad enough for St. Louis and shut the city down for about two days.

Today though, Charlotte was going to pre-school. It was my turn to drop her and her friend off so I went out a half hour early and started the car. I knew I was in trouble when it took a couple of tries.

After warming for about 15 minutes it took another 15 to scrape the half inch of ice off. I thought to myself, "Good thing I started a half hour ago. We aren't even late!" Then I went to open the back fence. FROZEN shut. The lock was frozen which I chipped free. The latch into the ground was frozen which I kicked free. After that I thought I was home free, but no. The gate runs on two wheels. Two wheels that were two inches deep in layers of ice and snow like the best concrete lasagna you could dream of.

I had been working for about thirty minutes total now and my snot was starting to freeze in my nose when I thought, perhaps if I just kick the fence it will dislodge the wheels. So I turned around and shoved with my foot backwards and something gave way! Too bad it wasn't the wheels.

The slat in the fence is broken. Sorry Sweetie!

PS. Greg loves Ice Age The Meltdown. More specifically he loves the saber toothed squirrel. It cracks him up. Charlotte, however, likes to narrate the jokes. After watching it she says, "He never gets the acorn, but he does get to see the acorn goodness of squirrel heaven."